Summer Camp, Detention Camp Same thing
by ThisIsPerfection
Summary: Flooding the local coffee house with 8 gallons of milk was only the start of her troubles. Rachel thinks she's being sent to a Summer camp called Camp Green Lake to escape her boredom. Oh how wrong she is.
1. Blame the Milk Frother

Hey hey hey readers. I decided to write a GACGL that had a normal background and isn't a hard ass. This is my first EVER fanfic ever on this site, so be nice when you review which you obviously will because you are all amazing! Well anyways, I hope you like!

I don't own Holes or the Bean Bar or The Coffee House or Bean around the World or anything like that. Only Rachel and her family (except the Warden and Trout ectc) is mine.

Over and Out

xox

Waking up on the wrong side of the bed was soon to be the least of my problems. Ironically, It was the _reason_ for all my problems. My mum had got me a summer job in _The Bean Bar_ to keep me busy before I started school in September. Since I had just moved here from England and hadn't made any friends yet (and it was kind of all her fault) she felt obliged to keep me entertained. It would have been fun, except for the fact that my boss is total nightmare, she's a perfectionist and thinks that the world revolves around her poxy shopping mall coffee shop. Needless to say when my alarm went off at the criminal time of 7 am in the summer holidays, I was not in the greatest of moods. As I trudged downstairs mum was bustling around, shoving toast in her mouth and grabbing a gold scarf to shove in her bag.

"Rae, what goes with these?" she asked holding up a pair of white sandals. I shrugged

"You're the designer," I said running my fingers through the nest that had collected on top of my head.

"You're right," she said running around the kitchen.

"Oh Rae!" she suddenly exclaimed in desperation. "I'm so late! I was up all night trying to finish the last in the collection. Would you take to Noah to school?"

"Holidays mum," I said reminding her casually, trying to decide what to eat.

"I know, don't be late for work. Noah's got summer school."

"Summer school?" I asked in despair "What?"

"Yeah, I'm apparently too dumb to have a holiday," Noah (little bro) said stomping downstairs.

"Yes you are honey," mum said oh so nicely "Rachel's going to take you there. Aren't you love?" she asked threateningly.

"Nyuh," I answered drinking orange juice then made a face "This is foul!" I exclaimed, nearly spitting the offending drink out.

"Don't say that Rachel, you sound too English," mum said

"Excuse me, in case it's passed your notice for the past fifteen years. I am," I said.

"Yeah and you're going to draw even more attention to yourself if you don't adopt this accent," she answered still racing around the house "Seen my-?" she began asking

"Under the table," I called back. Where everything other piece of her clothing lived. Messy biatch.

"Have fun darlings!" she cooed

"Now who sounds like an English prat?" I asked sarcastically.

"I never called you a prat," she answered and left. I rolled my eyes

"Hey lil' bro," I said ruffling Noah's hair. "Eat food then we'll scoot off to dumbass school,"

He just smiled, knowing full well that he was stupid. But he was a freaking awesome little brother, what he lacked in educational intelligence, he completley made up in common sense. We were a team, us against the world (or mum as the case usually is).

"I don't like America," he mumbled as we walked to my work.

"Hmmm," I just answered. "It's sunnier," I tried tempting him. Back in England rain was so common you'd think it was monsoon season all year round.

"I get burnt," he shot back, I smiled.

"It's bigger. Better shops!"

"Easier to get lost. And I hate shopping,"

"Jeez Noah! Tough! We live here now." I didn't like it here either, but mum had just hit her big break and we couldn't hold her back. Plus her entire family lives here. We'd met our grandparents about twice in our lives and we were both too young to remember (or in Noah's case not born yet on one occasion) and we had never met our Mum's sister. I had always wondered about her, apparently her and our mum had a huge fall out over the 'family business' and haven't seen each other for a while. This was also another reason why mum wanted to move back to America, she said she hated not talking to her only sister and she would hate it if Noah and I fell out like that, so she was going to build bridges. Later on I found out I was her secret weapon. But back to walking to work.

"Right Noah, tell mum I walked you all the way and you meet me when you've finished school and I'll get you that game you wanted yeah?" I said when I came to the entrance of the mall

"Deal," he said nodding.

"Good, have fun!" I said sarcastically. He laughed bitterly.

"You're seven minutes late," barked Zoë, (AKA Boss from hell)

"Sorry. I had to take my little brother to school,"

"Rachel. That's not a valid excuse. It's the summer holidays," she said whilst making a milkshake. Seriously, who would get up this early just for a milkshake?

"He's got summer school," I answered

"Yeah sure," she said disbelievingly "Now serve that man over there," she said. I sighed and walked over to him from behind the counter

"What can I get you?" I asked smiling depsite the fact my face (and brain) had failed to wake up yet.

"Do you do table service?" he barked grumpily, wearing an ugly grey suit and an even uglier expression...

"No, it's a take out only," I said pleasently.

"Useless," he muttered under his breath, well he hissed it to himself really, however he said it I still heard it.

"I'll take one Americano, strong, large, no sprinkles, no stupid powder dust, no flake, no cream, no biscuit on the side, no food, and no I don't want anything else," he said. Okay no messing with this guy. I rolled my eyes when I turned to make the coffee. Zoë saw and hit my arm

"Respect," she hissed giving me a look that Satan himself would retreat from.

"Sorry," I said trying to sound sincere and, through some miracle, managed to make his coffee without spitting in it.

"That 2.10," I said remembering to say dollars instead of pounds. He spluttered the coffee he had just swigged all over me. I looked at the soggy apron in disgust, closed my eyes and prayed for strength.

"What?" he screamed "An Americano costs 1.85 in _The Coffee House_!" he yelled. "It's preposterous!" I was about to ask him why he just didn't go to _The Coffee House_ instead of coming here and ruining my day by spitting coffee all over me, when Zoë came over to see what he was shouting about.

"Is everything okay here?" she asked politely, but I could hear the strain in her voice.

"Of course not!" Mr Ugly Grey Suit said. "This woman's surely overcharged me,"

"Rachel!" Zoë scolded, blaming me immediately. Who ever thought that the customer was always right needed some talking to.

"How can I have overcharged him?" I asked in my defence "He's only bought one thing! It's there, the price is there on the board behind me," I pointed dramatically at the big black board that stood behind me. Written on it in white fancy writing was each drink (or snack) we sold with the price next to it. Clearly, oh so very clearly was 'Americano-2.10'. I very smugly turned back to him, with that I-was-right expression fixed _firmly_ on my face. Instead of apologising and humbly paying for his drink, his face grew redder and redder.

"That can't be right!" he exclaimed "You can't be allowed to charge these extortionate prices. It's theft, pure theft. Outrages,"

Boy this guy was getting on my wick. It was 25c, 25 measly cents more than what he paid at '_The Coffee House'_. That was 13p in England. Absolutely ridiculous. He still hadn't paid so I casually reminded him.

"I'm sorry but that's still 2.10." I said.

"No! I'm not paying that. I want a refund, you can have your coffee back." What was this guys problem? Was he on a 1.85 budget or something .

"We can't take it back," I answered my voice little louder than usual "Because you spat it all over me," I gestured the brown coffee stain on my apron angrily. "Just pay, and leave!" I suggested through gritted teeth. He looked momentarily shocked when he realised he wasn't the only one who was prepared to get aggressive. Grumblingly and muttering things to himself (I reckoned they were death threats upon me and the Coffee Shop), he handed over the money.

"This better be one bloody good coffee," he said on his way out. As soon as he had gone Zoë rounded on me.

"What was that about?" she yelled hysterically, her dark hair frizzing out of it's last minute ponytail. "You do not argue with me in front of the customer, you do not argue with the customer! You especially do not yell at him you impertinent, stupid little girl,"

How could she blame me? What had I done wrong except defend her pathetic little coffee shop and her pricing decisions?

"Oh I'm sorry," I answered sarcastically "I must have missed that briefing,"

She narrowed her eyes at me "Thin ice," she warned with venom in her voice. "Another trick like that will cost you your job,"

I shut my mouth. I would be unbelievably bored out of my brains if I lost this job, There were no other vacancies now that the holidays had started and everyone else wanted money and jobs. I wasn't prepared to get up at a criminally early hour just to get to work on time that was like a million miles away.

"Sorry," I mumbled. Zoë nodded, a scowl on her face, and went back to filling up the cake stand.

The rest of the morning was horrifically uneventful. The incident with Ugly Grey Suit Man had got me thinking, maybe Zoë should lower some of her prices, the competition was clearly holding the Upper Hand, the amount of people going into _Bean Around the World_ compared to ours was clearly at least double. I decided to be the ever fantastic Business entrepreneur and discuss the matter with Zoë.

"Hey Zoë. You know that Ugly Suit Man?" I asked.

Big mistake.

I was surprised her head didn't drop off, she did not take one breath during the entire three minute lecture of respect for customers. I decided to get back to the point.

"Yes I know I'm sorry. But maybe he had point, maybe you are charging too much for a shopping mall Coffee shop. What if you sent me to check out the prices in _Bean Around the World_, and you can base your new pricing on that," I thought it was amazingly intelligent of me to think of the secret spy bit. Obviously Zoë was still in a bad mood about the whole 'me exploding in front of the customer' thing because she grew even redder.

"Why? So I can go bankrupt? So I'll have to sell my life long ambition? I've worked way too hard and long on this project for some skinny little British know-it-all to come and persuade me to 'lower my prices'" this she said in a cruel imitation of my accent "so that her mother can move in and turn this into some kind of hippie fashion celebration!"

No wonder we were getting half as much customers as the competition, _I_ wouldn't want to buy coffee from a mad shrieking woman who's hair had gone wild with the crazy. And what was that about my mum? She was totally mental. I shrugged

"Never mind," and went back to what I was doing.

Which was nothing.

In the afternoon a few girls came in, presumably after their shopping trip, for some coffee. One had a boy with her and it seemed he had dragged his mate along too. His friend looked terribly bored, I thought he could have got on with one of the their girls but after a few moments of listening to their shrieks and cries of indecision, I knew exactly how the boy felt. Zoë left to go into the back room and told me to handle them, I got the faint impression she didn't like kids. After what felt like a year and three days the giggling friends had decided what they wanted. I made it as a batch, put it on the counter and took their money.

"The chocolate dust and cream stuff is over there," I said vaguely waving in the direction of the toppings "It's self service but don't go mad, my boss will kill me," I said wearily, massaging my temples as the shrieks went straight through me. The boy who had been dragged along was standing by the counter, looking at his shoes.

"Do you want to get anything or…?" I asked kindly, feeling sympathy for the poor lad.

"Oh...I…err…umm yeah…sure I'll have a…a…" he studied the board. "Any recommendations?" he asked. I shook my head

"S'all crap," I said without thinking. He smiled. "I mean…" I hit my head realising my mistake "the milkshakes good," I said. It was half true, it was good when you stirred it for about three hours to get the lumps out.

"I'll have one of them. Banana." he decided. I smirked, I liked this guy. Banana would be my first choice. Oh yeah, because that's what you want to base a relationship on Rachel, your milkshake preferences. I told myself.

He winced as one of the girls cooed his name from the Topping Counter.

"Wiiiill!!" she simpered "Hurry uuuuup! Look at all the chocolate we can have!" she held up her coffee and we saw that one quarter of the paper cup was filled with chocolate powder, the cream underneath was struggling to hold the weight. The boy, who's name I now knew was Will, turned back to me.

"You want something stronger?" I teased.

"Don't tempt me," he answered half smiling. I turned to make the milkshake, congratulating myself on putting on a clean apron after I was rudely spat upon. Mixing up the powder I decided that if I gave him a lumpy milkshake, he probably wouldn't come back. And I wanted him to come back. So my mind struck into ingenious mode and I spotted the Milk Frother. A wave of inspiration struck me like a ten ton wagon.

Oh I was clever.

If I mixed the mixture in this, there was no way it would be lumpy, just glorious, frothy, tasty milkshake. I even amazed myself sometimes. In my excitement however I forgot to put the milk into the special protective metal container and just attached the paper cup onto the Frother.

"So do you work here most days?" asked Will, who looked impressed at our 'Milkshake Mixer'. I nodded. "Yeah. I'm stuck here all summer." I wasn't going to tell him it was my first day. Looking back on it though, I wish I had, then he might have taken a cautious step back when I pressed the 'on' button. The paper cup exploded under the pressure of the vibration, not only soaking me and Will in lumpy, sticky milkshake, but the whole counter and half the shop.

"Fuck!" I cried as the girls from the Topping Counter squealed. Wow I didn't realise how much milkshake one cup could hold. It was flowing like a Tsunami-.

I turned around and groaned. In my desperation to get away from the exploding milkshake I had knocked an eight gallon container of milk over. It went incredibly far, milk, when it wanted to. Very spectacular to watch how fast it streamed out into the mall. Not as spectacular as watching how fast Zoë streamed out from the back room and started yelling at me. It was highly embarrassing. Especially since a milk sodden Will was witness to her complete eruption. If I wasn't so annoyed with myself I would have been impressed, Zoë's explosion was better than the milkshake's.

"I'm so sorry Zoë. I was just trying to make the Milkshake better," I said trying to justify my actions. And failing. Even _I_ would have fired me.

"I've had enough of your 'improvements'." she hissed, way too mad to even raise her voice. "Rachel you are so fired,"

Balls. I should have seen _this_ coming. Zoë was apologising to Will and his ruined shirt.

"Don't worry," she said reassuringly. "You'll get a new one out of her wages,"

Freaking hell, she sure as hell knew nothing about the latest fashion. With the measly wages she was paying me he'd be lucky to get one trainer (or sneaker as is said here in America). He just smiled and told her not to worry about it.

"I'm sure the stain will come out," he said, "I've got a spare shirt in my bag anyways."

I, needless to say, felt rather like a tit. Well that's a story for the grandkids. I got fired on my first day of my first job by flooding the shop with milk and exploding a milkshake on a cute guy.

A/N: Reveiw!! Got any ideas? Share them with me!! Ly


	2. Mum's Boredom Remedy

A/N: Hey i know everyone hates these in the middle of a story but i just wanted to say that this is the only part in the story that isn't written from Rachel's point of veiw. I thought i'd put it in just so that it you know i hadn't forgotton about the guys. It may seem a little wierd but meh. Love y'all xox

Stanley looked at his hands and sighed, the blisters had calloused over and his hands felt rough on the rest of his skin. He had finished his hole for the day and decided to skip the Wreck Room, he was too distracted to hang out with the rest of the guys. All day he had been daydreaming, it had been a month, exactly, since he'd come to Camp Green Lake. He still remembered his first day here, his first hole, his first shower. All horrific experiences he wished to forget. He hated being in the sweltering heat, he hated feeling thirsty, he hated Camp Green Lake, and he sure as hell hated digging. Hearing the tent flap he looked up. Zigzag and Armpit walked in, talking about something.

"…last one was Caveman and he ain't no entertainment," Armpit was saying. At the mention of his nickname Stanley sat up.

"Huh?" he said suddenly interested. Zigzag rolled his electric eyes

"We need new people!" he said. "It's getting boring here again."

"Mmhmmm," Armpit agreed. "Wonder who sent Magnet that letter?" he added. Zigzag nodded enthusiastically, his eyes wide.

"Yeah! he seemed pretty protective," Zigzag said suspiciously "His girlfriend?"

Throughout their conversation they had failed to notice the arrival of Zero, who came in quietly and lay on his bed, staring at the roof of the tent.

"Hey Zero!" Zigzag called when he finally noticed the small boy's arrival "Had any letters from all _your_ girlfriends lately?" he snickered and Armpit laughed. Zero simply ignored them and carried on daydreaming. The rest of the D-tenters came in later on and settled down.

"Who sent you the letter?" Armpit demanded from Magnet. He narrowed his eyes in response

"None of your business," he answered. "Just cause I have people who love me," he shot at Armpit, who turned to Zigzag.

"From his mom," he mouthed and they both sniggered. Stanley rolled his eyes and rolled over. X-Ray was telling Zigzag and Armpit to butt out and Magnet was sulking. Squid was unusually quiet and Zero was as usual quiet. Tomorrow would come too soon, another day, another hole. Stanley was beginning to agree with the others. They needed a new person to shake things up a bit.

Fired. The word still swam cruelly around my head.

Fired.

On the first day.

"Great," I muttered to myself, slouching on the sofa watching some crap on television. I heard footsteps outside and groaned. This would be mum back. Wanting to know how it went. Oh dear god, she'll be in for a shock. I sure was in for a shock when it turned out to be my dad instead of mum.

"Hey," he said, walking into the sitting room. "What you doing sitting in the dark?"

I had drawn the curtains to shut out the outside world, I didn't need reminding that I wouldn't be enjoying the incredible American sun. I just shrugged in response.

"How was your first day at work?" he asked kindly, sitting by me and wrapping his arm around my shoulder. I buried my head in a pillow and muffled

"I got fired,"

There was a brief silence, then my dad took the pillow from my face and asked calmly.

"How?" I shook my head, I didn't want to answer, it was too highly embarrassing. "Come on," he encouraged.

"I shouted at a customer for being grumpy and spitting coffee at me, then I exploded a milkshake on me and another customer and probably broke the Milk Frother in the process and then flooded the coffee shop with milk," I answered.

Another pause.

"So all in all not the perfect day at work?" he simply asked. I looked at him in despair.

"This is unbelievable! I've nothing to do! Nowhere to go. It's gonna be hell. Three months of boredom. Yay." I moaned.

"Well…" I could practically hear his mind whirring, looking for the 'silver lining' "…at least you got one days worth of wages off that wretched woman," he reasoned. Wrong again. I shook my head

"No. She said I cost her more than I earned. I actually ended up paying _her _money,"

"Oh," Dad answered in a small voice "We'll find you something to do,"

"Yes but what you think is fun and I think is fun are two complete different things," I said in despair.

"Your mum will think of something," he said reassuringly. "She's good like that,"

"Nyuh," I said switching the channel.

"Cheer up chuck," he said kissing my forehead then leaving the room. I sighed and waited for mum to come home.

That evening, whilst eating dinner, Darling Mother turned to me.

"Your dad told me about what happened today, and I've been thinking," Oh God, here we go. It'll be, 'I think you should grovel to that awful witch of a woman for your job back because it is a responsibility that you took on and a commitment that you should honour,' however I was strangely surprised. "You've never met your Aunt Louise have you?" she asked. I did a double take.

"N-no," I answered. My mum nodded.

"I've been thinking," she continued, "and she's in charge of a Camp,"

No way. Was she actually going to send me to be with people of my own age? Apocalypse.

"You've never met her before, so I was wondering if you wanted to spend the summer with her on her Camp?" my mum suggested. I thought this through. What if I hate her? Then again, I could just hang out with the other teenagers there instead. Oh this could actually be quite awesome. I wouldn't have to do stuff around the house, or baby-sit Noah or worry about bumping into Zoë. Oh yeah, that last one made up my mind.

"Go for it," I said grinning. "Tell me about Aunt Lou Lou,"


	3. Not A Summer Camp

I was packed and ready to go. Mum couldn't drive me all the way there because of work and Dad had no clue where on Earth it was, he was still getting used to driving on the correct side of the road, never mind finding out where some random camp was. But mum said there was a bus that drove directly to Camp Green Lake, as I was told it was called. I hoped I had brought enough clothes for three months. I'm sure I had. I'd emptied my wardrobe into my suitcase just in case. And brought every pair of shoes known to man. Good, I was ready and waiting on the side of the road and silently praying I wouldn't get too picked on for my accent. I tried out some American words in my head. It wasn't pavement, it was sidewalk. It wasn't nappies, it was diapers. It wasn't pounds it was dollars. That last one was important. A bus pulled up with the name Camp Green Lake, on the front. Perfect. I was about to climb on when the door opened and a man stepped out holding a shotgun. I instinctively stepped back in fear until I noticed his police badge hanging on his chest. He stared at me in shock for a moment and removed his sunglasses.

"You're not the one we're to pick up are you?" he asked with a hint if a Texan accent. God I loved Texan accents. I nodded and began to load my suitcases onto the bus.

"Jeez," I heard him mutter "I didn't know they were taking girls now," I looked at him peculiarly and thought he was making a crap joke. He pushed my back roughly up the stairs and I wondered what the hurry was. I thought I would be the only one to catch the bus as Summer Camp season had already begun. I was right, it was totally empty. I chose a seat near the middle of the bus and looked out the window, I hoped it would be a good view on the way there. Then I heard a 'click', turning to look at what it was I shrieked. My wrist was handcuffed to the seat in front of me! I looked at the 'guard' man in shock and he sniggered.

"What is this for?" I demanded.

"So you don't run away or jump out the window." he answered tapping his shotgun. I stared at him for three whole minutes before clocking on. Then I started laughing. I got it, it was the trick they were playing on the new kid. Very funny, scare them into believing it was a horrific place by sending a guard and handcuffs and everything. My Aunt Lou must be one joker, I hope she wasn't one of those unbearably happy 24/7 people. Oh god. The thought struck me hard. What if she was? Those camp leaders you see on television are all 'let's sing around the campfire' and stuff. I seriously would rather chew my own arm off than be related to someone like that. Oh god, now I'm scared. What if everyone there is like that? All…cheerful? By the time I'd convinced myself that things would be ok and everybody would be perfectly normal teenagers trying to spend loads of time with their friends, I realised we had been driving for about an hour. I was surprised, I knew I daydreamed, but I didn't think I was that bad. I looked at the 'guard' and grinned, he didn't return the gesture although I wasn't sure he'd seen it. You can never really tell where people are looking when they wear sunglasses.

"What's Camp Green Lake like?" I asked "Do we do like water skiing and stuff?" ever since mum had told me that it was called Camp Green Lake, I had been imagining all the water orientated activities we would possibly be doing. Sailing, swimming, fishing, boating, chilling by the lake, canoeing, all sorts of cool stuff. I was trying to make friendly conversation with the guard but he just frowned.

"A smart alec hey?" he asked "Don't worry, They'll soon seep all the life out of you once you're there a few days,"

I looked back out of the window. This joke was getting a bit strange, but I shrugged it off and rubbed my wrist. It was starting to get hot under the handcuff. I would have told him I was onto them but he was tapping the shotgun impatiently so I stayed silent.

After a few horrifically boring hours I peered out of the window and saw that we had left the cities and even the wildlife. All I could see was sandy desert. So I decided to learn my lines. Before we came to America I had been involved in a drama play and after much whining and complaining I finally persuaded mum to let me go back and be in the final performance. I reached into my bag and went to pull them out but the guard shot up and pointed the gun at me.

"Drop it now!" he shouted. I saw the driver look nervously in the rear view mirror at us.

"Wha-?" I started to ask but he swatted my bag to the floor with the tip of his gun. I looked at him as the contents spilled onto the ground of the shaking bus. "What were you looking for, a gun?" I asked sarcastically "Or a knife?" I raised my eyebrows expecting him to pick up my stuff. I couldn't because _someone_ had handcuffed me to the seat. He slowly but inspectingly repacked my bag and placed it down cautiously beside me with not a word of apology. It awkwardly reached back in by stretching my un-handcuffed arm across my stomach and inside it. Grabbing them I heaved them out before my slippery hands dropped them.

"Thanks for the hand," I muttered darkly to the guard. Reading through them I just didn't feel enthused, it made me kind of home sick, but I carried on, leaning against the window. When I had done the bus was slowing down. I wondered what for as I couldn't see a service station or any signs of life. Except for about seventeen billion holes in the ground. They were huge, nearly as big as me, and probably as deep, I shuddered as I thought how big the rabbits must have been to live in them. Then we came to a complete halt. I sunk low on my seat, ready to sleep and try to forget about huge, probably man-eating, rabbits.

"Get up," yelled the guard un-cuffing me. I looked at him in confusion.

"Why?" surely he wasn't going to make me go outside with the huge bunnies! I don't think I could run faster than a giant hopping rabbit.

"We're here," he said impatiently "Get up." He dragged my arm and I stood hesitantly. He practically carried me off of the bus, I was so slow. The first thing that hit me when I left the bus was the heat. There was no breeze, not one, and the sun beat down mercilessly, stinging my eyes. Oh god I think I died and went to Hell. I then heard a few dull clunks. When my eyesight returned I saw that about fourteen boys were looking at me. I read the expression on their faces as pure shock, but I couldn't understand why. Some of them had even dropped the shovels they were, for some reason, carrying. I also noticed the complete lack of lake. Must be an ironic name. The buggers. So much for my excitmet at cooling off in the freaking Lake. The guard grabbed my arm and steered me towards a log building ahead of us. I didn't particularly want to leave, some of the guys were topless, tying those hideously orange boiler suits around their waists and abandoning t-shirts to the heat. But I moved as his grip tightened and we went into the cabin-like building. The breeze hit me with much appreciated coolness. I wondered where all the girls were. I figured they must be on some gender separated camp activity and the boys must have won. The guard basically threw me in front of an older guy, who was stylishly fashioning a cowboy hat. Not. He looked up from the desk he was lounging at and grinned what I assumed to be a friendly grin. He failed the friendly part.

"Didn't know we were taking in girls now," the guard muttered. The cowboy looked from the guard (who was looking at me like I was a criminal), to me who was rubbing my sore wrist, the cuffs had rubbed and left a red ring.

"Please tell me you didn't…" he turned to the guard, and pointed to me "Did you cuff her to the bus?" he asked in despair. Finally, someone who was as outraged as me to the cuffing.

"Yeah," the guard answered lazily, swigging a coke that was on the table. "Like all the rest. I ain't gonna treat her different cause she's a girl,"

The cowboy looked at him in disbelief for a second and then gestured my way. "Let me introduce you to Rachel Walker, the Warden's niece,"

The guard spat out the coke he had just drank.

Amazingly enough all over me. I was fuming

"What is it with spitting caffeine all over me people?" I yelled "Do I have like some sort of caffeine magnet or something?" I totally ignored the fact the cowboy guy had said my name wrong. I was Rachel Brookes not Walker.

"I'm sorry!" cried the guard, wiping the coke off of me. I stepped back.

"I can do it myself," I said quietly. The cowboy was smiling wickedly.

"I hope he didn't treat you too bad," he said. I raised my eyebrows.

"No," I answered "I can take a joke," I said good humouredly. Cowboy dude looked strangely at me.

"Joke?" he asked in his rough Cowboy voice

"Well yeah," I said half laughing "You know, on the new kid. Ha-di-ha." I said still smiling. I was getting odd looks from the two men in the room. A look of understanding graced their features and Cowboy spoke up.

"What did your Mother tell you about this Camp? Everything?" he inquired.

"Er…" I thought. She hadn't said anything. Except the fact that it was a Camp. I had been too eager to get here to question it. "Nothing actually," I admitted. Cowboy's eyebrows shot up. Ok I really needed to find out his name. He sucked in breath as if he had a long tale to tell.

"Okay," he said "Maybe I should explain first of all of your predicament," he looked at the guard and thanked him. He looked disappointed as if he wanted to stay and hear Cowboy's story, but left all the same.

"You and the Warden, that is your Aunt Lou, are the only two females at this camp,"

My jaw dropped. The joke was still in full swing right? I wasn't in the mood right now for it however. That bus had been awful, hot and sticky, and scary when I had been threatened at gun point. I just wanted to shower, rest and have some nice camp food like sausages or marshmallows and melted chocolate. My mouth began watering at the thought. I imagined camping out under the stars and found myself slipping from the conversation.

"Okay," I said "I give in. You got me. You got me good. But now we've all had a laugh at the newbie may I please have a shower and a tent and a marshmallow?" I asked as kindly as I could. Cowboy laughed.

"'Fraid there's no joke here." he said "You ain't at no Girl Scouts Camp. This is a boy's juvenile detention camp,"

I paused. This guy was actually serious, he wasn't lying, he wasn't joking. Had I been sent to a boy's juvenile detention camp by my own mother? My god. She really _did_ hate me

"You're serious aren't you? You are actually telling the truth!" I cried. He nodded.

"We did wonder why Chloe was sending her only daughter here, but we didn't ask. The Warden can be-" he stopped, thinking he had said to much. I sighed. I'd have to ring mum and tell her to collect me. Bloody fool, who did she think she was sending me here? Was she trying to get me raped? Did she want a grandchild so badly? Crazy woman, I mused. Cowboy shrugged and held out his hand.

"I'm Mr. Sir," he said. I burst out laughing.

"You're who?" I asked still giggling, taking his hand and shaking it. His grip tightened.

"Mr. Sir," he growled again. "That's what the boy's must call me and I expect you to do the same,"

"Okay," I answered smiling "Mr. Sir," I added sniggering. I saw his mouth twitch and it was as if he was almost smiling.

We went outside, he was to introduce me to my Aunt Lou. I thought about it and decided i'd have to stay for a couple of hours. It would be rude not to and it could be good to get to know my Aunt. As we left the cabin I noticed a load of old battered tents. I quietly prayed I wouldn't have to live in one of them. Then I noticed we were surrounded by boys. I was confused until Mr Sir's (snigger) words flashed in my mind

_You and the Warden, that is your Aunt Lou, are the only two females at this camp_

I must be the first girl they have seen for a while. Even _I_ was bound to look pretty hot, and that would need one hell of a deprival from females to make me look good.

"Scram!" Mr Sir shouted at them. Some of them jumped at his voice whilst others just lazily sauntered off, looking back. I done the same as Mr. Sir led me away, some of them were still topless. In England it was never really hot enough for lads to walk around with no tops on. So i was enjoying this

"The Warden lives in that log cabin there," Mr. Sir pointed to a log cabin a bit in the distance. "I guess you'll be staying there during your stay." We dodged a hole and I yelped in fear. I had forgotten about the giant rabbits.

"What…What live in the holes?" I asked uncertainly, cautiously peering into one. It seemed perfectly rounded and they all looked the same size.

"Oh anything," grumbled Mr. Sir, puffing a bit while we walked and spitting sunflower seeds out of his mouth and into the holes. "Rattlesnakes, scorpions. Yellow Spotted Lizards."

"Let me guess, they're pink and purple with green stripes?" I asked feeling a bit more confident that no giant rabbits were going to strike a surprise attack on me every time I stepped foot out of the cabin. But ignored the rising fear that ignited when he mentioned scorpions.

Mr. Sir looked at me "Eleven spots, exactly, each. But you don't want to get bitten by a yellow-spotted lizard. That's the worst thing that can happen to you. You will die a slow and painful death." he said.

Great, it just gets better, the giant rabbits seemed pretty friendly right about now.

"So what's with the holes?" I asked trying to keep my voice steady and acting as if I heard stuff like 'you will die a slow and painful death,' all the time.

"It's the punishment. The criminals must dig a five by five hole each day. If you take a bad boy and make him dig in the heat every day, it will turn him into a good boy," he said. Okay, I won't ask anymore questions, I just keep getting more and more scared of this place. Deadly lizards, female deprived criminals, digging in sweltering heat. Now all I expected was for my Aunt to be some crazy loon who uses scorpions to brush her hair or something.


	4. Aunt Lou and The Plan

Close.

I was close.

She paints her nails with rattlesnake venom. That's normal. Mind you it makes a spectacular colour. This amazing shimmering scarlet red. I may have to steal some from her before I leave. Apart from that she seemed dead nice. She had red hair which she wore in a plait that snaked down her back, and cowgirl attire. Like I said about Mr. Sir; stylish. She explained about the camp and how she was the all feared Warden.

"…just a pretence I uphold to keep the boys in line,"

I nodded politely as she told me about herself and how her and my mum got along when they were kids.

"So Rachel," she said in her amazing Texas accent "What have you been up to in your life?" she asked kindly. I paused, god my life was boring. I didn't have anything incredibly interesting to tell her, except maybe…

"Well I flooded a coffee shop with milk on my first day of work," I said munching on a cheese sandwich she had made me. She looked surprised for a moment and then smiled.

"Well then, I guess you'll fit in fine here then," she said "You'll get along great with the other criminals," she smiled. I hesitated for a moment, but I longed to ask her.

"Why didn't my mum tell me that this wasn't a summer camp?" I asked eventually. Aunt Lou studied me for a moment then shrugged,

"You probably wouldn't have come if you knew what it really is," she suggested.

"But why did she want me to come in the first place?" I wondered out loud.

"Let us not worry about that for now Rachel. Now that you're here, how long are you planning on staying?" I saw her eyes flick to my many suitcase which Mr. Sir and the guard had heaved in. But now I knew that instead of water skiing and chilling by the lake, I would be hanging with criminals and social workers I wasn't too thrilled about spending three months here.

"I don't know. I need to ring mum now that…the situation has changed, see what she has to say about it. After that who knows?" I worded my sentence carefully, I didn't want to offend my long lost Aunt after all this time and finally meeting her.

"Well," she said smiling and showing pointed teeth "If you ring her now the sooner we'll know," I nodded and walked outside to find some signal. Nearly falling into a hole I swore. That was close, I could've broken something.

Like my phone.

I dialled the home number and waited for it to pick up.

"Hello darling," answered my dad "How's camp going?"

"Put my so called mother on dad. She sent me to a detention Camp,"

"Oh I'm sure it's not all that ba-"

"_Put_ mum on," I demanded across his reasoning.

"Hello dear," my mother's voice said "how are things?

"Oh perfect," I answered sarcastically "The criminals are treating me _wonderfully_ and I discovered that if I don't get bitten by a deadly lizard I can always die from heatstroke and dehydration instead, so no worries there,"

"Rachel listen, you must under-"

"_What_ were you thinking sending me here? It's full of crazy ass weirdo's and arsonists!" I cried saying the first crime that came to my mind. "You simply _must_ come and pick me up this instant. I refuse to stay here any longer."

Stuff being rude to Aunt Lou, I was hysterical by now. Hearing my parents' voices in their nice air conditioned, lizard free home made me miss the finer, normal things in life.

"Listen to me Rachel. It's all for a good reason," she said. Oh this better be good, or else I was calling Childline.

"Oh do tell,"

"You know your Aunt and I had a minor fall out?" she continued. I snorted, doubting minor was the correct use of word here. "Well, it wasn't so minor. The family business we disagreed on. That was Camp Green Lake. Well kind of family business. Anyways, that camp means so much to her, and basically…I don't. If I turned up there and started trying to build the relationship that we both shredded into pieces, she'd probably hate me even more. Maybe even accuse me of trying to steal the business now that it is so successful." her voice was high pitched and hysterical, practically _forcing_ me to understand.

"Right, that's all good and fine, but where does the 'lying to your only daughter and sending her to an all-boys criminal Camp' fit into all this?" I asked, with a hint of accusation still present in my voice.

"Well…because I _so much _want to be on speaking terms with my sister. I thought she couldn't refuse her niece in her time of need," (AKA my boredom) "so I thought you could maybe put in a good word for me while you are there. And you know, by the time three months is up, you'll have convinced her that I'm a trusting, loving person who only wants her as a sister and not as a potential business partner."

"So…I'm like…your secret weapon or something?" I asked trying to clear the air. I heard uncomfortable shuffling on the other end of the line.

"Yeah," she finally answered. "So what do you say? Will you do this for me? Will your give your mother her only sister back?" she asked, nearly pleaded. I thought about it. Three months in a hot animal/criminal infested desert with nothing to do except paint your nails with snake venom and dig holes, or three months at home, with whiny parents, an annoying little brother and nothing to do. Ooh tough one.

"Put Noah on mum," I sighed

"Why?" she asked uncertainly

"Because if I'm not going to see him for three months I'd like to say goodbye," I said giving in. I'd missed seeing him as he'd been at summer school when I caught my bus here.

"Oh really? Are you going to do this for me?" she asked beyond happily. After five more minutes of this I had convinced her that I was _actually_ going to be a spy for her, I then spoke to Noah, then my dad, and returned back into the log cabin.

"Aunt Lou?" I called, she was nowhere in sight. Then she appeared in a doorway and smiled.

"Yes?"

"Change of plan. I'm staying. Is that still okay?" I asked. The plan would be down the pan if she had changed her mind.

"No of course not darling. You can stay as long as you wish. It'll be wonderful to have some female company." she answered sweetly. I inwardly sighed in relief, although I couldn't help thinking her sweetness was sarcastic "Now that you're staying, I'll get Pendanski to show you around." she said, and I wondered what a Pendanski was.

Turned out it was a very strange man, with, (surprise surprise) a cowboy hat on! He was jumping around and explaining things to me. I was half listening until he suggested I meet the campers. That got me nervous. I was bad enough meeting new _normal_ people. I didn't know how I'd cope with new _bad_ people. I took a deep breath and he brought me to the first tent. After a few more I was beginning to see a pattern emerging. He'd introduce me in the same way, they'd react in the same way, then he'd introduce them in the same way, then they'd react again in the same way. He stopped outside another and looked at me with what I imagined was his 'proud look' and said.

"I'm the counsellor for this tent. These boys are under my charge," he smiled a goofy grin. "They may not be perfect, but they're mine," I inwardly puked. How ridiculously soft _was_ this guy?

"Okay," I said in a fake cheery voice. He was none the wiser.

"Welcome to D tent," he said pulling back the tent flap. "The D is for Diligence!" he called happily.


	5. D is for Delerious

We seemed to have walked in on an argument. A Hispanic boy was arguing with a larger African-American boy. Señor Spanish had snatched a piece of paper from the other and was about to shout something. A Caucasian boy chewing on a toothpick stood and stared, his mouth open, toothpick now on floor.

"Whoa X!" he said "You weren't joking! Unless we _all_ got sunstroke!" he exclaimed. The heads of the boys turned and one smirked. I recognised him as one of the boys who had dropped their shovels when I got off the bus. He had thick dirt covered glasses on and was looking me up and down. I inwardly cringed, subtle, real subtle, mate.

"This is Rachel" Pendanski said "She's-"

I had decided I was going to have some fun in this hell hole. And as these were Pendanski's lot. I thought they'd be first.

"A girl, yeah," I cut across him and used my best bored-bad-ass-who's-heard-this-a-million-times voice. "I'm here cause I killed a guy for touching my ass. So if you even dare…" It took immense strength and three years of drama lessons to keep a straight face right then. The smiles dropped off their faces and they looked at me in horror. I made my fatal mistake in glancing at Pendanski who was staring at me in shock. I burst out laughing.

"Wahay!" I said giggling "Your _faces_!". Pendanski sighed in relief and looked at his confused tent.

"Rachel is the Warden's niece. She's spending her summer here. Rachel this is-"

Okay, I had to cut across him again. He'd just annoy me.

"Okay can we please have a new system? Cause you'll tell me their names, which I'm bound to forget in the next two or three seconds and then there will be mutual groaning from the boys who'll then complain and tell me that their _real_ names are some king of crazy nicknames like Zulu Warrior or something which will baffle my already small mind. So why don't you just tell me their _nicknames_ to save time?" I asked in one breath. I was absolutely dead on my feet by this time, my brain and my body had stopped working hours ago and I was being told to sleep by both of them. Some pointless argument between juvenile delinquents and their counsellor was just wasting precious sleepy time, that I couldn't afford to miss. Crazy D tent counsellor guy looked at me and I smiled apologetically and said in my sweetest cutesy voice,

"I'm jut really tired from my long and brutal trip down here,"

Pendanski nodded.

"Round her little finger," I heard X-specs mutter.

"Okay, this is X-ray, Squid, Magnet and Armpit," Pen squirmed when he said the nicknames, but said them all the same. "Where's Rick- Zigzag, Caveman and Zero?"

"Wreck room," chorused the D tenters. Pen nodded and continued speaking although no one wanted to hear his droning, irritating voice any longer.

"Now I know Rachel isn't a Camper so to speak and she _certainly_ won't be staying in your tent. But I want you to look out for her and keep her safe okay? Treat her like another D tenter," he hesitated "only…better."

"Oh we'll look after her," X-ray (formally known as X-specs) said running his eyes up and down me again.

"No!" Pen almost shouted, but obviously he didn't, he was too soft to shout. "No," he calmed his voice down "Rachel is completely off limits to you boys, hear me? Or any others. If the Warden discover's any…" he paused and blushed.

"Any what Mom?" asked Mag enjoying seeing Pen squirm, though what the hell the 'Mom' bit was about, only god knows.

"Flirting or whatnot," he hissed, clearly embarrassed. "She will make you dig four holes a day. Hear me?" he warned. The boys shrugged the threat off and continued feasting their eyes on me. I sort of knew what a goldfish felt like. Being stared at by big faces pushing their noses up to the glass and tapping loudly, making horrendous echoes that were bound to give you headaches. A nice festive bleeping came from inside my pocket and I yanked out my phone and groaned. Battery. Nearly dead.

"Where can I plug this in?" I asked, shaking my phone. The boys burst out laughing. Personally I didn't quite see the funny side. "What?" I asked cautiously. "Is there nowhere…don't tell me…" realisation hit me. Hard. "No. Freaking. Way." I said "There's no plug sockets here is there?" I asked turning to Pen Man. He shook his head

"'Fraid not. But we entertain ourselves don't we boys? We have the rec. room which is full of-"

"You mean to say. That EVERYTHING I brought that was electrical, _won't work_?" I was livid and I was not going to let this go. No hairdryer, no straighteners, no phone, nothing. I'd be damned if I was going around with curly freaking hair all summer. No way. And exactly _how _was I going to keep in contact with my parents? "Were is tent M?" I asked. All I got was funny looks. "Well?"

"There is no tent M," answered Pen slowly. I spun to face him

"But, then where do you keep the murderers?" I asked in horror.

"We don't have any murderers Rachel," Pen answered in what I assumed was his 'dealing with the very slow' voice. I looked at him.

"Then where the hell am I meant to go if this gets too much? How am I going to get killed?" I ask. The boy who for some reason was called Magnum or something spoke up.

"Well I'm sure Lump will kill you if you nick his Backstreet Boys CD,"

There was a strange silence, maybe because I was looking at this crazy Spanish dude like he had sprouted a tail and just announced he'd decided to become a mermaid. To be honest, that would have made so much more sense than what crap he'd just said to me.

"_What_?" I hissed. "Backstreet…Lump…Kill me?" I said incoherently, trying to work out what he had just said to me. Then I started laughing. Like proper crazy laughing. They all thought I'd gone mad, but it all made sense now. And it was laughable.

"Are you okay?" Pen Man asked me with concern (I think). And I just cackled manically at him.

"I fine!" I shrieked "It's just…now I know!!" I was finding it hard to breath cause I was laughing so hard.

"You know what?" one of the boys asked me. I didn't quite catch who as my eyes were filling up with tears of laughter.

"It's okay. You don't have to pretend. I understand," I said pulling in air to calm me down. I was still getting funny looks so I decided to explain. "Okay so I died right! It makes total sense. I know when too! I was making this milkshake and it exploded…and it must have been an _eighty_ gallon container, not eight…and I drowned in the milk, and went to Hell! Cause right about then everything went wrong. I got fired…then sent here, and now I'm being told that if I steal a backstreet boys CD from a criminal, I'll get killed!" I started giggling again. Boy, Hell was funny! I should have drowned in milk _years_ ago.

"Dude, the chick's gone crazy," I heard Armpit say, but I didn't mind, he'd get punished. I mean we were all in Hell right? So a snide remark would get punishment.

"Which tent's Lumpy in?" I asked. Just to humour them, of course.

"A," Squid Boy said uncertainly, as if speaking would set me off again. I nodded, I'll remember that if I ever want to be murdered. Which, soon enough, I probably will. Even though I am already dead of course.

"Looks like the scorpions will be joining us," said Penny. I jumped a mile. Scorpions. Ugh. I'm absolutely terrified of the beasts. Painfully, horrifically terrified. In the corner of the tent one of them was scuttling around

"So will it be a slow and painful death from this Lump?" I asked eyeing the scorpion.

"Presumably," answered X-ray.

"Show me to Tent A!" I squeaked as it scuttled faster towards us "I need to see a man about a CD!"

"Would you like to meet the rest of the D tenters? They are in the rec. room," Pendanski said, totally changing the subject, probably in fear for my sanity. I sighed in relief and agreed. As I left I heard the call of

"Bye hottie," from who I thought was X-ray. I calmed down a bit

"Killed a guy for touching my ass," I casually sang back to him and I heard sniggers.

"They seem…non-violent," I said. To be honest, when I found out that this was a detention Camp, I had been expecting murderers and rapists to be running riot around the place. But they seemed just like normal guys. Probably just caught robbing stuff or in a fight. I mused over my meeting with all the campers I'd met so far. Some of them were quite cute. I actually could find myself getting to like Camp No Lake. Specially if they made a habit out of going around topless. I thought about the D tent boys. Toothpick and Señor Spanish were quite nice looking. X-specs wasn't bad in a sort of weird way. I wondered if there was any more hotties in the remaining D tenters. Pen Man showed me to a run down building which had _Wreck room_ scrawled on the door.

"This is going to be fun isn't it?" I asked Pendanski smiling. He forced a grin and just said.

"Keep your guard up," and ushered me through the room.

What felt like three years of near groping, wolf whistles and many _many_ threats from Pen, I found myself in font of three campers. A _teeny_ _tiny_ little boy with a puff of black curls on top of his dark head. I grinned when I saw him, he was so adorable I nearly hugged him. Another was a medium tallish guy with brown hair and a kind trusting face. He seemed pretty genuine. The last was a tall guy with amazingly wild blonde hair and electrical eyes.

"This is Ricky-"

I put my fingers in my ears and started singing loudly to drown out his voice

"Don't be telling me no names that'll go off and confuse me!" I said in my best Texan accent. The three boys laughed as I took my fingers from my ears. I didn't know what was up with me today. It must have been the heat. And the fact that I was dead.

"Okay," Pen said slowly "This is Zigzag," he gestured to Crazy Hair "Caveman," The Brunette "and Zero," Teeny Tiny. "do you wanna know why they call him Zero?" Pen said chuckling.

"No," I said with not a scrap of interest in my voice whatsoever and I even shook my head, but he ignored me.

"Cause that's all that goes on inside here," he ruffled Teeny's awesome hair "zero!"

I looked at him in astonishment "What?" I asked in disbelief "You can't say that!" I protested. Teeny looked up at me with bright hopeful eyes.

"I can say whatever I want about these boys. Because I am here to teach them the path of right," he said hooking his thumbs into his belt hooks, bounced on his toes and looked around the room with a stupid grin on his face. I narrowed my eyes, he was worse than Mr Ugly Grey Suit, and that git spat coffee on me. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Zero/Teeny smile at my obvious dislike for Pen. Good, at least I could have a bitch about him to someone who'd agree. Crazy Hair, or Zigzag as Pen The Asshole had called him was staring at me with some strange interest. It wasn't a look like the other guys had given me (an undressing-with-the-eyes look) more of a calculating look. To try and figure out how my mind worked. I returned his gaze confidently.

"Tell you about the lizards?" he asked widening his eyes.

"Yea, you get bitten, you die," I answered simply.

"You speak funny," he said "Are you here to spy on us?" he mocked my English accent with the last of what he said.

"Er...thanks," I said sarcastically "No I'm not. I'm here cause…I came to see my Aunt," it was only a slight hesitation but he picked it up. His eyes widened again

"Liar. I can tell these things. Acute vision!"

"And paranoia," added Caveman. He smiled warmly at me "Don't worry, he tried to freak me out on my first day too," this guy seemed so nice. I wondered what he was doing at a place like this. I smiled back and looked into his dark eyes, he blushed . Okay, I had to remember that these guys hadn't been around girls for a while, so I had to take it super slow. I inwardly groaned, this was going to be hard, I was beginning to miss _The Bean Bar_. Oh life up on earth seemed so blissful right now.


	6. First Day At Camp

I snuggled down into my bed inside Aunt Lou's cabin. I had been looking forward to this ever since I got here, apart from the shower which I had just had. I lay there smiling at myself. I loved bed, it was so comfortable and cosy. Nothing could disturb me here. I rolled over and fell to sleep.

ToooOoooooOooooot!!

A shrill, disgusting, horrendous shriek of a noise woke me up what must have been only moments after I had fallen asleep. I screamed and fell out of bed. The noise that came out of my mouth was enough to wake any campers who had fallen back to sleep. Aunt Lou came skidding in wearing just one of her cowboy shirts and girl boxers. I closed my eyes and put my hands up

"Eeew!!" I complained.

"What?" asked my aunt still in panic mode "Why did you scream? Is everything okay?" she gabbled.

"Yeah, yeah," I said distractedly picking myself up from the floor "What _was_ that noise?"

"It was the alarm. It's time to get up," she said smoothing out her hair.

I gawped at her. Time to get what? Did she say _up?_ No, she must be joking. I rubbed my eyes sleepily and yawned, my heart still hammering from the fright of that shriek.

"What's the time?" I asked.

"4.30," she answered automatically. I burst out laughing. God this girl was funny. 4.30, for me there was only one 4.30 in the day and that was in the afternoon, not some ridiculous time in the morning.

"You're tired," she said in response to my laughter. "You should go back to sleep," she suggested. I climbed back into bed still laughing, but that was soon replaced by my snores.

When the sun beat too strong for me to bear against my shut eyelids, and I was just losing grip on the last thread of sleep I had been clinging on to, I decided to wake up. Groaning to myself about how much less tired I would be if Aunt Lou had kept me awake at 4.30. Then I froze, one leg in my trousers, did I dream that? Was that real? Maybe I was dreaming it all, but when I stepped outside I saw nothing, no one, apart from the odd puffs of sandy soil floating into the air, which I guessed to be the boys digging their 5 by 5 hole in the distance. I sighed, wondering how early they had started, if the alarm went off at 4.30. I shuddered, was I going to be awoken by that everyday for the rest of my holidays? I groaned, 4.30, she must have been pulling my leg. Walking the only direction I knew, I found myself back outside where I met Mr Sir (and had coke spat on me). Speaking of Mr. Sir, I saw him loading up a white truck.

"Oh good afternoon," he said sarcastically "Did her highness have a good sleep?"

I looked behind me. Her highness? The Queen was here? Since when? And why would she come to a crappy desert in-

Oh.

He meant me.

Smarmy Git.

"Why yes I did thank you," I said curtsying. "Why? Did you have to get up at that ludicrous time of 4.30? To that unbearable _scream_ of an alarm this morning?" I asked in interest. He narrowed his eyes and didn't reply.

"What are you doing?" I said peering into the truck. It had a water tank in it, and tons of paper bags.

"It's lunch. The boy's have got to eat."

"It's _lunch?_" I asked. I thought he was joking about the good afternoon part. He nodded. I sighed and my stomach rumbled.

"Get in," he ordered "I'll take you to see the Lake," he joked as I climbed in eagerly. I couldn't wait for the air con to come on to cool me down. As we drove Mr. Sir spoke

"So the ponce tells me you think you're dead."

I couldn't help but snicker

"Yeah. It just seems to awful to be real," I answered.

"Believe me," he growled "Its real," I looked at him and he was scowling. I couldn't imagine why anyone would work here willingly. There was something more keeping him here. Maybe a sordid affair with Lou? Or Pen Man? Oh now _that _would be entertaining. He looked at me while I giggled to myself.

"Are all Englishwomen mental?" he asked and I snorted. "Here we are, Tent D."

Bollocks.

I'd vowed to avoid this lot until they forgot how slightly crazy I was. No such luck there then. As we pulled up, the boys lined up at the truck. X-ray was first, and Zero last. Ooh this looked like the pecking order. I knelt on my chair and leant on the back of it to face them as they got their canteens filled with water. They didn't notice I was there until X-ray passed me and stopped.

"Hey! It's the crazy chick!" he called. They turned their heads towards me and smirked. All of them. Well, most of them. Zero's lips twitched a little, I thought he may have forgotten how to smile. Zigzag narrowed his eyes at me a bit, but then he smiled too. Hmmm, he looked quite fine when he smiled, sort of brightened his dirty face.

"So are you in the leader then?" I asked X-ray. He puffed out his chest and a proud smile came onto his face.

"Yeah,"

"Well," I said feeling more confident in the safety of the water truck, "You know I like a guy in charge," I said teasingly. His eyes widened, then he leant again the truck in what he thought must have been a sexy stance and I stifled a giggle.

"Is that so?" he asked smoothly. I nodded covering the lower half of my face, by scratching my nose, so he couldn't see I was trying so hard not to laugh.

"Hey X!" called Magnum. "Stop hogging the girl! We all want a fair share!"

I was offended. So I was just some toy to be shared amongst the boys? Not likely.

"In case you haven't noticed," X-ray yelled back "I _am_ the leader of this group," my cue to snort "and if anyone's entitled to her. It's me," he turned back to me and, once again, looked me up and down "And I don't share," he added in his 'sexy voice'. I couldn't help it, it was all too corny, I burst out laughing again and he looked startled. I smiled back at him.

"I'll think about it," I said chuckling, and he walked back.

"Rachel give the boys their food," Mr. Sir said.

No, not said, demanded.

"Excuse me?" I asked. All heads turned my way, I didn't care. He could at least say please. Mr. Sir raised his eyebrows at me and I raised mine back. His went up further up and so did mine in response. This looked like it may take a while so I spoke up.

"Look, they won't go any higher," I explained pulling my eyebrows to demonstrate that they did in fact have a limit to their height. Some of the lads snickered. "So can we try that again?" Mr. Sir looked momentarily shocked, then he regained his composure.

"I do have a name," he said. Probably assuming I should call him by it when I addressed him.

"Therefore I presume you also have manners?" I shot back. I hated rude people, there was just no point. What extra pains did it take to say Please, or You're Welcome? Exactly, none. It seemed to blow him.

"I will be addressed as Mr. Sir, or not spoken to at all!" he yelled in my face. Whoa, anger issues.

"And _I _won't be ordered around like a Criminal! I'm your freaking boss's niece! You should be sucking up to me if anything. Not treating me with no respect." I said feeling hurt. Why was he shouting at me? I only wanted the stupid Ass to say Please, if he couldn't do that they he seriously had a problem.

"Right! You can walk back!" he threw out seven paper bags from the truck.

"_What_?" I asked in disbelief.

"You heard. Get out Missy. I ain't having no smart ass posh twat in my truck. You ain't better than me. You ain't _Higher_," as he sat in the drivers seat, he gave me a look that made me scramble out of the car as fast as I could. As the truck drove away he threw an eighth paper bag out too. For me. The eighth criminal in D Tent.

Oh Joy.


	7. Abandoned And Left For Dead

I just watched the truck drive away until it was a far away dust cloud. I plonked myself down on the dirt and muttered

"Asshole," to myself, ignoring the stares of the boys as long as I could "What?" I snapped when I could take it no more. They continued looking. "Look. I'm not a circus, or a freak show, and I'll have to start charging if you keep looking at me like that."

"I'd pay to look at that," Armpit muttered. I groaned. I was so getting raped. I could just tell. I felt the dust move as one sat beside me. I tried to ignore it the best I could until the whole tent was sitting by me, creating a circle. They ate as I drew pictures in the sand. Like hell I was going to get up and get that bag of 'food' Mr. Sir had thrown at me. That would mean he had won. And he so hadn't won. Squid leant back on his hands when he had finished and squinted at me.

"Yes?" I asked, not looking up from my drawing. It was a picture of Mr. Sir with a spade through his head.

"You got a boyfriend?" he asked in his Texan drawl.

"Nuh-uh," I said simply. I could practically feel their eyes lighting up. "Haven't exactly had time to meet any guys yet." I answered.

"So what's the Warden _really_ like? I mean behind closed doors?" X-ray asked. I looked up into his face and shrugged.

"Dunno. Only just met her,"

They exchanged glances.

"Okay," I said in response to that reaction "My turn. What brings you all here to this fine Camp?" I grinned.

As they told me their crime, I was secretly waiting to find out Caveman and Zero's. As the quietest two of the group I was trying to guess. When Magnet had just finished telling me he'd stolen a puppy, I turned to Caveman.

"I stole I pair of shoes," he mumbled. I raised my eyebrows and turned to Zero. He just looked back at me with big brown eyes.

"What did you do?" I asked.

"Nah don't bother about him," Armpit answered hitting my arm. "_He_ won't talk to ya."

I nodded, okay, so Zero was mute. So much for my bitch about Pendanski, well, I'm sure he could still _listen_ to my complaints.

"What's the deal with the names?" I asked. X-ray shrugged.

"Just always been a Camp tradition." he answered, he had been the one to sit next to me first. I must have been right, he was the leader, as the others followed him.

"Okay," I answered glancing around the group, feeling self-conscious with all eyes on me. I felt like I was on a reality TV show, with cameras watching my every move. "I feel like cameras are watching me," I said laughing nervously. Eyes widened and then Magnet smirked.

"You and Ziggy'll get along just fine," he said smiling. The others nodded in agreement. I looked at Zigzag, he was looking at me through ice blue eyes, that practically sparkled statically. I looked around the group and wondered what on earth they were on about, until Zigzag spoke up.

"The place is bugged, " he said. "The Warden, she's got cameras and microphones everywhere,"

There was a long silence. And Zigzag looked back to the floor, shifting dirt.

"Well that's an interesting theory," I said after a while "But…um there's no like, TV or transmission rooms or anything," I said

"You would say that," he mumbled and got back into his hole. I looked after him wondering what he meant, but shrugged as the others followed suit by climbing into their own holes, and started digging again. All that could be heard was that satisfying 'shink' of metal hitting hard sand. I lay back complaining

"It's so hot!" I moaned. Magnet's voice drifted out from his hole in a reply of

"At least you don't have to dig in it,"

"Yeah but you have the shade of your hole," I shot back.

"Then sit in a hole," called X-ray. I smirked

"Nah. The giant rabbits might get angry and attack,"

The sound of digging abruptly stopped and seven heads popped out from their holes.

"What?!" came cries of confusion.

"Carry on," I said waving my hand. I felt like Cleopatra, ordering her slaves to build a giant monument of herself, dedicated to her. Ooh, now that would be cool.

"Build me taller!" I said "_Don't_ make my nose that big!" I ordered my slaves.

I heard someone mutter

"Are all girls this crazy? I can't remember it's been so long," I guessed it was Squid.

"God knows. Ask caveman, he's the one who's been here the shortest.," Armpit answered. My stomach rumbled and I started moaning again.

"I should have eaten that food," I said glancing over to it, being ravished by hideous, ugly, terrifying scorpions...

"Yup," answered a digging guy. Thanks for the sympathy. I closed my hands around my throat. I didn't even have any water to keep my mind off of food. I made small chocking noises to keep me preoccupied.

"What the hell are you doing?" asked a voice. I froze, hands around my neck, mid choke and turned to see who was speaking to me. Zigzag.

"I'm…err…I'm bored," I answered, ignoring the dryness that was slowly but surely gathering in my throat. he rolled his eyes and threw his canteen at me. I sat up and looked at it as if it was a two headed dog.

"Drink it," he said. I was beginning to smile in thanks when he added "Or else you'll die and attract the lizards. We don't need them any closer than they already are,"

I frowned and took an unnecessarily long gulp form his water, glaring at him all the while.

"Take you own sweet time," he said sarcastically. Afterwards I chucked it into his hole

"Thanks," I muttered. In spite of his reasons for giving me the water, he had still given it to me. Water is life out here. And he had given me life.

"Don't mention it," he quietly replied. Oh God this kid was weird. One minute he'd be all 'here take my water,' then he'd be 'cause you're rotting corpse will atract dealdy lizards' and then he was all 'oh it's no problem darling pie, hollor if you need me,'

I took up my general groaning until Squid poked his head out irritably

"Why don't you just walk back if you're so miserable here? Its not as if you have to stay."

"Ah…yes…well I kinda, don't know my way back." I admitted "I was…" I hesitated, did I really want to tell them? If I wanted to get back then yes. "…going to wait until one of you had finished and then walk back with you," I said holding my breath to see what they would say, or if they'd start some mad race to get their hole done first.

"Oh right," Squid replied in dismay "That'll be Z then." I froze, he didn't mean Zigzag did he? I couldn't stand going to him for help, he'd probably push me down a hole on the way back. I looked at Zigzag and he still had a long way to go. I was confused for a bit. Then I glanced over to Zero's hole, and my jaw dropped. He was practically finished, and dirt was flying out of his hole a mile a minute. Jeez he dug fast

"Can I walk back with you?" I asked, only expecting a nod or at least a recognition of my presence. But no. Only digging. "Zero?" I asked before I realised I had yelled quite loud. There you go, the frantic digging stopped and he looked over the side of his hole. He was so small that you could only see the top of his head and a bit of his eyes. He nodded and went back to digging. As the boys dug and I waited for Zero to walk me back, I rolled up the legs of my jeans and let the sun soak into my skin. I felt a shadow across my face and opened one eye. Zero was standing above me, shovel in hand. Presumably ready to go. I stood

"Bye D-tent!" I called as Zero and I walked back towards the camp. I didn't want to walk back in silence so I stared talking. Not expecting or wanting him to answer (not as if he could)

"...so then I just stood there and watched the milk spread out into the shopping mall," I sighed. I glanced at Zero and aw he was listening intently, anticipation in his eyes. He nodded as if to say 'Go on,"

"Needless to say was fired. Zoë went slightly mad," I shook my head at the memory "and that's why I'm here. I got so bored at home, Mum sent me here to meet Aunt Lou," I looked around and realised we were already at the camp. Damn. I had meant to pay attention so that I knew my way back. I had been yapping so much I hadn't even noticed. I smiled at Zero and a shadow of a grin touched his lips.

"I reckon you're the smartest kid here Zero," I said sincerely looking around at the gaping boys who walked past us. He looked at me quizzically. "I mean, if I'd been sent here and treated the way you guys are treated, I'd keep to myself too. These guys wear their feelings out on show," I shook my head to show my disagreement with that "It shows a weakness, and a weakness is the last thing you want around here." I looked around the Camp "Hell, I didn't even know places like this existed." I admitted "So are you going to the wreck room or the tent?" I gestured to each as I said them, expecting him to reply in the same way. He just stared at me.

"You think I'm smart?" he said in the quietest voice in the world. I gawped at him, doing my best fish impression.

"Wha-bah-you speak?" I asked in disbelief. Since when? He looked at me with a hurt expression as if I was trying to be funny. "No!" I tried to mend it "I meant that I thought you were mute!" oh god, I was making it ten times worse "No! Right I'm being positively, deathly serious now. When Armpit told me you wouldn't talk, I thought he meant you _couldn't_ talk." I explained. Slowly, his face crinkled into a smile and I grinned back, relieved "And yeah, I do think you're smart. Quiet people aren't necessarily stupid." I said in answer to his question. He walked towards his tent, then stopped and spun around

"Do you…?" he blushed as he spoke. I grinned, he looked even sweeter when he blushed. I nodded my head.

"Yeah, sure," Well what else was I meant to do? Brave the wreck room without a gun or a Pendanski to fight through for me? Not likely. And anyways, I need to give Aunt Lou time worry about me. Then Mr. Sir would be in for it. How did he know I hadn't died from dehydration? Or been killed by one of the boys? So I sat on Zero's bed with him. I suggested we played noughts and crosses, but he said he'd never heard of it. So I taught him and _then_ we played. He won. Twice. The other D-tenters arrived quite a bit later, in singles and doubles. They all stared at me, sitting on Zero's bed, learning my lines. X-ray raised his eyebrows, Zigzag glared a death glare at me and Caveman gave Zero the thumbs up. I pretended to ignore it all, concentrating on the words before me, letting the dialogue soak into my memory. All of a sudden Pen came rushing in, panting and wheezing from the obvious marathon he clearly just sprinted and won. He held his side, breathing heavily.

"Have you…seen-?" he stopped as his eyes swivelled around the tent and fell on me. He puffed out an incoherent sentence which I made him repeat.

"Mr. sir…D-tenters…left you," he managed. I casually nodded and turned back to my lines.

"Where have you been?" he asked after five whole minutes of recovering from his heart malfunction.

"With these guys," I gestured to the tent mates as I idly turned the page.

"But why didn't you come back?" he asked. I sighed, how was a meant to be star of the show if I couldn't concentrate enough to even learn my god damn lines?

"I _am_ back," I stressed. Pen opened his mouth but I angrily pulled my script up to block him from view. I think he got the message because he just said

"Go back to the Warden's cabin when the dinner bell rings," and left. I rolled my eyes at the other boys and they smirked.

"Like I said," X-ray said "Round your little finger," he looked thoughtful for a moment and then spun to face me "You could get anything you want, anything _we_ want!" he exclaimed.

"And why would I do that?" I asked feigning innocence.

"Ha ha," he said sarcastically "You could you know. Sneak stuff from the Warden's personal stash. I bet she has all sorts."

"Crisps," Armpit put in

"Coke!" Squid added.

"Er... what's in this for me?" I asked. X-ray smiled

"Oh I'm sure we could do you a few favours. I'm sure Zigzag is a fairly fine companion," he said jokingly. Zigzag stood up, he was so much taller than X-ray.

"I'm going to the wreck room," he muttered angrily and strode away. Sorry I repulse you so much, I felt like saying, but I didn't think that was too smart as he'd been sent here for setting fire to his school

"Why does Zigzag hate me?" I asked the rest of the tent, trying not to sound as if it bothered me too much.

"He doesn't _hate_ you, he just doesn't trust you," Caveman answered quietly after a short pause. I looked at him quizzically and when no one else bothered with an explanation, he sighed and carried on. "Last night, when we were…" he blushed "talking about you," he finally said. "he kept…mentioning that you must be a secret agent, a spy for the Warden, so you can tell her things about us."

I froze. That's what he thought? Then why did he smile at the water truck, and why did he bother to give me some of his precious water?

"Do…do you all think that?" I asked , uncertainly glancing around the tent.

"No!" X-ray insisted "Zig's a crazy man. Don't listen to him." he stood up, shooed Zero off of his own bed and sat next to me. I raised my eyebrows as if to ask what he was doing. He stretched out and lay down, arms behind his head.

"This is cool," he said "I ain't had a chick sat next to me for god knows how long. Must be six months now?" he glanced around the boys for confirmation but they all just shrugged. He laughed. "Yea, that's long."

I thought about it.

Six months.

That _was_ long. I wouldn't survive a week digging in this place. I was complaining about staying three months here and I wasn't even doing anything.


	8. The Truth of The Past

"Where the _hell_ have you been?"

Oh yes it _is _nice to see you. And it's so great that you _were_ so terribly worried about my welfare and safety whilst I was brutally and unjustly abandoned in the desert. Thank you for your immense sympathy and care.

"Well I _was_ left to fend for myself." I said picking up a warm apple. Eeew. Warm. I put it back. "I've not been here a day even. How was I to know my way back?"

Aunt Lou glared at me for a moment.

"Excuse me?" she asked. I froze. Whoa. She was one scary girl, when she said that I-

Hold it.

Wasn't that exactly what I said to Mr. Sir? Hell, no wonder he flipped. He must've _hated_ being spoken to by a kid the same way his boss spoke to him. Especially if I sounded as scary as Lou when I said it. She smiled at my shocked expression, glad to have silenced me. I narrowed my eyes. So she was going to be like that was she? When her employee had committed attempted murder hey?

"I said 'How was I to know my way back?'" I said, answering her question. She opened her mouth and then shut it again. A grin slowly spread across her face and she strolled up to me. I flinched as she raised her arm, but she rested it around my shoulders and guided me into the next room.

"You ain't nothing like your mom you know," she said Texan-like. Smiling affectionately down at me. "You remind me more of me than her,"

I just nodded, I was thinking of how to best plant the seed. Plant the seed of deception.

"What…what happened with you and mum?" I asked, giving her my innocently interested eyes. I think the unsure, angelic hesitation was a nice touch too. Oh those drama lessons were coming into use now. I felt her grip tighten slightly and she sat me down at the Breakfast bar, facing me. She toyed with something gold in her hands for a bit and then flicked her eyes up to me.

"Rachel me and your mum were not only sisters, we were the best of friend's." I could see faint freckles on her face, she was a really pretty woman, and I was so jealous of her long hair. "Our parents were obsessed with this Lake. Lived our whole lives out here practically," she saw my confused expression and sighed as if she was about to explain a long story to me "I haven't _always_ lived here. We used to drive down and dig then drive home. Chloe wanted more, she didn't want to be reminded of that everyday she woke. But I couldn't give up," her eyes flashed manically "I'll never give up. Not until I find it, not until I get my hands on that-" she stopped and shook her head. I wanted her to go on but she didn't. "We fought so many times, so many nights. We'd argue and scream at each other. She'd sneak out at night, meeting boys, and I'd dig. Our Granddaddy hated her for it, hated her. He'd disown her, not speak to us if we mentioned her. Then _I'd_ hate her for it." she looked at me "Breaking our family apart. She had no right. She had no respect. Then she packed off to England." Her eyes scanned my face. "I saw it you know, the moment you stepped inside, you weren't like her, you weren't trouble. Don't get me wrong Rachel, your mom may have been sweetness and light around you, but she's the reason we've never met before now." she sighed and stood. "You hungry?"

I nodded, my head whirring. Aunt Lou and mum digging? Did that mean _they_ were delinquents in this Camp at some time? Was it mixed gender at one point? What had my mum done to be disowned by her own 'Granddaddy'?

Holy sweet asparagus juice. My arm actually did dislocate from the socket for a moment there. The hand operated charger that I found in my bag (after seven minutes of frantic clothes throwing and suitcase emptying) was designed for seriously desperate people who don't mind only having one fully functioning arm for a couple of days. But this was important, I needed to talk to my mum. As soon as she picked up the phone I started the Questionnaire.

"What did you _do_?" I asked accusingly.

"Excuse me?" I laughed when she said this, sounding just like Aunt Lou.

"Aunt Lou has _some_ grudge against you. If you want me to clear your name I'm gonna be here for _twelve_ months, not three," I said.

"Oh would you? I mean, you don't _really_ need school do you? It's just a time filler between being born and getting work really. I mean look at me, I have no qualifications and-"

"Mum," I interrupted her. She'd been known to ramble on from time to time. "I'm not staying _one day_ longer here than I need to okay? I have been here twenty nine hours and already I'm exhausted,"

"Don't tell me she made you dig!" She screamed crazily.

"No, she did not make me dig. Speaking of which, you failed to mention you were a juvie camper! Left that little detail out hey?" I asked even more accusingly than when I did for the first question.

"Oh yeah, I left that out 'cause it _DIDN'T HAPPEN_! Where did you get that insane idea from. What bull has she been feeding you about me?"

"She ain't been 'feeding me bull', she said that you and her used to dig all the time when you were younger."

I heard her mutter "Jesus," down the phone. "I swore when I left for England that I'd put this behind me. Never speak of it again, as if it was someone else's life." there was a pause, in which she sighed and muttered other complaints to herself, but then she finally said. "It weren't always a Detention Camp. Me and Lou would have to dig for ever. Everyday after school Granddaddy would drive us out onto the lake and make us dig for hours until our hands bled with the pain. He was obsessed with it, needed to find Kissin' Kate's-" for the second time that night someone stopped because they had said too much.

"Yes?" I said urging her.

"Look, I don't like talking about it. It upsets me too much. You Aunt will tell you what she wants but she'll make it sound as if it's my fault,"

"She said you split up the family," I said quietly

"The family split itself up. We drove each other mad out on that Lake. The worst thing my mother could do was set up permanent residence there. Lou, thought it was brilliant, give the family an excuse for having holes there. Give the family a rest from _digging_ the god damn things. That's what we fought about. Lou wanted us to handle the business, the Camp, but I wanted more, I wanted nothing to do with that place anymore. England was only just far away enough." I could hear the hurt in her voice so I wished her goodnight and hung up. I was about to climb into bed when the memory of that hideous alarm going off at 4am or something, flashed through my mind. I knew I wouldn't sleep well with thinking about my family and their past, so I got out my lines. I fell asleep with them in my hands and in my head.

Okay so i was thinking. What do you think of me giving Rachel a nickname? And if so what could it be? i have a few ideas but suggestions will really help me decide whether i am on the right lines or not. Hope you can help me out. Thank-you my lovely readers. xox


	9. Getting Tough

Why are dreams so blooming strange? What do they have to do with anything?

At all.

Ever.

I am not in love with him! Dreams just lie, right out lie. He was an ass anyways, I had no reason to like him. I decided that I would wake up this time and see how the boys were early in the morning. I ignored the evil Mr. Sir and stood next to Pendanski. Although he was strange, oddly short and a bit of an asshole I felt safer around him than standing on my own. I got a grunt of an apology for

"…nearly killin' ya and all that," from Mousier Sir. I just smiled sweetly and gave him a Look when his back was turned. Pen handed me a flask and I looked at it in suspicion, opening the top and smelt it.

"It's coffee," he said nodding towards it "Wake ya up,"

I grimaced, not wanting to be reminded of coffee for the next few years. Nevertheless I'd have to face it someday and I'd rather do it in front of people who'd not understand or frankly care of my reaction, than in front of Zoë. Or Will. For the first time since I had been here the memory of him flickered through my mind. Slowly I sipped the coffee and made a face, not from the fact that the smell reminded me horribly that I'd totally screwed up and gotten myself landed here, but more the fact that it tasted like lukewarm mud.

"Hey Rach!" X-Ray called beckoning me over. I looked at Pendanski for conformation that it would be safe and he grinned a wonderfully goofy grin that I took as a yes. "You watching us dig again today?" he asked putting his arm around my shoulder. I shrugged, unsure of what I was doing that day.

"Myeh," I answered non-committedly. Squidy walked with us chewing on was looked like paper covered in syrup.

"She joining us?" he asked his mouthful of the foul papery food.

"Yeah," X answered for me. I looked up at him.

"Actually," I said "I was gonna check out the rec. room. See if I can work that TV,"

Magnum, who had joined us sucked in a breath "Nu-uh," he shook his head "Zig will kill you, that's_ his_ toy,"

I paused, I had not one doubt that Zigzag would kill me, but I didn't want to sit in the hot sun all day getting covered in sand and dirt, hanging with criminals. Then a thought struck me,

"If there's no electricity how does the TV work?" I asked suspiciously. They looked at each other and understanding struck them.

"Oh yeah!" Magnum said "Jeez! We didn't even realise!" I rolled my eyes

"Well done Magnum," I said sarcastically

"Magnet," X corrected me. I looked at him.

"What?" I asked in disbelief. I had been wondering, for a while, why he was named after ice cream "I've been calling him Magnum! Freaking Hell, Magnet makes a hell of a lot more sense!" I exclaimed. They laughed at me. Which I didn't think was particularly nice, but I wasn't about to complain. Not to them any rate. Before I knew it I had been subtly guided to where the boys were digging. I stood there, once again cursing my inability to notice where I was going.

"So you're not going to give me a nickname are you?" I asked hoping against the world that they would say no. I'd end up with some name like 'Sweetass' or 'The Chick' for three months. Then a thought struck me. They probably hadn't even thought of giving me a nickname until I spoke up. Way to drop yourself in it Rachel. I looked at them to see the smirk on X's face and Magnet smiling. I rolled my eyes.

"Forget I said anything," I muttered

"No no!" X-Ray said assuringly. "We'll give you one don't you fret!" he said as Penny showed him where to dig. He stuck his shovel into a crack in the dirt and pushed down hard. It split with ease, then he lay his shovel on the ground, and scuffed the edges of the dirt the shovel touched with his boot. He then turned it 90 degrees and marked that too. Then he started digging from the outside using the crack and the marks he had made. I watched him dig with ease, but slowly, pacing himself. He felt me watching and flicked his eyes up, stopping.

"What are you smiling at?" he asked, self-consciously wiping his face. I shook my head and sat on the ground. "how about…you walk back…with me this time?" he panted between shovelfulls.

"Okay," I said. I'd agree to anything for a quiet life. Talking of quiet, I heard one less 'shink' than before. I turned to see who had stopped and saw Zigzag looking at me, ankle deep in a hole. He was just looking, not glaring, not smiling, not staring with his crazy eyes. Just looking. I looked back, studying his face, wishing he would crack a smile or at least look away. His skin was fair but I noticed a hint of freckles scattered across his nose, his wild hair was even more untameable this early in the morning, and his eyes had lost some of their sparkle.

"You'll burn," he finally said in his low Texan voice. He then dropped his head to dig but his eyes flicked up one last time and I swore _I swore _he gave me a hint of a smile. I grinned, loving how much difference it made to his whole face. Shit. I had better stop thinking of how attractive the paranoid arsonist who hated me was. I sat down nervously away from Zigzag and X-Ray, and nearer to Armpit and Caveman. Bored and in need of entertainment I closed my eyes and thought back to my lines. The Crucible was an Arthur Miller play we had studied at school in the first year, the drama department discovered this and decided to turn it into a play, to 'help the understanding of archaic English language,' as Mrs Lockley had put it. Really she just wanted an easy screenplay for the drama's performance that year, and what better than to take it from the original book which the school had access to already? I, to the utter amazement of…well everyone, had managed to bag the part of Abigail Williams a female protagonist in the play. I was astonished, but uber happy and was determined to prove myself worthy of it.

"…Let either of you breathe a word, or the edge of a word, about the other things, and I will come to you in the black of some terrible night and I will bring a pointy reckoning that will shudder you…" I went over one of my favourite scenes in my head.

"What's she on?" I heard someone muter. Opening one eye I noticed that odd looks were being directed my way, for some unknown and probably uncalled for reason. I opened the other eye and raised my eyebrows in a questioning but not sarcastic way. I didn't want to anger the criminals now.

"Sorry?" I asked politely "Do I have a gerbil on my face that I'm unaware of?"

Silence.

Clearly I did. Just to be on the safe side I checked my face and it seemed to be rather rodent-free. I couldn't quite understand why they were all-

Oh.

I was talking out loud wasn't I? Now that would account for the strange looks I was getting. Right I think now would be a wonderful time to totally tone down the crazy, as at this rate I'd be digging alongside them as a cure for my insanity.

"Never mind," I said in a small quiet, and what I hoped, normal voice.

Freaking hell. I had been here a day and a bit and I was already regretting agreeing to this stupid plan of mum's. Aunt Lou probably didn't even _want_ anything to do with her sister. For all I knew I'd be here for years trying to persuade he to forgive my mum. If Mother had her way then I'd be permanently living here. Thank-god i had a dad who was at least half sane, or else I was totally screwed. Then I realised something. I had not had word from any of my friends from England. Well, if that's how they were going to be!

"What 's going on in that crazy head of yours Jinx?" X-ray asked. I shot up

_What_ did he just call me?

_JINX?_

"No way," I said "There is no way you're getting away with calling me that," I said

"What? I think it's perfect. I mean you've got to be pretty jinxed to be related to the Warden and, let's face it, to be the only girl in the whole Camp right?"

I didn't care about his reasoning, I had bad enough look as it is without him (oh so ironically) jinxing me further with a name like that.

"Don't care," I answered "You'll have to think of a hell of a better one than that mate,"

He sniggered at me but I was serious, if anyone else dared to call me Jinx I wouldn't hesitate to show them some of my Judo moves. Which to be honest were pretty pathetic, but if I made the noises and kicked around a bit they may back off.

Later that day I walked back with X-Ray as promised but didn't go into the tent. Instead I went into the cabin. Before I left X grabbed my wrist

"You're coming to see us later though," he stated, not asked.

"Er…yeah," I answered distractedly "I just gotta go change,"

He smiled and then let go. "Good girl. Something skimpy I hope,"

I was about to turn back around and thump him one, seriously I would have, if Magnet hadn't of smacked me on the back. Hard.

See the thing was, even though you couldn't tell just yet, Zigzag was right.

I had been sunburnt. Severely.

Two hours later and I was almost in tears. It hurt to walk, it hurt to sit, it hurt to lie. I looked at myself in the mirror. I had turned an attractive shade of boiled lobster red. Bloody Zigzag's nickname should be Jinx not mine, he's the one going around cursing people. I sighed. It was painful enough to simply move, and I really didn't feel like going to see the boys, especially the smug face of the curser when he found out he was right. But not going would, in the long run, cause me much more pain.

"Told you," X muttered as I tried to disguise my waddle as a stylish new type of walk. He elbowed Armpit in the side, smiled and stood, grabbing my wrist again and leading me to his cot. I winced slightly as I sat, the backs of my legs hitting the cot. I had put on jeans and a long top to hide most of the burn, and foundation was covering my face, the only thing that would give away my burn was if I showed the pain it was causing me.

"Whoa!" said Magnet as he came into the room, looking at me "X-Ray, you dog!"

I looked at X in confusion, he was smiling triumphantly and Mag was shaking his head in disbelief.

"What?" I asked "What?" Squid leant close and hissed in my ear

"X-Ray said you'd come here if he asked to get in on with you," he whispered.

I choked on nothing, but my own shock.

_What?_

I looked at X-ray and smacked his arm. The slap echoed painfully around the tent, but I seriously think I hurt myself more than I did him. He just grinned and laughed

"She so wants me,"

I stood as painlessly as I could and walked to the tent door.

"Asshole," I said leaving. I walked straight into a wall and fell over, nearly screaming with pain as my sunburn collided heavily with the floor. Ow. Freaking hell. Since when was there a wall outside the tent? I looked up and saw a crazy haired head looking down on me. Oh dear god I wasn't going to be given a break was I? That child was bloody solid, like I said, I thought I'd walked into a wall. I must have been pulling a face, probably the combination of pain and pissed-of-at-X-ness, because he pulled me up and asked

"What's the face for,"

I rolled my eyes. What did he care? He was the one who'd jinxed me.

"Your bessie mate's got it into his head that he's 'my man'," I said.

"Riiight," Zigzag said turning me around and pushing me back into the tent. I sucked in breath but ignored the pain.

"Hurrah!" X called, but Zigzag shot him a look that stopped him straight away and pulled me to his side of the tent, next to Squid and Magnet's cots. Magnet gave me an inquiring look and I shrugged, not quite understanding it either. He smiled shaking his head.

"Watch it here," he hissed to me "Bitch fight could be coming your way,"

I looked at him and smiled. What a strange little boy. I recalled back to my first day here, as I sat on his bed instead of Zigzag's, and the argument me and Pen had walked in on. I wondered what he had been yelling at Armpit about. He had been holding a piece of paper. A note maybe? A diary entry? A letter? The look n his face when he was holding the letter had me curious. When he turned his back, a towel slung over his shoulder I casually sifted through the crate at the end of his bed. He turned around and I pretended I was comparing the colour of my nail varnish against the colour of his backpack,

"What is with you?" he asked

"Nothing," I said as naturally as I could, "just, you know, checking the colour,"

He narrowed his eyes, probably wondering what on earth I'd taken. He must have been mouthing something to the other guys, but I took the opportunity to rummage through his crate.

"What are you doing?" Armpit hissed, looking at me as if I was mad "He'll kill you,"

"What were you arguing about?" I asked "What was on the paper,"

He looked confused for a moment. So I waited until Mag went to shower before aing up the snooping once more.

"You're mental," someone commented

"I just want to know what you were arguing about," I explained emptying the contents of his backpack into the crate.

"My god!" shouted Squid sitting beside me "You are so crap," he moved me out of the way and began filling the backpack up again "If you want to freaking nick something, you have to be discreet." he was arranging Magnet's things back into their original places "He has t not know you've been here,"

"Oh, coming from the thief who got caught," I said, pushing him out the way and rooting back through the crate.

"No, coming form the thief who got the goods," he wound his arm over my shoulder and waved a bunch of papers in my face. I grabbed them and grinned

"Fabby," I said snatching and scanning them

_José,_

_I said I'd stand by you, no matter what. I promised. You remember? I said I loved you and I would be with you through all of this. I do love you, you know that is true, but this is harder _

"I got caught because I'm a crap runner,"Squid's voice interrupted my reading. I looked up at him "Well, just in case you thought it was cause I couldn't steal stuff," he mumbled, looking back over my shoulder to read the letter. I laughed, I couldn't believe he cared if I thought he could steal stuff or not, and moved the letter out of his sight. It was one thing for me to read it, I was a girl, but tfor the guys to. They would s take the piss out of him, and it would be my fault. Despite myself, I found myself liking Magnet, not in the 'liking, crushing' liking, but he was funny.

…_but this is harder. It's ok for you, you don't have to deal with all the stares and whispers. You're away room all of that, with people like you. You probably have friends José, people who'll look out for you there, people to stick up for you. I have no one here, I had you, but now you're gone, and I have no one to stick up for me, people to look out for me. They disowned me you know, the day you were arrested I lost everyone. I'm proud of our relationship, I make it public that we're still together. Maybe that's my downfall, but I'm not ashamed, I'm not about to keep it a dirty little secret. Secrets are weaknesses, they can be used against you. You of all people know that José. I need support right now, I need people to lean on through this hard time. I can't have them and you. I have a choice to make here. And they're here and you're there, and I need people here. I'm sorry. It's the only way I can think of surviving the next year. It's for the best, and I know you'll understand._

_Love for the last time_

_Cass_

_X_

Shit.

Maybe I shouldn't have read that. No wonder he was protective of it. Poor Magnet, he must have been crushed.

Jesus,

Hold on a second, I think I just had an epiphany. These guys were real, they had feelings, even thought they were assholes sometimes (I glanced at X when this thought crossed my mind) it didn't mean they couldn't be hurt. I looked up from the letter and sighed. Armpit and Squid were waiting to hear what was in it. I stood and shoved it in my pocket leaving.

"Awww come on spill!" called Squid "What's his Mommy been saying?" I stopped and turned at the tone of his voice, it was full of bitterness and sadness.

"No," I said "it's private. I shouldn't of read it myself." I quickly glanced at the others expressions. Caveman was looking happy that I'd chosen to keep this a secret, Zigzag was looking at me as if he was seeing a whole different side of me, Armpit was looking disappointed and X-Ray was sulking. I shrugged and left the tent, seeing Magnet coming towards me smiling.

"Hey," he said. I just smiled sadly at him, he put on a brave face, it must have been hard for him to act as if nothing had happened to the other guys. Actually, looking closely, I could see the sadness lurking in his eyes. Sniffing, as if I was about to cry myself I hugged him, despite the roaring burning pain that sprang up when I did. I hated seeing people upset.

"Whoa!" he said, reluctantly hugging me back "Are you ok?" he asked as if it was I who was upset.

"No," I said sadly. "I read your letter," I broke away "It's just so sad," I whispered.

He looked at me and then burst into laughter.

"You're loco," he said. Maybe he was right, maybe I was. Maybe _that_ should be my nickname. I nodded

"Don't say nothing, especially to Zig, but I got sunburnt," I said, as if explaining the tears in my eyes to be of pain and not craziness.

"Ok," he said, nodding along with me. He is eyes dropped to the floor "Did you show the others?"

It took me a couple o seconds to realise he meant the letter.

"Oh, no," I took it out and gave it to him "I kept it in case they tied to look at it," I shrugged. He grinned, but then pointed his finger at me and put on a serious face

"Sworn to secrecy though? You're not allowed to tell," he said. I mimed zipping up my lips and smiled. His mouth twitched then he went back into the tent. I sighed. This was gonna be kinda hard, wasn't it?


	10. May I Borrow Your Gun?

I pulled out a white T-shit and grinned. It had an adorable smiling sun on it and Noah had bought it for me on my fifteenth birthday. He was so sweet, so I pulled it on. I shoved some sunglasses on and painted my nails gold. It was around about ten o'clock. I had slept in due to my total lack of sleep last night. True, I may had angrily screwed up my eyes when the fanfare screeched at me to wake up, and forced myself to go back to sleep, but I mean I wasn't exactly stressing myself to watch diggers. So I lay in and only rolled out of bed, yawning, at a time which I had to guess to be quarter to ten. This still was ridiculously early for summer holidays but miles better than half past bloody four. I had abandoned the wearing of shoes that had blistered my feet (stupid red Dorothy-like shoes) to go bare footed and I felt the sandy dirt crunching between my toes as I made my way around the Camp. So if it was ten o'clock, the boy's would no doubt still be digging. I ran my fingers across the shiny metal of my Aunt's car, quickly retreating from the action when my fingers began to scold. The dust was closing my throat and making it feel as if I'd swallowed a jar of sand.

Oh dear god.

Two hours later and I was sprawled across the bonnet, tongue lolling, arms flung out in surrender to the heat, a ridiculous song in my head.

_You are my sunshine_

_My only sunshine_

Someone walked past me and did a double take.

"What the freak Is wrong with you?" came the hoarse, yet slightly worried voice of Mr. Sir. I wasn't surprised, I must have looked like I was dead, draped over the bonnet like that. Slowly I sat up

"I'm okay," I said, my voice stupidly rough and scratchy. I coughed to clear it but it only hurt. He rolled his eyes.

"Don't bloody do that," he said, sighing in relief. I cocked my head. Was this my attempted murderer, worrying about me? "come on, you need something cold," I slowly slid off the bonnet and followed him into his little building. He walked around the back of his desk to a little dingy mini fridge. He opened the door and took out something that nearly made me faint with disbelief and absolute thankfulness. All my previous hostility and doubt of his kindness instantly vanished when he handed me the bottle, wet with condensation and wonderfully cold. As I unscrewed the top, the hiss of released pressure was like a golden harp stringing a sweet melody. I sighed in contentment. I had never thought I would be so ecstatic over a drink, but it was the content that excited me so much. As I gulped down the sweet, soft liquidy liquid I smiled appreciatively.

"How did you know?" I asked when the bottom was empty in mere milliseconds.

"Know what?" Mr. Sir walked around the office, shuffling papers and checking the fridge was plugged in.

"Elderflower is my one weakness," I said sighing, and turning the empty bottle in my hands, willing it to fill up again. I was astounded that of all the things in the world to have in, they had Elderflower. I mean it wasn't as if they could nip down to the corner store and stock up. They'd have to ration their choices, only picking vital stocks, I couldn't see Elderflower being top on the list. Unless I was the one picking the rations, but clearly as I wasn't, I was amazed. "I love the stuff," It was true my obsession with Elderflower was known throughout England. I had once, to the utmost embarrassment and shame of my mother, been asked to leave a shop because I had snatched the last Elder cordial from someone's shopping basket. The stupid woman, who clearly didn't need the drink as much as I did, she could get any other drink in the world, but I truly, madly, honestly had to have it, complained to the shop. My week had been ridiculously awful, and all I wanted was to have my drink to chill me out and this fag of a lady decided to whinge and moan

"Excuse me," she had said in her irritating, stupid, nasally voice. "But that was in my basket,"

"No," I had replied "You must be mistaken. For it was in my basket and _you_ stole it,"

"What?" she had shrilly protested "No, no, no. It was in my basket and you took it from me!" she cried.

"I am afraid you are, once more, incorrect. This here," I pointed to the drink "is needed in my system. Therefore it is part of me. Therefore it is mine. How can I steal something that is mine? It is physically impossible. It's logic. You can't argue with logic, if you are then you're going to have to take it up with the scientists of the world. In the meantime, I'll be taking this," I turned to go when I heard her scuttle off (rather like a scorpion) to complain to one of the shop assistants.

"Fucking hell," I muttered. "Look," I said when the assistant had asked me if I had removed items from Scorpion Woman's basket and claimed them as mine, "I actually need this stuff. I'm moving soon and the stress of it all is going to need the calming traits of Elderflower, I do not care if this woman is about to poop out a toy car. I need it more." True I could have bought it somewhere else, but with Noah crying in another aisle that he wanted to go home, mum moaning she needed to pack and iron and everything and the stupid insistence of my parents not letting me leave the house until 'everything was sorted', this really was my last chance of getting the stuff. I had to be 'escorted' to the main office and my mum called on the loud fuzzly speaker that her daughter was 'causing a disruption with other shoppers'. Which was bull. If she hadn't of complained I would have had no problems and not casued a so called disruption. But she had, so I snapped my teeth at her like a little snipping turtle and she cowered. Ha. That served her right, as I didn't get my drink in the end and this was the first time I'd had the glorious Elderflower since setting foot on American soil.

"You and your Aunt have that in common," Mr.Sir said gruffly. Then why didn't she keep it in her own fridge? I wondered. Maybe, like me, the temptation was too much and she had to keep it guarded till the next load got delivered. I smirked. And started humming

_You make me happy_

_When skies are grey._

But after being shot a death glare from Mr. Sir warning me never to be cheerful, I stopped pretty sharpish. He told me that if I kept up my joyful attire I was easier pray, if I adopted a harder more serious outlook, then I was more likely to scare people off. I pooh poohed his idea, commenting that it would make me into a stressy old friendless bitch, the exact moment Lou stepped into the building. She raised her eyebrows, obviously believing that I was referring to her, which was only half true. I had her in mind when I was speaking but it wasn't a direct insult.

"I was wondering where you've been," she said looking at me with an unimpressed expression. "I was hoping you could help me with something?"

I hesitated, what could she want?

Me to feed her pet snake with my own arm or something?

"Erm…yeah sure," I answered uncertainly.

"Great," she said clapping her hands together and showing her pointed teeth when she smiled. I realised when this happened she was anything but sincerely happy. I followed her outside to her car, where a bucket of water and a dirty old black cloth lay. "It needs a bit of a clean," she said smiling sweetly (Note: Sarcasm)

'A bit' being the official understatement of the day. That car was more coated in dusty dirt than X-Ray's glasses.

"Um okay," I said. At least this would give me and Lou some time together, I could even water the seed I had so mastermindedly planted earlier. Oh this could be very beneficial. I bent down to pick up the dirty foul smelly rag she had given me to clean the car and grimaced, this would make the bloody thing even dirtier. I turned to begin my subtle reassurance that my mum was awesome, to only find my Aunt had buggered off, probably to reapply another fucking coat of rattlesnake varnish. One day I was seriously going to nick that and hide it somewhere. Like the fridge, then when she's totally wound herself up and got into a withdrawal frenzy, I may casually mention I put it in the fridge to give it longer life. She couldn't have a go, cause I would only be trying to be nice. Hmmm, that sounded good, revenge would have to wait though. Because I had a freaking car to wash.

_Note to self: Aunt Lou is a bitch_

_Boy's are assholes_

_I hate washing cars_

These were three important points to get me through Camp Nightmare. If I never had to wash another car, see another boy or talk to Lou ever again, I may possibly survive these three long months. She had left me to scrub and scrape and wipe at her stupid dirty car and when I had done that she had the nerve to give me car polish. I nearly told her where to stick it, but caught myself. God knows what she'd do to me. The Asshole's had taken up their tacky wolf whistles when they saw me washing the car. I grimaced, I probably looked like a slutty dancer in a bad music video, covered in soap bubbles messing around on the bonnet. Not that I was messing around on the bonnet. Well not on purpose. They probably thought I was thrusting my chest towards it for their own entertainment when in fact I was actually trying to remove my t-shirt which had got caught in the crack without ripping it and looking like a tit. Thinking about it though, i looked more like a tit from tugging at the material, than if I'd have just casually sat there and waited till they had passed. Lucky for Aunt Lou I didn't get any polish on my top, or else hell would have had lesser fury than me. Tired from a hard (half) day's work I thought about my options. I could trudge back into the cabin and face Lou, hang out with Mr. Sir and the counsellors (fun) risk my luck with the boys, or slowly and quietly curl up and die in a hole. Just as I was contemplating I saw Mr. Sir stop and look at me.

"Been put to work already?" he asked chuckling at me. I however, failing to see the comical side, just glared at him, choosing to hang with the guys. I stood outside the tent for a moment wondering if I should knock or not. I went in when I realised there was nothing to knock on and stopped in my tracks.

Where the hell were they?

It was empty. I sighed and walked back out grumbling to myself. On the way back I noticed the Wreck room.

Hmmmm.

Did I dare?

Pen had said himself that that's where the entertainment on Camp was. But I dare not enter alone. That would be suicide, even I was smart enough to see that.

"Mr. Sir!" I shouted when I was at the door of the Wreck room. He turned from inspecting my job on the car and I beckoned him over hurriedly. I saw him roll his eyes dramatically and throw his arms back in irritation. "Will you come in with me?" I asked once he had trudged over, grumbling.

"No," he said simply. I gaped at him.

"What?" I asked in disbelief "You can't expect me to go inside on my own?" I asked, widening my eyes in irritation. He shrugged un-interestedly.

"Then don't go in," he answered and started walking away, his gun bashing softly against his hip

"Hold it!" I said with such command that he actually spun to face me and raised an eyebrow in questioning. "I have an idea," I elaborated "You give me the gun," I pointed to it. He laughed. At what I still don't know.

"No way lil' lady," he said smugly "I need this," he patted said gun "To protect me from Yella Spotted lizards,"

My turn to raise the eyebrows . "Okay, shall we just look at this?" I asked "Shall the gun go to the helpless small young girl against a gang of sex/girl deprived criminal dudes who has no other defence? Or the scary cowboy dude with big clompy cowboy boots against a small lizard who could easily be squooshed by said boots?" I placed a hand on a hip to emphasise the ridiculousness of the situation he was suggesting. Slowly (and mutteringly) but surely, he removed his shotgun from the holster and placed it in my hand. I grinned from ear to ear I couldn't believe it had actually worked! My reasoning had actually had an effect and won me an argument.

Freaking hell, maybe all this sun _was_ good for me.

Pffft.

So I smiled at Mr. Sir and turned to open the door of the wreck room.

"I'm crazy aren't I?" he asked me before I opened it. I turned and thought about the question.

"Without a singular doubt," I answered as politely as I could to someone who had tried to kill me. "They say you get crazier with age," I said shrugging. He looked at me lividly and I realised he must have thought i had just called him old. Me? Call some crazy scary gun-wilding cowboy old? Shoot. "I mean I'm not saying you're old you're just…youthfully challenged." I said trying to amend it, probably hopelessly.

To the relieved amazement of myself and all those who would suffer his wrath, he began laughing. True it was a scary croaky unfriendly laugh. But at least he wasn't wrapping his fingers around my neck and squeezing mercilessly. I smiled back, although it probably looked rather forced, considering it was. And turned to face my next test. The entire criminal side of the camp on my own. No supervision. Anything could happen. At least I had the gun to protect me. I inhaled deeply and pushed the door.

Dun dun dun!  
xox


	11. Braving The Wreck Room

it thought i'd do a bit of Zero stuff. The deal is that his mum sang this song for him when he was younger, and it fits into the story later on. I don't like this chapter so forgiveth me. (You reviewers need not worry, love is brewing, but it may take some time)  
love y'all

--

A few un interested eyes flicked up to see who had entered the room, and then a silence took over like a Mexican wave, it started from one end of the room and travelled to the next, when they realised it was I who had come in. Then with a rush and speed that was admirable considering they had been digging all day every boy in camp rushed towards me as if was some great prize to be won.

Ha!

Then when I pulled the gun from behind my back they retreated, wide eyed and created a semi circle of space around me.

Wow.

The Power!

I smirked and walked towards the worn out sofa, the semi circle forming into a circle as I went. Soon enough the hush died away and the usual natter of whatever juvy boys talk about rose. The only ones brave enough to approach were, surprise surprise, D-tent lads.

"Damn Jinx. How did you steal that? That's sick!" X-Ray exclaimed. I clenched my teeth and pointed the gun at him

"Ok," I said slowly through gritted teeth "You are never gonna call me Jinx again, ok? It is not my name, it never was my name and it sure as hell isn't ever going to be my name. Got it?" I asked, seizing my moment. I realised I had total control with the gun. I mean held at gun point you'll agree to anything right? So when X nodded I smiled sweetly and congratulated myself on taking the opportunity to straighten at least one thing out.

"How did you get it?" Magnet asked, placing himself beside me, admiring the weapon in my hand

"Ask and thou shall receive," I answered simply "Plus drop in the fact that you don't need to shoot a lizard to kill it and you're right in,"

"You are a crazy one," X-Ray commented. "What's with the Little Miss Sunshine get up?"

"Huh?" was my reply

"You know, the sunnies, the top, the golden fingers," he wiggled his own digits in front of my face.

"All those drugs have gone to your head," I commented quietly.

"Drugs?" he asked raising an eyebrow "What you on about drugs?"

"You know, you must have taken some while you were selling them right. I mean people were paying you some good money for them. If it were me my thought would have been 'Well hey, if these are worth some proper cash, let's see what the fuss is about' yeah?" I said hoping to the Lord above that I hadn't pissed him off enough to grab the gun from my hand and blow my head clean off.

Once again however, to my utter astonishment, someone laughed. X-Ray was roaring at me.

"They weren't no drugs man!" he said "I put oregano and crap into little clear sachets and stood on a corner. Man it was the easiest three hundred bucks I ever made."

My mouth dropped. He put freaking herbs into packets and sold them as drugs?

Bloody hell.

Why didn't _I_ think of that?

I could sure use three hundred dollars right now. Well not right now of course, unless they were selling freedom, but when I got out of here.

"That's fucking smart," I said. He looked smug and nodded in agreement. The gun felt heavy in my hands, and deadly. I knew how dangerous these things were, I loosened my grip on, only slightly though.

"You know he's mad giving you that with us lot in here," Armpit said, his eyes hadn't left the gun since I'd walked in.

"How come?" I asked eyeing Squid and Zigzag in the corner, who were muttering and shooting me uneasy glances.

"Well any one of us could easily take it from you. No problem,"

I took my attention from the couple in the corner and stared at Armpit.

"Excuse me?" I asked raising my eyebrows.

"Well I mean you know…" he looked uncomfortable "you're like a girl so it wouldn't exactly be hard to take it by force."

Whoa

No he didn't.

"You wanna test that logic?" I asked warningly. He looked at the others who shook their heads.

"No," he said, looking put out, as if he wanted a fight with me "You're ok,"

I sighed in relief.

Thank god. If I'd have to fight Armpit I so would have lost. Not that I'd let him know that. And anyways, if the worst come to the worst and he was about to _really_ hurt me, I still had the gun.

Ah the gun.

How strange it felt to be holding a gun.

Pow! Pow! Stick 'em up suckers! Gimme the loot!

Wow I felt like an outlaw. All I needed was Mr. Sir's hat and a scarf to cover my face. And a horse. And riding lessons.

I had got on a horse once, and forgot the helmet (well in truth I filled it with water for the horse to drink out of and it had got ruined so I threw it in a bush, but I wasn't going to tell the cute instructor that) and when I put the darned thing into 2nd gear (instructor called it 'trot' for some reason) it was like I was in an off road monster truck. Bouncing all over the place that horse was. Needless to say, I fell off the bouncing bugger. And thank the lord the instructor dude caught me, cause the horse was literally about seventeen feet (he called it hands but I gathered he was a bit stupid and meant feet). So I haven't been near a horse ever since.

Luckily for the horses of the world.

All of a sudden Zigzag stood up

"Okay, who unplugged the TV?" He asked, his crazy eyes scanning the room suspiciously.

Shit.

I slumped down further into my chair. I had needed to straighten my hair last night and knowing the TV was the only plug in the whole camp practically, I may have been the one to unplug it. I swore I had replugged the TV, but it could have whacked up the tuning Zigzag had spent his whole sentence perfecting.

Like I said.

Shit.

My god I hope he didn't read the suspicion on my face Then, his eyes rested on me, if this had been a cartoon, you would of seen skulls in his eyes.

I think he may have figured out who it was.

He advanced toward me but I took the gun out and he stopped. His eyes narrowed and he stormed out of the Wreck room shouting

"I'd sleep with my eyes open tonight if I were you," as he went. I sucked in breath, looking at the other guys to see if he would actually hurt me. No reply was given and I was scared.

"Woosh," I said softly. Turning the gun over in my hands I sat there, thinking about how fabulous it would be to be back home, sitting in front of the television with people who weren't convicted of a crime and intent of killing me.

"So what's the deal hey?" asked Magnet "How come we ain't had no niece of hers in before?"

"Cause I'm her only niece." I answered, "and I lived in England until now," I continued when he raised his eyebrows in questioning. "hence the 'funny voice,' as someone so kindly put it,"

He nodded "I still don't get why you're here. I mean, you know, it's a Juvie camp!" he laughed.

"Yeah, my mum told me that _after _I got here," I said rolling my eyes. They sucked in breath. "But it's ok, I mean it's all for a good cause,"

"What's that?" X-Ray asked, speaking for the first time since I pointed the gun threateningly at him. I hesitated, revealing the only reason I stayed was for my mum to worm her way back into her sister life wouldn't be the greatest idea. I mean one of them could use it as a way to get something from Lou, exchange a free day or something for valuable information about me. Then the secret would be out. Lou would know and she'd probably send me home. Or worse, keep me here, knowing my reason for staying was screwed up, and I would just be staying because I had to. Now that would be torture.

"Uhh, you know. Entertaining you guys of course!" I said smiling, hoping they didn't realise it was totally fake. I think I got away with it, cause the conversation moved on. The boys asked me if I liked anyone yet and I jut laughed.

"That's got to be a 'yes'," Squid said. He had joined us from the corner, shortly after the storming out of Zigzag.

"No, it's a 'like hell I'm telling you _if it is_ a yes'," I answered, chucking the gun in the air and catching it again. Which it wasn't, it was a 'no'.

Obviously.

"Yeah sure," Armpit answered rolling his eyes. I didn't understand why he was called Armpit, he didn't smell particularly worse than the other guys, in fact he smelled a heck of a lot better than some of the guys that I had got a whiff of when they walked past.

"I still don't get the nicknames," I said "How do you come up with them?"

They shrugged

"I got mine from my sticky fingers," Magnet said, wiggling his tanned fingers around. What was with these guys and wagging their fingers in front of my face?

"And Armpit's is pretty clear!" Caveman said laughing. I turned to Armpit, to see if my suspicions were confirmed, his face dropped.

"Seriously do I really smell?" he asked sounding hurt

"Naw man, he just don't know ya story!" X said thumping him on the arm.

"Story?" I asked my eyes lighting up. I loved stories!

He sighed and said "My first week here I was stung by a scorpion-"

"Eep!" I squeaked

"-in my arm, the pain decided to hit worst in my armpit,"

"Hence the name Armpit," I finished for him "Ahhh comprende,"

Magnet looked at me "¿Tu habla Español?" he said

What did he just say?

Something about Hamlet?

"Sorry, I'm crap at Shakespeare," I said. He looked at me and smiled

"I guess that's a no then," he said. I smiled and nodded, only to realise three hours later that he had been speaking Spanish. I knew Spanish! Well, I didn't but I liked to think I did. It was awesome when people _really_ couldn't speak it. Then I'd waffle on for ages, making up words as I went along, and then I sound dead intelligent. But now I just agreed with myself that Magnet was crazy, for now at least.

Oh God I still had that song in my head

"You'll never know dear how much I love you," I sang quietly, trying t get it out of my head and into the air.

"What was that?" Zero asked.

Hold it. _Zero_ asked!

"I was…err just singing," I answered as the other boys looked on in as much astonishment as me.

"What song?" he asked

"You are my sunshine," I said. He looked expectantly at me, and I wondered what ever for Then a thought struck me. He didn't want me to sing it for him did he? "But I've almost finished it," I said.

Silence.

And then,

"Then finish it. Loudly," X-Ray, who had rudely been listening in to our conversation, said.

"No I don't sing well," I admitted. Which was so true, I hadn't been able to sing in key my whole life, I doubt it was really going to start now. Mind you it was only one line of the song. I couldn't cock it up that much. Right?

"We don't care. Do you know how much music entertainment we get here? How about none. Even when we do it ain't _good_ music. And hearing a chick sing has been unknown on these premises for about one hundred years,"

"Nu-uh," I said shaking my head "That ain't true. My mama said she used to sing _all_ the time when she was younger."

"What's that got to do with anything? Was your mom a Warden here too?" X asked

"No!" I said. Bugger, how was I going to explain that. Right back-pedal. No! They'll think I'm hiding something. Ok, make something up. But what? It was too late to think of something now, they were all looking at me. "So don't take my sunshine awaaaayy!" I bellowed out Opera style, in desperation. Maybe that would distract them. They began cheering and I sighed in relief. That was close.

"Hey let me see that," some guy reached over the back of me and made a grab for the gun. I swung it from his reach and gave him a warning glare.

"No-" I began, before I felt the gun being tugged out of my hands by another person.

What? Was I really being mugged in a Juvie Camp? I spun back around to face the person who was prying my weapon from me. Now when you're scared and fighting for your life you adapt some extra amazing super strength. That was like now, sure I wasn't fighting for my life, but if you looked at the bigger picture, I potentially was. Anyways I decided to use one of my shin kicks that Noah had taught me (true I'd only learnt it because he so often used it on me, but the joke's on him, cause I now how shins of steel!) and it seemed this guys had shins of steel too, so I aimed a bit higher, noting the fact that no one was rushing to my aid. And hit him where it hurt. Not on purpose, I just wanted him to let go of the gun. But he doubled over in pain and I held the gun close to me,

"Sorry!" I hissed at the guy on the floor. I hadn't realised that in the struggle the hammer thing on the back of the gun must had been cocked, and as I was stupidly fingering the trigger, it kind of shot a bullet. I squealed as I heard glass smash, turning frantically to see if I'd killed anyone. And noticed the TV was screwed, as in a bullet through the glass screwed.

Balls.

Glad Zigzag wasn't here to see _that. _Then I wouldn't only be sleeping with eyes open, it would be with the fishies, as the Mafia would say. Oh god, if I find a horse head in my bed I'm so reporting him. Just then the door flung open. Mr. Sir, Lou and another counsellor cam bustling in.

"What's going on?" Lou screeched. Looking from the gun in my hand to the smashed television and the boys.

"Oh I err…" I hesitated, if I told her I had shot it by mistake, she'd have one huge hissy fit. "There was a fight. I thought I'd get their attention by shooting, you know. But I hit the TV,"

"Who was fighting?" Mr. Sir demanded.

"Err… I don't know their names,"

"Well point them out," Lou said.

"I didn't see their faces, they were rolling around on the floor and stuff,"

"Well point them out. Surely you saw their build? Their hair colour?" the other counsellor inquired

I just shrugged "No, just heard the fighting and shot the gun," I said.

"I'll find out!" Lou warned. "Take her to the cabin," she said, pointing to me but keeping her eyes on the boys. Mr. Sir grabbed my arm and pulled me away.

"Great timing," he muttered sarcastically, his grip still firm even though we had left the wreck room "I was just telling your Aunt that you'd be safer with my gun in there when the shot went off and you screamed. She thought someone had been killed,"

"Sorry," I muttered. We got to the cabin and he opened the door.

"Get in," he sighed.

"I'm going," I walked through and glanced darkly around me. The door swung shut behind me and I heard the click of a lock. Spinning round I tried the door. It wouldn't budge. Fabulicious.

I was imprisoned in a log cabin.

This was going to be a _fun summer holiday._


	12. Apologise? Nah, just teach him a Game

Err don't own the clicky game, aparently it's from P.S i Love you, but that is from the mouth of my odd friend so, who knows? It''ll resurface soon. Enjoy. Oh and i wanted to give Lou a bit more depth with the whole application form thing. To show that he was raised to be evil and not born that way. it's just me being nice is all. okies! biiii

I am a genius, a true and enviable genius.

Through some too-huge-and-complicated-to-understand miracle I have officially survived one whole week at Camp Green Lake.

I know, I know, I'm amazed too. The moment my stupid little clicking clock announced that it had been precisely one hundred and sixty eight hours since I arrived in the dried up holey wasteland, I leant out of the window and screamed to all who'd listen that I only had eleven or so weeks left in this awful place. I got shouted back at that someone had eleven _months_ left, so I quickly retreated my head in case a jealously flung boot collided with it. Nonetheless I was in a jolly mood. If I could survive a whole week here, no doubt I could survive two. Who knows? By then I may have persuaded Aunt Lou to accept my Mum back into her life. Then I would be free.

It had taken a short amount of time to persuade Aunt Lou that I needed freeing from my prison. She had restricted my cell to my room only. I had moaned and whinged and complained. I had bribed and threatened and begged. I had said Pretty please with a cherry on top, in abut a million different ways, the end result being chocolate shaped to resemble cherries (Aunt Lou's allergic to them (future revenge idea!)) three and a half baked potatoes, a Christmas ham and six live geese on top. And all to no avail. I had to resort to something I didn't want to do.

Before leaving Mr. Sir the day I washed the Queen's car, I had tested my masterful sneaking skills and dropped a few elderflower bottles into my bag. Every so often I'd take a swig, when I was feeling stressed. But on the third day of imprisonment I had decided I had had enough. So ever so casually I clinked them together, right by the door of my room. Her acute senses picked it up from the kitchen

"What was that?" she demanded angrily

"Oh you know. Just a few supplies I picked up passing through Mr. Sir's office," I said in an unconcerned voice.

"Not my elderflower?" she growled

"Elderflower? In Mr. Sir's office? Well thanks for the heads up. I know where to fetch it from now. I'm sure the boy's would _love_ to know where it is don't you? And knowing it's the only thing keeping you sane might heighten the reward a bit don't you think?"

Result.

The door flung open with no hesitation.

"Get out and don't say a word to no one about nothing ok?"

"Rightio," I answered cheerfully handing her some Elderflower. I sprang out the door flinging my arms wide, embracing the blinding sun and stiffing heat.

But me myself and I had done a whole week here, and I was très impressed. I think i needed to celebrate to be honest. But I couldn't think of one thing that I could do.

"Penny!" I sang, going into the counsellors tent. "Do you have the key to the mess hall?"

He looked up at me.

"It's in here somewhere," he said standing and rooting through some chest. The other counsellors were looking at me. I bet they were as crooked as Mr. Sir and Aunt Lou. Crazy, the lot of them.

"Here it is," he said standing and dangling a key before my face "What do you need it for anyways?" he closed his hand around it and started walking from the tent.

Oh god.

I had meant for him to give me the key and leave me to it. Not escort me there and open it himself. Grudgingly I followed. He was singing on about something ridiculously cheerful when I noticed something. As I walked past the Mess hall window I saw someone walking inside. It wouldn't have bothered me except for the fact that it was locked and we had the only key to get. And the person was a girl. Not a woman, no Aunt Lou who I saw yelling at two orange clad boys off in the distance. But a frizzy haired girl. I froze as a shiver went up my spine. Was this place haunted? And if so by who? I had wondered what this place was before now. Camp Green Lake. Was there ever a lake here? Was it always a dry wasteland or did people live here before now? I took a deep breath and stepped backwards. Slowly turning my head to the side to take another look in the window I jumped. The girl was looking straight at me. She looked familiar, as if I'd seen her before. I took a step forward, and then realised that I was an absolute dumbass.

I was staring at my reflection in the window. I swore to myself and joined Pen at the door.

"What did you want in here anyways?" he asked again.

"Oh err I was going to make a cake," I said, waiting patiently for the door to open. He stopped midway through opening it and looked at me.

"Out of what? Onions and Spinach?" he said chuckling.

"Yeah Penny, out of Onions and Spinach." I answered still waiting for the door to be opened. I had leant to just agree to whatever anyone said here, unless you wanted to be thrown into the pit of doom. He smiled and opened the door.

"Danke," I walked in and stopped. What the hell was this?

People actually _ate _here?

Bloody hell.

"Stock room's over there," Mr Cheery said. Pointing the a dusty old cupboard sized room.

Two minutes later I then realized the crack about the Spinach and Onions. That was seriously the only edible things in the whole entire camp. I decided to trek back to the cabin and collapse on some surface. However upon entering the fouls excuse for living quarters. I noticed something on Aunt Lou's dresser. It was a yellow and white brochure, looking behind me to see if she was around I picked it up and opened it out. It was advertising a Drama University. I gasped. I ad no idea Aunt Lou was interested in drama, I had always wondered where I got it from. Mum couldn't lie for money, never mind act and dad had no desire to be the centre of attention in any situation. I stared at the application wondering why Aunt Lou was still working here. She clearly hated every moment she spent here with a passion, why didn't she apply? Maybe she couldn't afford it. I remember my mother telling me that to come to England she had to stay at her friends and work night shifts and odd jobs for money, for months and months on end just for the boat fare. She wouldn't dare go by plane, the security would surely pick up on the fact that she was on her own, the boat was packed enough for her to blend into a family unnoticed. Reading through the brochure I was hooked, deciding I definitely wanted to go to this collage myself. And although she was being a bitch right now, I really wanted Aunt Lou to be given the chance to even go to a Open Day. I sighed looking at the life I knew she was missing out on to be in this hell hole for some god knows reason. Well I grabbed a pen and started filling it out. Not that I meant to send it off or anything, I just wanted to push her in the right direction, let her know she had other options. Then the house shook. Like really shook. As if the entire Amazonian rainforest had fell down next to it. Slowly I stood, frightened of what I may find and peered out the window.

Oh for the love of sheep's breath.

Can't he just fucking fuck off to another crazy weirdo planet or something.

Am I his new stalkering project or what?

He is seriously out to get me.

You got it. Crazy Hair had been thrown into the side of the cabin, making it shake like a leaf.

I stormed out.

"Some of us are trying to sleep you know?" I asked in a peed off way.

"With those peepers open I hope?" he asked in his stupid Texan accent.

"Oh get a new threat, and a new voice while you are at it," I retorted, not quite understanding the words coming from my mouth, but agreeing with them anyways.

"Excuse me? Little Miss Proper? Wants _me_ to get a new voice. Go back home chick. You don't belong here,"

"Oh yeah I'll just grab the next taxi that drives by, holler when you see one," I said sarcastically.

"You're the one with the phone, why don't you ring one? Tell you what, I'll pay for it. At least it'll get you out of my hair,"

I laughed bitterly "How could you even _find_ me in your hair? You'd need a freaking map!"

He narrowed his eyes and just stared in a stupid scary staring kind of way.

"Don't look at me in that tone of voice." I said. And turned to go back into the cabin.

"You make no sense!" he shouted "You never make sense!"

I wheeled round

"Excuse me but I wasn't the one thrown into a crazy juvie camp for being a lunatic. I don't go around setting schools on fire, or handing out death threats to people who accidentally fucked up your TV. I wasn't the one who ran into the side of a cabin just to have an argument with an amazing girl. I ain't the one who don't make sense here. You're the mentalist." I shouted back. A few spectators had gathered to watch our little drama sketch but I didn't care. He was pissing me off, and I was going to tell him what I thought.

Even if it got me killed.

"You're just a fucking…you're just…Fuck off," he said. Wow great comeback hun.

Looked like I hit the spot just right there.

Damn, one of these days I swear I'm going to die from an overdose of being amazing.

"Yeah, you think upon that, and when you get a comeback from your twisted mind. You give me a call," I sneered and shut the door on him.

Maybe that was a bit mean.

Okay maybe that was definite uncalled for bitchiness.

But it was okay. I'd make it up to him. I'd apologise.

Or teach him one of my amazing games.

Maybe the Clicky game. Yeah. That sounded good.

The Clicky Game.


	13. Trust Issues

Hey hey! So i'm sorry if his isn't correct in any way (with snaps the clicky game i mean, this is the way i was taught it) and i'm not sure about this chappy cause i wrote it before most of the others, so it's a bit different. Alright then. Review and i will give you more darlings!  
xox

I walked out of the cabin and was heading for a stroll when I noticed Zigzag sitting by the blocks of showers, scowling to himself. I walked over and sat next to him.

"Do you wanna play a game?" I asked. He blatantly ignored me and my kind request and got up to walk away. That didn't faze me, I was going to crack this guy. "Its called the Clicky game!" I said following him. He glanced sideways at me in a confused way.

Aha!

I got him. I continued speaking "I say a few words to describe someone, then you have to guess who it is."

This time he stopped and stared at me full on.

"How does _that _work?" he asked sceptically "You don't know anyone here,"

"I can improvise. Look, I'll show you. Cat," I clicked my fingers randomly and distractingly round his face "Avocado," random clicking "Violin," click click clickety click "Egg," clicking "Mouse," click click clickety "Architecture," more random clicking "Numa numa!" I yelled finally running totally out of words.

"Numa numa?" he asked in disbelief, "Who the hell are you talking about?"

Aha!

So _now_ he was interested in the game was he?

"It was Caveman. Obviously," I answered.

"Oh clearly," he replied sarcastically.

"Look," I said "Cat, Avocado, Violin, Egg, Mouse, Architecture, Numa-numa. What does the first letter of every word spell? CAVEMAN!" I yelled in glee. Zigzag thought about it, then I saw understanding grace his features, he still lacked that nice smile though.

"Clever," he said, then began to walk away.

"But you have to keep it a secret," I explained "Just between us. So that when we play with other people, we are the only ones who can win," I could practically feel my eyes glinting wickedly "Are you in?" I held out my hand. Slowly he grasped it, said

"Whatever," and stalked back into the tent. "Hey guys!" I heard him yell in an unnecessarily audible voice, as they must have been standing mere feet from him. "Rachel just told me a secret. You wanna hear?" I froze.

He wouldn't.

Would he?

If he bloody did, I'd 'put a hurt on him'.

I wasn't going to take any chance and pelted into the tent. I tried to cover his mouth to stop him talking but he was just too tall. I jumped on his back and clasped my hands over his mouth. This was meant to be our secret game, no one else. The whole point was to try and gain his trust in me, but then he goes and blabs himself?

"Don't!" I said warningly. Zigzag was spinning around, me still on his back. He eventually pushed me off and I stared at him, my eyes cold.

"I weren't gonna tell them," he said, rubbing his mouth thoughtfully where I had put my hands. "I was gonna use it as leverage," he explained. My eyes turned to balls of fury. LEVERAGE? My trust in him, my secret that I'd been good enough to include him in, used as leverage.

Oho that was rich.

"It's because no-one ever trusts _you _isn't it?" I asked.

"What?" he asked, his eyes narrowing, even thought my own were shooting red hot lasers at him.

"That's why you don't trust any, because no one trusts you," he looked shocked and then annoyed at my harsh words. I looked at him in disgust "And I can see why," my cue to storm out, mega pissed off (MPO) After a while I heard hurried footsteps chasing me and then a strong arm around my shoulder. I turned my head to see who it was.

"Get lost X. Now's not a good time,"

"Hey like mom said, you're part of the D tent. And we look out for each other," he said. I could feel the muscles in his arms around my shoulder. All the digging sure had built him up well.

"What's his freaking problem?" I asked X "All I've ever done s try to be friendly and prove myself trustworthy to him."

X-Ray shrugged steering me into an unknown direction. I realised we were heading towards the shower block.

"He's just weird Rachel," he answered. "Forget him," That was weird. Even though these guys were criminals, I had always got the impression that the tents made a sort of dysfunctional family and the leader stood up for their tent, otherwise why would the other boys want him as their leader? And X-Ray himself said that the tent stuck together. Yet here he was dismissing his tent mate, telling me to forget him. Like I said, weird. I looked around and realised that wherever this we were going was somewhere I had never been before. Suddenly he stopped and turned abruptly to face me.

"Remember when I said I put dibs on you?" he asked.

Oh god, so _this_ was where the conversation was going?

Fabulous.

"Yeah. I also remember the four specific words of 'four holes a day'." I retorted back. He snorted and leant close to my ear

"Not if anyone finds out," he whispered, his breath sending a shiver down my spine "And I won't tell if you don't,"

Tell what?

What was he going to do?

Oh god I should just make a run for it.

Thinking of it I should just start running and keep going until i got home. Sure I'd have one hell of a stitch and probably a minor heart attack, but at least I wouldn't be here, getting nearly raped.

"Oh-ho!" said an amused scratchy voice "X-ray'll be digging till his little fingers bleed isn't that right?" We both turned to see who was talking.

Oh merry foxes in a bush, I'd never in my whole life been so glad to see a scary cowboy dude who'd left me to die on my first day at a juvy Camp. I very nearly flung my arms around Mr. Sir's neck at that point. If that idea wasn't extremely and wrongfully wrong.

"You Aunt's looking for you," he said facing me "She says she don't want you hanging in those tents anymore,"

I nodded and walked back towards the cabin, when I looked back I saw Mr. Sir eyeing X-Ray evilly.

Okay.

That was close.

Thank god Mr. Sir had said I wasn't allowed in the tents no more. It would give me an excuse to never have to go in there again. Sure they would think I was afraid to break the rules but did I really care what they thought of me? I thought I did, but after tonight I had decided that getting involved with these boys was a mistake. I had always thought that helping people was a good rewarding thing to do. But not when they didn't _want_ to be helped. Like Zigzag, how was he meant to get over his paranoia if he couldn't even trust people enough to believe they could just want to be his friend, just want to get to know him hey? Not everyone was out to get him but how was anyone able to tell him if he didn't trust them? I would have made it my duty to tell, make it my own vow to not give up on him and work until he trusted me. If I hadn't of just made a different vow to not get involved. Plus I'm way too lazy for all that hard work.

I grimaced once again at the thought of spending three months here. What was there for me to do except paint my nails with rattlesnakes or dig crazy holes.


	14. Gold Tubes and Silver Shovels

Aunt Lou was sitting at the table rolling something in between her hands, staring into space. I sat opposite her.

"Hey," I said softly. Slowly her eyes focused and looked into mine. A cracked smile crept onto her face "What's that?" I asked reaching out to take the small tube she was cradling. Her hand instinctively closed over it, then they relaxed and opened to let me take it. I wrapped my own fingers around her object and dragged it towards me. I turned it over and nodded politely when I realised it was a gold lipstick tube.

"Nice," I said handing it back to her "Very…nice,"

She smirked. "It ain't mine," she said "It belonged to Kissin' Kate Barlow." her voice went admiration and her eyes misty when she said the name. Must have been a good friend of hers or something. Again I gave my best 'polite nod', wondering if I actually managed to pull of looking even mildly interested.

"You've no idea who she is do you?" my Aunt asked.

Clearly my acting skills were slipping.

"Sorry," I said sincerely "Were you and her close?" the interested look was being put into practice again when I said this. She cackled, throwing her head back like a mad woman, she reminded me of me, when I had thought I was in hell. Jesus those boys must have been terrified of me. I raised my eyebrow, in half-confusion, half-fear.

"She lived a long time ago," was all the information I received. Oh and "And she has something I want,"

That night I tossed and turned unable to sleep. This Camp really did get weirder by the day. A dead woman possessing something my Aunt wanted? A coffin? A headstone? Blimey O'Riley. Who knows? By tomorrow Pendanski will tell he and Mr. Sir have decided to perform a number from Hairspray and I wouldn't even be mildly surprised. I giggled at the thought of Mr. Sir booming out Big Blonde and Beautiful. Needless to say my dreams were plagued with horrific, indecent images and when I woke to the fanfare and sleepily stumbled to the 'Library', I refused to look any of the counsellors in the eye.

"Good morning!" sang Pen happily and I was forced to meet his gaze as he stood expectantly before me. When my gaze reached is face I spluttered with laughter. The fact tat he'd used seven whole tubs of sun lotion on his nose gave his 'Baltimore' number a whole new kick. He didn't seem particularly fazed but I dropped my eyes just in case I done something highly embarrassing like snorting through my nose. But he was still speaking "Me and the boys have a counsel meeting tonight and Rex-" I raised my eyebrows at the use of someone's real name. "X-ray," he corrected himself. So X-Ray's name was Rex? Sounded more like a dog's name than a boys, I mused. Oh crap better listen to what Pen had to say

"-did in fact say you were a D-tent member, and if you like you an attend and see how we try to correct the behaviour problems than lead to crime here at Camp Green Lake." I laughed he sounded like he was advertising an open day. I wonder how many times Aunt Lou had drilled that tat into his head.

"I'll think about it," I answered knowing full well I wasn't going anywhere near any counsel meeting.

"So what are you doing today?" he asked. I had absolutely no desire to be stranded out with the boys, especially after yesterday, I had so far kept to my vow and was rather proud of myself. So I shrugged

"You can help me!" he called enthusiastically.

"What with?" I asked suspiciously. If he asked me to help him paint his nails with rattlesnake venom I was walking.

I didn't care.

I would totally risk being ambushed by huge rabbits rather than stay after that.

"You know, filling the water truck, checking stocks, keeping your Aunt happy."

I laughed

"And how would one succeed in completing that nigh impossible task?" I asked waiting for an answer with bated breath. Penny looked entertained and scanned the camp, presumably Aunt Lou wasn't in earshot or any of her 'cameras' were watching, and then laughed

"It's a chore, but worth it for a quiet life," he answered. I looked at him in astonishment was this my Aunt's most loyal employee bitching about her? Hmmm maybe this wasn't as squeaky clean, correct side of the law as I thought I was. I knew Lou could be an intimidating cow but that was just because she had to be the all feared scary lady here, the one to take charge. But Pen, Mr. Sir and the other counsellors who I hadn't met yet were meant to be on her side. She had no real reason to be shirty with them, so they had no reason to be frightened of her.

Right?

Maybe she had just gotten so used to being like that she couldn't switch off. I had noticed her using the 'Don't you even dare dream about arguing with me or I'll make you life worse than hell' look and tone with me even. I could understand where Pen was coming from but I still think Lou deserved the benefit of the doubt. She'd not had an easy life and I doubted she'd ever been given a break before. I vowed to stop being a stroppy git to her and show the pleasant wonderfully wonderful Rachel.

"Niece!" I heard a horrifically hoarse cry from none other than her-who-I-vowed-to-be-nice-to. I cringed at her tone and her cruel use of my relation to her instead f my actual name but shrugged it off.

"Yes Aunt?" I asked she was striding towards me like a bull on steroids.

"Job for you. I don't want you lunging about, making out with these boys today."

"I wasn-" I began defending myself but she cut across me.

"Don't really care what you were doing, it's distracting them," she handed me a shovel.

Like hell I was going to dig!

I asked in my best 'giving you a break' voice

"What job do you wish me to do?" she was still holding out the shovel which I had yet to take, expecting me to give in and take it.

"I want you to spin me a web of stars made from the piss of night elves," her eyes flamed into mine, her voice rising. I could feel everyone listening.

She never had an easy life, I told myself,

"But surely you can't expect me to dig?" I asked politely. She rolled her eyes angrily and leant close to my face.

"Get over yourself," she spat at me "You ain't better than the rest of us." she threw the shovel at my chest and I grabbed the handle before it fell to the floor. She'd never been given a break before, I told myself. She stormed away into her beloved air-conditioned cabin.

"Let's go boys," Pendanski called, breaking the awkward silence "Let's go. Let's go Let's go," before he left I jabbed my finger at him,

"She needs some action," I said angrily through gritted teeth "and soon," with a look of anger and meaning portrayed through the narrowing of eyes. His own widened in pure shock, as if the thought that he a man and her a woman had never crossed his mind. Mumbling angry death threats and eternity long curses on the Camp, and running the risk of sounding like Ugly Grey Suit Man, I walked behind a tent. (obviously not a tent itself, but the way things were going an actual walking tent would really have not been a huge shock to the system). I grumblingly decided I would stay with d tent, breaking my vow mere hours after I had made it and hurried to catch up with them although I did not talk to them. They were shown where to dig and when the counsellor left they turned to me. I was leaning on the shovel watching the retreating back of the counsellor with a burning glare. He had pointed to a place where I should dig and handed me a horrendous orange jumpsuit.

Not impressed.

X-ray strolled towards me and took my shovel. I nearly fell over as it was still my leaning post, but caught myself inches away from making a fool of myself. I was actually surprised to discover I still cared about embarrassing myself, it had become such a natural thing for me I was sure that it wouldn't bother me. He handed me his shovel instead. I looked at it, unless it was a self-digging shovel I failed to see how this could help me, because I surely was not going to dig. Or maybe it was my shovel tat was the self-digging one and X-Ray took it for himself.

"It's shorter than the rest," he explained humbly, referring, I realised, to the shovel he had just given me "Smaller shovel, smaller hole," his voice was quiet and coming form anyone else would sound grumpy. I knew this would have been a huge sacrifice for him, giving his one and only comfort, knowing he was don les work than the rest of them, to me. It was a gesture not to be accepted lightly. I held it out to him, giving him my best smile in the way of thanks. When he stared at it in confusion I took my own back and pressed his own, special shovel, which had probably cost months and months of work to gain respect and reputation to own, into his hand.

"Thank-you," I said "but you need it more than I do,"

he looked taken aback.

"And why would that be?" he asked.

"Because the day I stick a shovel in this dirt is the day Monsoons flood the camp," I said simply. A grin spread across his face and he began digging his own hole.

"She'll expect a hole though," he told me.

"No worries," I answered "I'll just sit in one that's already been dug."

All of a sudden, it was as if someone had decided to do a test run at a light bulb factory. Eyes lit up like a Christmas light festival. I practically heard the 'pings' of realisation popping into their heads.

"Fucking hell," Magnet said slowly "the girl's a genius. I smiled dangling my legs inside the hole I had decided to sit on the edge of . I looked at my feet . Then screamed like a wounded Harpy, scrabbling up and as far away as I could. Only mere inches away (in reality it was closer to feet but in my panic inches seemed a better word to describe the distance) was an entire family of scorpions.

"Yeah," muttered Armpit sarcastically "A real genius,"

"Hey. Don't be hating," X-Ray said in my defence. But I was to freaked out by then to even notice what people were saying. My one and only primary singular fear. I mean I'd happily bungee jump off a bridge ten million feet in the air, gladly let a fifty nine inch thick snake drape itself upon my shoulders, fearlessly de-spider a bath or bedroom. But put me _near_ a scorpion and I'd totally freak out on you. I think it stemmed form watching all those desert films, with scarab beetles that crawl under your flesh and eat you from the inside, and the malaria infested mosquitoes that can poison your blood and send a deadly illness into your veins with a single bite. Scorpions just seem to fit in with the other deadly beasts of the desert. F course when my dad let me watch those films he never imagined for a second that I'd actually end up in a desert, terrified of the wildlife. I chose a scorpion free hole to pretend I had dug and had Squid check it twice for potential occupants that may have been hiding. Once safety inspector Squid gave the all clear, I was read to go. I jumped down into the hole and leant my shovel on the side. I kicked the sides so that the old soil fell and new (what looked like freshly dug) soil rested on the edges. I also dragged some of the dirt with my foot to make the bottom look uneven and the hole look slightly unfinished. I would have used the shovel but that would have contradicted my earlier, rather loud, statement and as the sky was too clear and blue to give way to monsoon clouds just yet, I wasn't going to give in first. Slipping on the jumpsuit thing and smearing it and my hands in dirt I amazed even myself. So b the time the water truck came around, I looked like the best digger on camp. I had casually shuffled the dirt so that the mark where the counsellor ad told me to dug was gone. And I was lying on the ground, legs in my (scorpion free) hole, shovel discarded to one side.

Oh dear.

It was Penny doing the rounds.

"Rachel come and get some water," he tried tempting me once the boys had waited in line and received their water. I shook my head

"No," I answered staring up at the endless stretch of powder blue sky above me.

"You'll get dehydrated," he said looking over at me "Did you dig that hole?!" he suddenly yelled in disbelief.

"No," I answered sarcastically "I just sat in an already dug one and rolled around in the dirt a bit," I rolled my eyes to emphasise how ridiculous that idea was. Pen was looking astounded and staggered towards me, peering in to check it was my hole. I silently congratulated myself on knocking the sides of the holes in to reveal fresh dirt. Looking at the boy's expressions, they were doing exactly the same.

"You must…must have some sort of…electric shovel or something!" He said, still in total disbelieving hock that I had actually got of my arse and dug a hole, he picked up the shovel and examined it. I sat up and snatched it back

"All real," I reassured him "Won't find no battery pack or any 'on' button," I threw it carelessly to one side and lay back down. I felt Penny's startled eyes and gawping mouth still upon me so I sat back up again.

"Anything else Senor?" I asked as politely a I could possibly muster. He tilted his head sideways then walked away muttering things like, 'unbelievable' and 'incredible' and shaking his head. I sighed in annoyance, had he taken no notice of my stand?

"All the more reason for water Rachel," he said rooting in the back of his truck "You've been working hard,"

Aha!

So he _had_ listened.

"You an go back to camp now. The Warden's waiting for you with a special treat," he clapped his hands like an overexcited child.

"What is it?" I muttered "She want me to polish the silverware? No thanks, I'll stay here."

"Rachel," Pen tried reasoning with my bizarre logic "If you _are_ here, which I strongly advise against, you need water. Or you'll die,"

"Then let me die," I sighed dramatically, placing my hand to my head and coughing wheezily. He had no clue that I was messing and darted to my side, propping me up. He had grabbed someone else's water on the way past and was trying to force fed me it

"Get off!" I shook myself away sighing "I was acting," he flushed beetroot embarrassed "She wants me to dig, she wants me to die," I concluded "Her choice, lose a hole or a niece. I 'm not coming back till she decides dig no more. Or…you know_ she_ can tell my parents why I'm a fried crispy corpse rather resembling a burnt chip,"

So maybe my valiant and threatening speech wasn't so, but the same affect was achieved nonetheless. He stood, nodded and ran to his truck, oh so very nearly falling straight in a hole. He drove off at a speed most admirable straight towards camp, ignoring the confused water deprived criminals who were shouting and complaining for water. Turning back to my hole, I meant every word of it, I wasn't going to walk back to camp like a criminal who'd just served part of their punishment. I wasn't a doormat.


	15. Hot Date for Lou

Than you to my lovely readers and my fabbylicious reviewers, you are all tres wonderful. Do not fret Love is slowly creeping up on poor unknowing Rachel, when she has a grudgingly honest conversation with a certain someone. Ooooh!!

Then I remembered something and looked at the water canteen Penny had snatched on his way to revive. Scribbled in black pen was the name

"Zigzag'

Bloody hell. _It would_ only happen to me. If any other girl had come here and for some reason been given a water canteen of the other boy's it would have been Magnet's or Squid's or Caveman's or someone from the group of nice people. Would it happen to any other? I think not. I sighed in resignation and stood up, walking over to his hole. He was angrily pummelling the dirt to death with his shovel.

"Now that you've well and truly deceased the bugger, why don't you try moving it out of the hole and into that little pile there?"

He glanced up, narrowed his eyes, and then went back to work. I sat down by his hole, I needed to save my energy, I don't have any water.

"What do you want?" he yelled, throwing his shovel down and staring at me with wild crazy eyes that I had no doubt would kill. Something had well and truly pissed him off lately. I wondered if it was me.

"To give you the most precious thing on the planet," apart from me of course, but if I said that I had no doubt he would pounce "Life," I handed him the canteen. He blushed and took it from me, gulping fiercely, throwing his head back, though his eyes stuck on me. When he finished he wiped his lips. Then he opened his mouth. I thought he was going to say thank-you, or at least 'sorry for being an absolute asshole lately, there is no excuse for my ridiculous behaviour except that your blinding beauty angered me, knowing I could never achieve a star prize like you,' Maybe everything would be alright between us. His unknown hate for me would slowly dissolve because I had returned to him the most sought after element here. Water.

"You sound like Mr. Sir when you say that," he said

Maybe not.

Maybe we'll just hate each other for ever more. Well it suited me fine, I wasn't going to go out of my way to please someone who'd throw it back in my face. Not that I'd o out of my way to piss him off either.

Much.

I stalked off and resumed the lying on the ground. I didn't mind getting dust on the hideous jumpsuit as I never would in my life wear it again.

Oh how the hours drag by when one has nothing to do. Or say. My throat was drying up because of my water refusal. I slowly sat up, contemplating whether it was worth persuading any of the others to share. After half an hour of debating in my head, the thirst got the better of me and I chose my victim carefully. I hadn't had much contact with Squid lately, so I couldn't have annoyed him too much for him to refuse. I shuffled along the dirt on my backside to his hole.

"Hey Squidy," I said sitting cross-legged. He looked up and grinned, his face dusty and dirty "This protesting sure is thirsty work," I aid looking innocently unaware that I was dropping hints. He continued that digging action they did here, still grinning. I sighed, stretching as if I was tired, my hand casually creeping towards his canteen. He looked up and I grinned with my teeth, his eyes travelled down my arm

"Hey!" he said when he saw my outstretched fingers inches from his water.

"Pleeeaase!" I whined like a small child "I might die from water deprivation,"

He rolled his eyes and carried on bloody digging. I was in disbelief, how could he just stand there and dig when I was so obviously inches from death? Desperately in need of just a sip of water. I knew for a fact that X-Ray would give me some with no hesitation. He may joke about a bit about wanting something in exchange, but id get some in the end though. Like hell I was going to admit defeat to Squid though. He would give me some, even if he didn't know it yet. I decided to take the polite approach first.

"May I please have the tiniest drink of you water please?" I asked smiling sweetly "I'll never try to steal some ever again. It's just, being so parched, I believe the sun's ray's have seeped into my head and muddled up my brain,"

"That's what they're calling it these days? Sun's ray's?" Magnet asked. I glared at him, he was interrupting my speech,.

"It's just I couldn't possibly understand the difference from right and wrong. I mean we've all been there haven't we," I smiled, knowing they could relate to _that_. "So if you would be wonderfully brilliant and let a few drops slide down my dusty throat, I'd be forever grateful," I waited until he looked up to smile innocently.

"If it'll shut you up," he said giving it to me.

"Yes!" I called, drinking the lukewarm water. It wasn't as wonderfully refreshing as ice Elderflower but that couldn't be helped, it was still fantastic.

"Ok my turn," I said what felt like days later "Would you rather be viciously mauled by a giant man eating Squirrel _or_ spend the night with Aunt Lou,"

"Squirrel!" came the cries of everyone, and I laughed.

"Would you rather Mr. sir or Mom?" Squid asked. I pretended to puke and stayed silent.

"Come on!" they coaxed "Answer the question,"

"Mom," I responded quietly and squirmingly.

Cheers, cries of 'Whoa!' and wolf whistles erupted around the section where the boys were digging. We had been playing 'Would you rather,' for about half an hour now.

"My turn! My turn!" I shouted over the noise. They settled but only slightly, so I carried on yelling "Would you rather find out Mr. Sir was gay or Penny was a paedophile? Personally I'd chose the Gay Mr. Sir, because it wouldn't really be much of a shock. Am I right?" I asked. The noise had stopped halfway through my sentence, but I had continued shouting. I didn't realise what had caused the immediate calm but when I turned around I found out.

"Your Aunt wants you back now," Mr. Sir growled at me, clearly _very_ pissed off.

Cringe.

The boys went back to digging, smirks still on their faces.

"But I'm not digging no more holes right?" I asked, just to make sure"No," he almost shouted "No more holes for Rachel. Now get in the truck,"

"Oh err…I'll walk," said. Like I was going to sit in a confined transportational tin with him after I implied he was rather camp.

Anyone would think I'm suicidal.

"No, it's quicker in the truck. Your Aunt _really_ wants to see you."

I hesitated but he just grabbed my arm and yanked me towards the truck. I could see his gun smacking against his hip when he walked. If I got shot and my body mysteriously vanished, do you think any one would actually notice? I mean I had gone a few days without anyone noticing me. Some days Aunt Lou wouldn't see me because I was with the boys, and some days the boys wouldn't see me because I was in the cabin. Sometimes I done that days on end. I calculated it would take about a week for anyone to notice. Then maybe a few people would wonder

"Hey where's that crazy girl who used to be around here? Did she go home?"

And then a few days after _that _Aunt Lou might go around the camp a bit looking for me to tell me that her car needs cleaning again. When she doesn't find me, she'd probably search the tents. When they tell her that they haven't seen me for about a year and eight days, she might get a tad worried. So all in all it'd probably take about four weeks before they found out I had died and maybe another year to discover what from. By then Mr. Sir will have fled the World, for a better, more cowboy-ish one, and nothing could be done. Wow, my future was bleak.

We drove back in silence, and I miraculously arrived alive. Mr. Sir was in a bit of a fouler mood than usual but I didn't have time to dwell on how much the truck shook when he slammed the door shut, because Pen came rushing to me.

"Your Aunt wants you," he said in a rush, opening the door and letting me out.

"Yeah I know and it better be one hell of an apology I'll tell you-"

"But I wanted to talk to you first," I looked at him.

Ooh someone was looking swish. He had removed his hat to show his flat combed hair. The sunscreen had been removed form his face, to show a pale complexion, his usual T had been replaced by a checked shirt and he was holding what I imagined in the real world would be flowers. Except out here there was no water, so really he was just holding some dry sticks.

"Where are you off to looking so snazzy? Got a hot date?"

He blushed "Well actually…yes,"

I felt my jaw hit the floor, it actually collided with the dirt.

"What you said about your Aunt was probably right. She does need some…you know,"

"Action?" I said awfully loudly. He shushed me

"Yes, yes."

Click.

It all slotted into place and then I screamed with laughter

"And you're the one to give it to her?" I gasped.

"What is so amusing about that?" he asked sternly.

"She will chew you up and spit you out," I said matter-of-factly.

"No Rachel. I think me and her could really have something,"

Awwww. He sounded so sincere and honest, I almost felt sorry for him.

"Well the thing I wanted to ask you about was…well, I was wondering if you would…" he blushed an attractive shade of beetroot.

"Yes?" I pushed.

"Well, your Aunt and I would…_busy _all night," I snorted and he (if possible) went redder, "Could you make yourself scarce?"

I paused and stared at him for a moment

"And where exactly to?" I asked with a tone.

"I thought you could stay in the boy's tent-"

"Whoa whoa whoa! No freaking way," I said putting my hands up in a 'nothing to do with me' kinda way. "What's wrong with this place eh? You're all touched in the head aren't ya?"

"Rachel please, think about how much happier your Aunt will be after tonight. How much easier she'll be to live with."

"What's the stuff for?" X asked me. I just ignored him and threw my things on the floor.

"Hey look it's Sunray!" Magnet joked. I pulled a tongue

"It worked though, I got the water," I said smirking. He nodded in a humble way and I smiled smugly.

"You didn't answer me," X-Ray said.

"I'm pretending to stay in here tonight so Penny can seduce Aunt Lou. And no I'm not joking, and yes you heard me right. I give it about an hour before he makes a move and then she susses out what he's after. Then a red hand-printed Pendanski will come in and tell me I'm allowed to go back." I shrugged. That was the most likely situation. And the only I reason I went along with Penny's crazy plan and brought some of my things into the tent.

It must have been two maybe three hours and I was twitchy. What was taking so long? Why hadn't Aunt Lou thrown Pen out yet? She wasn't really…?

Ugh

No, she may be a crazy scary cow but she had taste. And dignity.

I hoped.

Haha! The system worked!

A sullen faced black eyed Pendanski told me to return to my cabin soon after. When he left I whooped and did a little victory jig.

"Well, we'll have to rethink your nickname won't we? Something along the lines of Psychic? Gypsy?" X-Ray said jokingly. I froze mid-jig.

"Rethink? So you already have one for me?" I asked half cautious half excited.

Squid nodded.

"Magnet came up with it." Caveman said. My eyes swivelled expectantly to Magnet and I saw a bit of colour flush across his cheeks.

"Sunray," he mumbled.

Sunray?

Well it was… un sexist. A little odd, and not really a great sum up of me but…meh?

"Well cause you said the thing about the sunrays," Mag said trying to justify his decision. "It was funny,"

"And you were singing that sunshine song," Caveman added.

"And wearing all that sunny shit the other day," X pitched in.

"And your Aunt calls you Rae," Armpit mumbled from his cot, rolling rocks to hit each other.

We all looked at him. Even Zig seemed pretty interested.

"How do you know that?" he asked, flicking his wild blonde hair out of his bright eyes. Pit looked up from his rock game and shrugged.

"She's always calling you that," he said going back to the rocks.

"Okaaaaay," I said turning back to my previous conversation. "So Sunray?"

"Yeah do you like it?" Magnet asked biting his lip.

"Tough shit!" X-Ray said "We never had a choice, she's gotta live with it,"

"Awwww thank you darling," I said clasping my hands together in mock adoration "You are so _caring_! Looking after the sole girl here is deffo the way to win her heart," I said smiling sarcastically. I heard a mumbled 'fuck off' and decided it would be wise to depart.

"Ciao Darlings!" I cooed "Watch the light fade as the Sunshine slips away," I said sarcastically leaving the tent and preparing my excuse for where I had been. I had to convince her that it was purely coincidental that I had arrived moment after Penny had left.


	16. Kidnap

I am so so sorry for this chapter, its just to fill the void. I will rewrite it when am not in a bad mood. xox

I had come to the conclusion that if I stayed with Aunt Lou when she was in mega strop mode I would most likely die faster than if I stayed with the boys in the dehydrating, lizard infested desert. So spending a few weeks with them kinda brought us closer. However it brought me no closer to competing my mission, which, to be honest, I'd forgotten about. I'd taken up a little sport I like to call Hopper-in-Hopper-out which simply was jumping in the holes and jumping back out. The fun bit of the game was you were practically putting your life in the hands of fate, you didn't know what was in the hole or how dangerous it could be. I had gotten quite good at jumping out, my arms had grown stronger and I could do it quite fast now. (which was always a plus when those nasty scorpions turned out to be inhabiting certain holes)

So by the time I had calculated being there a three weeks I was getting used to how crap it was here. When the time came around that I was there for a month I was out for a stroll when I noticed my favourite tent digging oh so joyfully.

"Bonjour!" I sang happily.

"Hey Ray," came the tired out mumbled call of most of them They had shortened my nickname to Ray or Sunny, depending if they had enough energy to say two syllables instead of one.

"Ray," I heard Caveman's voice casually floating out of his hole some time later that day. "What do you know of Kissin' Kate Barlow?"

I froze.

Where had I heard that name?

I swear someone had said it before.

"No clue. Why?" I concluded would be a safe answer.

"Well surely you'd know being the Warden's niece?" he pushed.

"And why would that immediately suggest I would know?" I asked in a tone

"Well you know with all the posters in her cabin and everything," he answered.

Posters?

Which Posters?

"You know the ones that basically substitute the wallpaper?" he added when I didn't answer.

God.

Shows how observant I am.

"Never really noticed," I admitted, feeling rather idiotic. He laughed, but I was intrigued.

"What do _you_ know about Kiss me Kate?" I asked. I received a roar of laughter.

"Kissin' Kate," came the correction through fits of giggles.

Well sorry I was half way round the other side of the world when she decided to become famous.

"Yeah whatever," I tried to keep it cool.

"She was a teacher turned outlaw wasn't she?" Squid said.

"Yeah she used to live here didn't she?" Zigzag added.

I shrugged, clearly I didn't know. Teacher turned outlaw. Maybe that's where I had heard her name, I mean if she lived here once I'd imagine that'd be some gossip for a while.

"How long ago was this then?" I asked, not imagining anyone living _here _for a long time.

"100 years? At a guess," came the reply. I raised my eyebrows. Whoa.

God. I was so bored

Bored.

Bored.

Bored.

There wasn't even any clouds for me to ooh and aah at and by the time the water truck came I practically jumped into it, shutting the door behind me before the counsellor could even leave the truck. He looked at me and I just shook my head.

"Take me away. Seriously." I said looking at him with a stare that made him nearly put the pedal to the metal and floor it all the way back to camp. A voice, however, soon stomped out that idea.

"Water!" it called raspily, although I could not remember anyone so devoured of the precious liquid to speak as if their throat had been slit. "Please!" I saw it was Magnet, he as doing a spectacular impression of me when I was bored yesterday, clutching his throat and choking loudly. The counsellor filled his canteen up sharply and I wondered why X-Ray had let him go before him. Talking of X-Ray, I couldn't see him anywhere, he wasn't in line, or in his hole. I shrugged and turned around in my seat, facing the front again. I saw something out of the corner of my eye and looked at the drivers seat. I would've yelped if he hadn't of put his hand across my mouth.

"Shh!" he demanded "Where do you think you're going?" X-Ray asked sternly. I also would've answered if he hadn't of had his hand across my mouth. I casually pointed at it and he slowly removed it.

"I'm going back to camp," I whispered. "I'm bored,"

He shook his head and looked behind me. I had no chance to look behind me, before I had even began to turn my head the door behind me was opened, another hand snaked it's way around my mouth and I was dragged backwards into a hole. I saw X-Ray get into the water line, as the person who had dragged me so rudely, held me down and kept me quiet. A few moments later X-Ray jumped down into the hole.

"So you trying to escape from us?" he asked looking down upon me in a way that terrified me down to the soul. "Don't you know that no-one escapes from Camp Green Lake," he bet down, balancing on his feet, and lent down his face inches from my own terrified one. He nodded to the person behind me, they let go of me and clambered out of the hole I had been deposited in. I looked up to see who had been doing X-Ray's dirty work.

That Asshole.

"Does he tell you when to go to the bathroom too?" I called sarcastically after Armpit.

"Shh," X-Ray said to me. Kneeling down by me. "I only want you to stay. You are going to stay right?" his voice was gentle. But that scared me more. I slowly nodded. You'd have to be a fool to argue with this guy.

"Good," he grinned maliciously.

I went to sit up but he pushed me down

"Stay!" he yelled.

"Hey man, just let her go," Magnet said peering down into the hole.

"Are you arguing with me?" X-Ray yelled. "Cause if you are!"

"No man! I'm just saying why you keeping her here?"

"Excuse me?" he asked "But you were the one who was saying last night how you wanted her to-"

"All right all right keep her here, do what you want," Mag said leaving.

X-Ray turned back to me, madness in is eyes. I swear he'd taken something. I didn't care what he'd said earlier about there being parsley and herbs in the bags, he's on drugs.

"You've been here long enough Ray." he said "And I don't think you are pulling your weight. What are _we_ getting from _you_?"

"Er, my spectacular me-ness?" I ventured daringly.

"Well it's just not quite enough I'm afraid. You're going to need to give back a lot more," his eyebrows raised suggestively.

I decided I needed to leave quite soon if I was to stay alive. But how dare he? Who did he think he was kidnapping me? I wasn't just some hostage to be played with. I stood up, face to face with him and glared menacingly. He laughed cruelly and I decided that he was an asshole. So I accidentally collided my hand with his stomach. I took the opportunity to leg it as he doubled over in pain and surprise. I heard Magnet shouting after me

"Ray!" he called "He's having a breakdown Ray!" but I ran until I reached the cabin. Puffing and panting I stepped inside.


	17. Fetch Me an Onion

it may not sem like it but we're getting close to the romance bit wohooo! xox

Avoiding Tent D, or any other tent as the case may be, proved to be rather simple. True I turned into a bit of a hermit, but at least it kept my life out of jeopardy.

I stretched across the table from my chair and handed Lou the kitchen knife she had requested. She began crushing garlic cloves with the edge of the blade. She reached into an empty bowl and groped around the bottom. She sighed and turned to me.

"Rachel I need an onion," she said.

"You know where they are," I answered idly turning the page of my collection of perfect glossy pages littered with celebrity gossip and perfume advertisements (my magazine) "Don't need to tell me whenever you leave the House,"

"They're in the Mess Hall stock room," she continued, stirring a pot.

"Ooh, how nice," I answered, only vaguely wondering why on Earth she wanted me to know exactly where bloody onions were. I had just digested a wonderfully juicy piece of information about a film star who'd done some scandal when I felt the magazine rudely ripped from my grasp. I glanced up at the gossip-depriver to see Aunt Lou, mag in hand, cowboy boots tapping impatiently. I tried to continue reading the article by tilting my head and leaning towards it. She swung it up and hit my face.

"Get me an onion Rachel," she said walking back into the kitchen and hiding my entertainment in a cupboard

"How do I get in?" I moaned knowing it was locked at night to stop the rations being stolen. Not that anyone in their right mind would actually steal some of that junk they label food.

"Pendanski is holding a counsel session there. It'll be open." she answered, not even looking at me anymore. I sighed loudly and in an annoyed way and then left the Cabin mumbling. I was about halfway there when I stopped dead in my tracks. Pendanski? That was D-tents counsellor wasn't it? I growled angrily, just the people I was longing to see. As I got to the door i knocked politely, cause I was a nice person, then entered. The Mess room was a shabby building with a counter to collect food from and dirty tables that had been arranged to complete a circle in which the boys sat, Pen at the front, his back to the door. He turned at my entrance and looked at me questioningly. I simply smiled and pointed to behind the counter were a small stock room was, with the door ajar.

"Onions," I explained. As I walked, I felt eyes following me, when I passed X-Ray he leant back on his seat and caught my waist with his arm.

"Why don't you stay here for a bit?" he asked grinning his cheeky grin.

"Rex, Put her down," said Penny In his 'threatening' voice. X-Ray rolled his eyes and slipped his arm from around me and leant forwards again. I went into the stock room and discovered it wasn't as small as I had first thought. There was sacks, cupboards, shelves and drawers full of food. It was also a kitchen with an oven, hob and sink. I sighed, I would have to look everywhere for these wretched onions. I heard Pen talking to the boys and stood by the door out of sight, listening.

"What do you think would be a good career choice Ricky?" asked Pendanski. I stuck my head out, wondering who Ricky was. I hadn't been told their names due to my insistence of being told their nicknames instead of their real ones. I mean, when was I ever going to need their real names? It wasn't as if I was ever going to see them again. Right?

"A fireman?" Zigzag suggested. I smiled. Ricky suited the Asshole perfectly. A girl I knew back in England called Olivia went out with about four Rickys in a row and all of them broke her heart. The boys snickered at Zigzag's comment, and I understood. He had said that he'd been sent here for setting fire to a school.

"Yeah you'd be a fat lot of good wouldn't you Ziggy? You'd just stare at the flames!" said Armpit. I went over to a cupboard and started rooting through.

"Nah!" I called out into the room "He'd throw on a couple of matches to help it along the way," Zigzag wasn't the only one who could be a bitch. Laughter danced into the room and I could basically hear the wall melting behind me from the death glare Zig must've been aiming towards me.

"Rachel we do not encourage the boys to undermine each other," Pendanski called back

"I wasn't encouraging them," I said in my defence "I was doing it myself,"

Silence.

And then cheers.

"Quieten down boys," Pen continued "So a fireman…"

It was impossible.

Seriously I had looked in every single place where an onion would think of hiding. I sighed and sat on the counter by the hob. Onions. Onions. Where are the onions? Maybe if I tried the shelves. I climbed on top of one of the work surfaces and searched the shelves. The food stored there was minimally better than that in the cupboards, I could imagine that being used to feed the inmates but wouldn't touch the stuff myself. I had been fed the food that Aunt Lou ate, fruit, thick soup (which I guessed was the un-watered version of what the boys were given) and cookies. My mouth watered at the thought of the sweet chocolate chips and the crumbly, sugary pale biscuit.

Mmmmm.

I had been thinking so much about those cookies that when I slid across the counter I slipped. Only just catching myself from slamming painfully in the ground, I managed instead to make enough noise to wake my grandparents in England, and succeeded in hitting my head on an open cupboard.

"Balls!" I cried softly, carefully descending to the ground and rubbing my painful head.

"Are you alright in there?" asked Pen, obviously referring to my grand impression of a brass band practice gone wrong.

"Yeah," I called back, picking up the tins and pans from the floor. That was smooth.

Okay cupboards. Seven years out of date beans, something that looked like it was once an orange, but had now shrivelled to the size and the colour of a grape, and a packet of rice that was kind enough to be the only edible thing in the cupboard. But only barely. I cringed as I searched through the rest of the cupboards, holding my turning stomach in case it totally gave up on me and I spewed all over the place. I went through a couple of the drawers and found around fifty billion metal spoon that I couldn't imagine have been used once ever. I wondered if they were there for a special kind of punishment for an extra evil child who would be made to dig their holes with the spoons. I'd better be careful or else I'd end up digging with those silver spoons. Now that would be something to complain about.

Okay.

Think like an onion.

Like an onion.

Think oniony thoughts.

If I were an onion…I would hide….in a kitchen.

Well that much was obvious.

I heard footsteps, voices and a few 'hushings' going on. I ignored it and carried on my search.

Then I knew it!

The sacks!

Duh. Where else would it be? I strolled over to them and read the names on the sacks. There was potatoes, leeks (?) and onions! I jumped up and down in joy clapping my hands. I opened the sack, picked up an onion and let out the shrillest scream in the world, jumping back and dropping my onion in total terror.

Scorpions! Frillions of them! The weird thing was, when I screamed, I heard a crash in the Mess Hall behind me. Oh my god. Had I disturbed some sort of Mother of all Scorpions? I remember watching a film about a Scorpion King and shivered in fear. Seriously, if I was faced with something like that, I don't know what I'd do. I had no idea what to do _now_. If I moved into the Mess Hall, I'd be face to face with Mummy Scorpion, but if I stayed here I'd have to fight off about seventy families of Scorpions. Oh Bajebus, what ever could I do? I stood there rocking from the onion sack to the door into the Mess Hall in indecision.

Okay, here was what I was to do. Before the onion scorpions attacked, I'd grab that broom in the corner and make a run for it into the Mess Hall, swinging it and try to scare off the Big scorpion. Then a thought struck me, where the heck was Pendanski? Surely I'd hear his screams as the Huge Scorpy crunched his bones as he ate him?

"Mr Pen?" I called into the Hall "Are you still there?"

When there came no reply I began to panic. Were all the other boy's dead too? Ommigod Ommigod Ommigod! I felt tears well up in my eyes, they were the only people who were ever nice to me here. And I never even thanked them, sure they had been a bit grabby and insistent of my company, but I should have been flattered by their attention, not sullen. And okay the kidnapping in the hole thing really was scary, and Zigzag threatening to give away the Clicky game rules was insulting, but nevertheless they were still there for me, like protective (if not a little annoying) big brothers.

Okay, I had to get out of this alive. For them. So I could tell the world how bravely they fought against the huge evil Scorpion. I took a deep breath and ran into the Mess Hall.

Three things happened.

I stopped and dropped the broom in astonishment.

The two boys dropped to the floor holding their sides, rolling about laughing.

And my face grew as red as a red chilli pepper.

Balls.

Okay so maybe I overreacted little bit. But what was I supposed to think? My mind was bound to think strange things being stuck here for ages. Zigzag and Squid are Assholes. They thought it was horrifically funny when i ran out wielding my broom like a weapon, eyes wide and scanning the room in search of a huge Scorpion. Obviously, I did not. When they eventually got over their fit of giggles I looked at them suspiciously

"What are you doing?" I asked wearily, bending down to pick up the broom.

"We were going to scare you, but that was way more entertaining," Squid said breathlessly.

"Get lost," I said rolling my eyes and heading for the door.

"Oh come on Ray. You have to admit that was really funny," Squid said laughing again at the memory.

I grabbed the door handle and realised something. It wasn't opening. I tugged harder and the door just simply shook.

Oh God.

Nightmare's do come true.


	18. Cabin Fever

"You're not trying hard enough," Zigzag whined pushing past me and pulling the door with admirable strength. "Oh no," he said, turning slowly to Squid. "We're locked in."

"Move out of the way you pair of pussies," Squid moaned ramming into the door.

"Don't freaking break it!" I said trying to elbow myself in and grabbing the handle.

"Don't _you_ try," Zigzag said to me in a 'everything you touch turns to crap' way. I glared at him and tried getting in further. I felt his hand swipe my own off of the door handle and I tried to grab on to any piece of it I could. Between the three of us, grabbing, groping and tugging, it really was no surprise when we heard the fatal clatter that told us we had broken the bloody thing off. In total and compete unison, we glanced at the floor and watched in silence as the handle rolled about a bit before it came to an abrupt halt, leaving a ringing silence behind it. I, of course, broke it.

"Well what do you suggest now?" I said turning to face them and placing my hands on my hips.

"Chill out, I'll break the door down," Zig said backing away for a run up. I burst out laughing.

"You are not going to do any such thing," I said blocking his pathway "You'd break your shoulder or smash you face open and then who would get blamed eh? Me. And then I'd end up digging with those bloody silver spoons now wouldn't I?" I got a blinking response of blinks, which was most unhelpful.

"Look it's simple to smash a door down, or pick the lock," Zigzag said.

"Just try the windows yeah?" I asked sitting down on the sofa. If they were determined to be the Heroes in all of this, I had no qualms about sitting around as the damsel in distress. After a few moments of unconstructive banging and swearing I felt a body flop uselessly down next to me.

"Well isn't this just great," it said "Stuck inside a friggin canteen with you," I glared at him.

"You know you can go into the other room. You don't _have_ to sit next to me. For someone who's trying to avoid being near me, you're doing a hell of a lot to be around me," I answered in response.

"You know _you_ didn't have to come here in the first place, how much better would things be if you hadn't of turned up, messing everything around, shaking your hips so everyone will fall over themselves to please you. You can't have left thing the way they were can you?" his eyes were flashing as if he wanted an argument. I wasn't sure whether or not I was going to give him one.

"This is what this is all about?" asked gently "The fact that I came here and _changed_ everything? Is it that you don't like change?"

"I'm fine with change," he snapped "I can handle it. Just only when its good,"

"Well I'm sorry my coming here was a change for the worst." I answered in a don't-pick-a-fight-cause-I-can't-be-arsed tone. "But I didn't really have any choice, I was sent here not knowing what I was facing and…"

I trailed off. He knew the rest of the story, he didn't need, or want, me to repeat it all. He shifted uncomfortably.

"And then I act like a total prick cause I'm a crazy lunatic,£ he aid rolling his eyes as if that was what I was going to suggest.

"No," I said, in a reply "You're not. I don't know your history Zig but something must have made you so scared and suspicious of everything," I said in my 'psycho-analysis' voice. He flicked his eyes up to meet mine. They had never been so icily piercing and clear before. I waited for a sarcastic or snide remark now that I'd let my own wall of scorn and irony down. Thinking he'd see it as a weakness and prey on it. I was surprised when I found out he did the opposite and saw my sensitivity as an invite to share his own.

"When I was sixteen," he began slowly and unsurely, as if he didn't now how to word it, throughout tough he gained confidence and built up speed "she got sick and then six months later she was gone. My mum. I guess after that things just seemed to directed towards me t was like someone was punishing me for losing her, letting her die. That's when it started really, the paranoia, always worrying about who was going to leave me next. My step dad? My dog? My friends? I mean it was like I had done something to repel these people, they just kept leaving me," he stopped and took in a breath, steadying his slightly trembling voice. "So I snapped and started trying to find something to calm me. I found flames strangely soothing, watching the flames flicker and dance around, it was amazing how fast it could attack and rule over stuff, amazing how red fire can be but also so blue," his own blue eyes were flickering excitedly as if they were flames themselves. "It sort of completed something inside of me, filled a hole deep down where I could never usually reach without the heat. It was claming. But I got riled when things weren't alight, it didn't feel right, something was missing something wasn't there to complete me. So when this ass of a sub starts on at me about being late I start to wonder why he's having such a bitch about this, is he out to get me? Someone must have sent him to get at me, who is sending people for me? So I decided I needed to cleanse the class of him, it would be better if he was out of the way and out of my mind. And I burnt the place down. I didn't think it would matter, I didn't think it was wrong. I just threw that tiny wooden stick onto that little trickle of liquid and bam, it went up, so fast, so quick. I wish it had gone on longer, so I could watch the flames for one last time." he shrugged "They didn't know I wanted to trap the sub in there, they just thought it was another crazy pyromaniac kid who'd got bored. That's fine with me, shorter sentence I have to serve. So now I'm here, getting accused of being a lunatic," his eyes flicked up to mine and I saw a jokey glare in them. I grinned through my shock, I had not realised he'd felt all that. His face was growing larger and I couldn't quite figure out why, then I realised it was getting closer to me. Only when it was inches from my own face I realised he wanted to kiss me. I made a sharp decision to quickly move away and he looked confused and hurt. I shook my head.

"Just because you spin me some sob story about you practically being an orphan doesn't change anything. You're still an asshole to me,"

"But I thought-" he started, his expression slowly evolving from hurt to anger.

"What? You thought that after everything you'd done to me, after you treated me, that I would magically fall in love with you because you had a tough life?" I asked. He stood

"Hey!" he said "You treated me like crap too! It was a two way thing,"

"Only because you treated me so badly first. What was I supposed to do? Take it lying down? Not react and let you win? That would make me easy prey, easy to mess with. Do you honestly think that status is an option for me to hold here?" I replied standing too "Did you think I would just start on you for no reason? why wouldn't I have gone for someone-" I stopped as it slid so comfortably in place "You _did_ think I chose you? You think I set myself a target to irritate and it was you?" I asked softly.

"You didn't?" he asked in confusion.

"No! I only acted like a bitch cause you were being funny around me from the very beginning." I answered. Understanding clouded his face for a moment and then he sat down.

"Well the windows are all closed and firmly locked. The only way I can think if budging them is smashing them with-" Squid said coming back into the main room and stopped short at me standing and Zigzag sitting, looking disheartened and crushed. "What's going on?" he asked slightly confused.

"Nothing" I sighed heading to the door and trying to slot the handle back into it's frame. Mumbling from behind told me Zig was clueing Squidy in on what had happened. I was desperately and uselessly jamming the handle onto a stick that did not exist in the world, whis,t listening to the slightly rising voices behind me.

"What did you expect? For her to immediately forgive you and be all over you?" Squid was hissing.

"What? Are you and her in alliance now? You got your own thing going on? I thought there was something between you two. Ever since you lent her your water. You're secretly together aren't you?" Zigzag asked suspiciously.

"You're paranoid," Squid answered simply but harshly. Ouch. After all Zig had explained to me that must have hit him hard.

"Just because you don't know what it's like to love someone!" Zigzag shouted. Whoa. Love is a very strong word here.

"Okay!" I decided intervening time had come around to play. "I think the pressure of being trapped in a confined space is getting to us and making us say thing we don't mean, yes? Yes. So if we just sit down and…I don't know, play a game? Then maybe we can chill out for a little bit okay?" I said in my best 'dealing with the insane' voice, that I'm pretty sure Pendanski used on me, my first day here. That seemed so far away now, it seemed like years ago. I had been partially accepted since then. Well at least given a nickname.

"What 'game' do you suggest?" Squid's agitated voice brought me back to reality.

"_Not_ the Clicky Game for the love of god," Zigzag said. I pouted, I loved the Clicky Game.

"Fine. We could Count Cows?" I suggested.

"Oh yeah alright then. Umm…none. I win, next game," Zigzag answered sarcastically.

"Ah I see." Squid answered thoughtfully "So _that_ is where I am going wrong. I didn't realise you had to be a sarcastic asshole to win a girl's heart. Thanks for steering me right Zig." Squid rolled is eyes to emphasise his own sarcasm. I was glad he was sticking up for me, but I wish he wouldn't do it so cruelly to Zigzag. I wasn't eve sure why I cared what his attitude to Zigzag was, I just seemed to see Zig more sensitive and more fragile than before. Knowing his illness was caused by grief and not by him being an idiot and convincing himself into it or something I felt a bit more inclined to be nicer to him, or at least look out for him a little more. So I turned and banged on the door loudly and forcefully.

"We're gonna be fine," I said determinedly through gritted teeth an hour later.

"Will you _please_ stop saying that," Squid said through his hands that were covering his face.

"No but we will! Because Aunt Lou is going to realise that it doesn't take AN HOUR TO GET A FRICKIN ONION!" I shouted at the door. Clearly the cracks were beginning to show.

"You could have least given me a chance," Zigzag was mumbling, as he had been doing for a while now. "It's not as if I'm violent or an awful person. I mean I opened up earlier on. To _you_. I'd never done anything like that to _anyone_ ever in my life!" I would have listened to this little speech, even responded to it. But I already had. He just kept repeating the same ting again and again, he wasn't even looking at me when he said it anymore, it was directed at the kitchen now. I would've been worried except I had my own issues to be concerned about, like trying to escape from this death trap.

"Zig just shut up!" Squid said "This is _your_ fault," he said glaring at me "If you hadn't of frickin made him like you then he would be a little more saner right now,"

"Excuse me?" I answered "I didn't 'make him like me'. I can't help it if I'm irresistible!" I said back angrily.

"No but you had be all _nice_ and _amazing_, how did you expect anyone to _not_ fall for you, you fool. You are the only girl for the next one hundred miles, all the way around." Squid draw a huge circle around himself "And most of these guys haven't had a chance in hell _outside_ of camp." he raised his eyebrows.

"Ok calm down," I said, fighting right now was not a good idea.

"I'm just saying, didn't you expect this?" he asked as if I was a idiot. Which I wasn't, clearly.

"Will you two shut up!" Zigzag said waving his arms around in an annoyed manner. "I am trying to make an apology here," he rolled his eyes as if _we were the crazy ones then went back to muttering to himself._


	19. Zigzag's Life Goal

Reviewers make smile!! Hehe thank you all so much. Well with coursework, essays to write and visiting new york (woohoo!) I haven't had much chance to write any of this

"Go fish!" I yelled winning the game.

Obviously.

"We're playing solitaire bum face," Squid answered.

"Well whatever it is I'm winning," I answered.

"What's your favourite colour?" Zigzag asked, tilting his head to one side, making him look kinda cute.

"I never really thought about it before." I said thinking and looking at him. His eyes were the most amazing piercing blue in the entire universe. They were like sapphire's frozen in ice, wanting to sparkle forever, cold and just waiting to melt. "Blue," I said automatically, not even thinking of my answer. Then ripped my unblinking eyes from his when I realised they were…well, unblinking.

"Yours?" I asked

"Red," he said darkly. I should've known the arsonist would pick the hottest shade on the colour spectrum.

I nodded subtly when a thought hit me.

"How did you two even get us locked in here?"

"Er well the door was locked when we were inside," Squid said sarcastically.

"I meant how did you evade the almighty sharp reflexes and senses of Penny boy?" I asked "I'm sure he would have counted you lot as you left,"

"Ah yes," Squid answered looking immensely proud "well, when you're as smart as me, these things don't take long to conjure up inside ones head." he said smiling wickedly. "Me and Zig left the cabin so he counted us and we took our opportunity when Magnet nicked Pendanski's hat we took our opportunity to sneak back in. I guess your screams from the kitchen muffled out the sound of the door being locked,"

"It was nice of Pendanski to forget I was in here wasn't it?" I asked aloud, silently thanking the boy's immaturity. If they hadn't of tried to jump out at me and stayed in here I would have been locked in all by myself. On my own

With the scorpions!

I reddened in embarrassment at the memory of running in brandishing a broom against an imaginary giant scorpion. What was I thinking?

"We could smash the window?" suggested Squid glancing around."No don't," I said in alarm. "If you break government property, especially something in a frickin' juvie, then your sentence can actually be lengthened!" I said. Not that i knew any of this was true, I just didn't want them to go around breaking stuff. "All right all right," squid rolled his eyes and tried to screw the handle back on the door yet again. I felt a strange sensation in my fingers for a moment, as if being entwined by something. The sensation grew stronger and tighter around my hand and i realised the feel of roughness against my skin. I decided to look down and discover what the heck was going on with my hand, but subtly of course, I didn't need to wrench my hand up to my face screeching and thoroughly inspecting it like the crazy woman I was. These guys didn't need to see anymore of my lunatism. So I just glanced down and then back up again. And then back down What? Zigzag had for some reason decided that it would be a good idea to hold my hand. God knows why. So i casually slipped out of his grasp to scratch my unitchy nose. He sighed impatiently and turned to face me. "But I'm hot!" he complained, as if that was the answer for all the world's grievances. "Being hot doesn't mean I fancy you," I replied calmly, watching with amusement as Squid was having an unsuccessful fight with the door handle. Kicking the solid wood, ramming the handle into the place it usually went on an unbroken door. "Well it should," Zig said. "Did you now that you are my new project?" he asked calmly

"What?" I asked in defeat

"Pendanski is always telling us to set aims for ourselves, that way we have something to reach for and purpose in our lives." he nodded wisely "So my aim is to make you fall in love with me," he grinned happily.

Oh god.

That means avoiding him at all costs in the future.

"Personally," he continued "I don't think it's going to be such a difficult task to complete." I think he was talking to himself but I nodded to be polite "Because clearly there is a spark between us. True it's quite a negative one at the moment, but that will surely be turned around after a bit of persuasion." now I actually _hoped_ he was speaking to himself "So all I have to do is act amazing and a bit less like an ass" he smiled to himself, nodding as he went. I just smiled and slid away slowly, towards he slightly less crazy child in the room. Only slightly though.

"Bloody bloody door doesn't bloody open cause some bloody fool locked us in here,"

"Hey, he's your bloody fool," I answered

"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh," he yelled banging his head on the door. It made a hollow clunk and I looked at him. He glanced up at me and laughed at my expression.

Suddenly I heard a scuttling and a yelp from the kitchen. Zigzag came into the canteen shaking his hand painfully. It had swollen and was reddening. On closer inspection I found a tiny puncture hole admist the deepest shades of red.

"_What_ were you doing?" asked Squid as I rooted around for a first aid kit or something.

"Trying to catch a scorpion," he murmured. I froze on my tiptoes, my fingers inches from a pile of bandages and a tube of cream.

"Why were you-"

"I was going to throw it at Sunray," he said calmly.

"You what?" I asked wheeling round.

"Yeah, it was going to be a surprise, but it bloody stung me," he waved is red and doubled in size hand to indicate the scorpions attack.

"Why in the name of flying pyjamas would you decide to throw a scorpion at me? What happened to your aim?" I asked in screechy voice that sounded like a crazed person

"I was trying to fulfill my aim!" he said in an annoyed voice "You love scorpions!"

"Even if I did," I said though gritted teeth "Which could not be further from the truth, no-one would want on of those hideously, dangerously horrific beasts _thrown _at them!"

"Okay maybe we all need to calm down yeah?" asked Squid.

"Maybe we all need to-" Zigzag began in an angry voice but stopped as we all clearly heard the unmistakable click of a lock being unlocked. The door crept open and X-Ray, Magnet and Armpit stood there beckoning us to come out, whilst keeping out watch at the same time.

"But-" I said in disbelief.

"Come on!" Magnet said.

"How did you-?" Squid asked whilst we left the canteen at an unbelievable speed, feeling the freedom of the night air was incredibly fulfilling. Now I knew how criminals felt when being released from jail. It was pure brilliance.

"We nicked the key when we saw Pendanski lock the door after you two went in," X replied smiling at me. This didn't erase the fact that he had kidnapped me, I hope he realised.

"Then why did it take you so long!" enquired Zig.

"We had a few…complications," Armpit answered crinkling his expression in a way that told us we didn't want to know, and even if we did he wouldn't tell us.

"Hold it," I said before they locked the door again. I raced inside, grabbed an onion from the sack, dodging any scorpions that may still be denning in there, and dodged back out.

"Okay go," I said

"What the onion for?"

"Eating," I answered simply.

"Right, you guys get back in the tent I'll put the key pack as best I can," Magnet said. X-Ray looked majorly put out that Mags was speaking as if he was the leader, but before he could complain Senor Spanish had raced off. I nodded to the guys and turned to walk away. My next move was to explain to Lou why I took so long to fetch her her god dam onion, which, as far as I was concerned, better taste sweeter than God's breath.

An=I know its horrific but i needed to put SOMETHING up here. so the scorpion thing was Ziggy's way of saying 'okay i am really getting chlostrephophic (sp?) here, give me attention, or you know something like that. its just to show that his illness can really effect his actions and convince him that what he is doing is right and sane. it wasnt meant to be stupid but it probably turned out that way. :-S anyways, need to write the next one so any pointers or suggestion would be fabby! Danke!


	20. Kissin' Kate Barlow

A/N: Well it is official. I hate exams and GCSE's which I'm certain I hath failed. I watched Holes again the other day cause my mate Gi wanted to and it got me in the mood to write some more of this fanfic J. So here you are my pretties. Enjoyeth.

As I walked in I noticed for the first time the amount of posters littering the walls. It was crazy. Kate Barlow this, robbery that. I stood reading one of them.

_Infamous Outlaw Kissin' Kate Barlow strikes again. The growing fame or, infamy as it may be, of Kissin' Kate Barlow, teacher turned outlaw has taken Texas by storm. Katherine Barlow was the reason for the newly furnished Schoolhouse in the picturesque town of Green Lake._

Hold on _Green Lake_? As in _here_? What was going on?

I continued reading it.

_She persuaded the Onion Picker, Sam, to fix the roof, windows, door, desks and floor of the Schoolhouse in exchange for peaches and, a more secret exchange, kisses. Miss Katherine was spotted kissing the negro Onion Picker, who was later shot for this crime. In outrage and with a lust for revenge, Katherine killed the Sheriff of Green Lake and left her trademark of a kiss on his cheek. The history of this outlaw has intrigued the entirety of Texas, is she the cold blooded killer we all see her to be? Or just another victim of a frozen heart?-_

"Rachel!" came a surprised call. I spun quickly to see Aunt Lou covering herself up with a blue denim blouse. "What happened to you?"

"Your stupid fool of an employee forgot I was in the Canteen and went and locked me in didn't he?"

"Pendanski?" she asked in disbelief.

"Yes?" he asked coming out of her bedroom.

Uch.

With no top on.

I did a double take.

What?

I was lost for words, I couldn't even form a baffled nonsense sentence.

"Ew," was all that left my mouth. I walked towards my bedroom but caught sight of another poster

_Kissin' Kate Barlow Robs Chicago Pacific _

And did a 180 degree turn.

"What's with the posters Auntie Louise?" I asked in my most innocently innocent voice.

"The…what?" she asked clearly confused that wasn't in major rant mode about Penny and the fact that his chest had way to much hair for a human. I shuddered at the thought.

"About," I squinted my eyes as if I was reading her name for the first time "Kissin Kate Barlow?" I asked. "Did you know her? Was she-" I paused feeling a strong sense of déjà vu wash over me. And then I remembered walking in on her cradling a lipstick tube that she claimed to be Kissin Kate Barlow's. Oh yes, and she said she owned something Aunt Lou wanted? Well the only thing I can imagine an Outlaw having that I would want would be all the money she stole. Maybe Aunt Lou's after the treasure.

Oh my God.

That's why the boys dig holes!

Oh yes, there is a genius in the cabin, and her name is Rachel.

But then I steadied myself, better not rush ahead here, as I have been known to over think things and race to irrational conclusions. I sure as hell didn't need reminding of the Giant Scorpion episode that had taken place earlier this evening. So I just smiled, mumbled "never mind," and went into my room. Rooting out the arm destroyer also known as the emergency phone charger.

Whizz, whizz whiz.

Oh that made a really funny noise!

Thankfully the Hopper-in-Hopper-out game that I had invented had strengthened my arms to the point where I didn't feel like a Pirate with a hook for a hand instead of an actual hand for a hand. Anyways, a private call made in whispers was soon to take place.

"Hey Mama," I said once I heard the familiar chaos that usually resided in our house as she picked the phone up on the other end.

"Rach!" she said excitedly "How's it going? When can I come see my sister?"

"Err…about that." I said cautiously "I've sort of had a lot going on over here, and I haven't exactly found the time to persuade her that you're fabulousa yet, and it's also kind of impossible to persuade a psychotic psycho anything at all.

"Okay, I understand that she's a little bit insane because of all the digging and the obsession with-. Yeah. But can't you at least try my dear?"

"You see mother, that is why I rang. This obsession wouldn't have anything to do with Kissin Kate Barlow would it?"

Silence

I continued "Or the riches and wealth that she stole and presumably buried in the place that was once her home town?" When I said it out loud it sounded so much clearer and seemed to make so much sense that I almost didn't need my mother's confession that it was true and I was right.

Almost.

"What has she told you?" Mother asked slowly and carefully, so that she wouldn't give anything away.

"Not a speckle, but I figured it out for myself Mother Dearest. You don't have to say it you know, I'm already aware of my own almighty intelligence,"

"And almighty modesty as it seems," Mum answered sardonically, being the smarmy git that she is.

"Well I'm right aren't I?" I asked defensively.

"Look Rachel don't go all power hungry and end up like your Aunt. You've seen first hand where greed and obsession with money can get you."

"But I was right?" I persisted.

"Yes," mum answered quietly.

"Yes what? Sorry I didn't catch the last part," I was going to make her say it.

"Yes you were right," she snapped.

"You see that's what thought you said," I answered nodding, although, being a phone call, she couldn't see that, but I think she got the message. "Well that's all I needed to hear. See ya,"

"Wait!" mum called "Don't you want to talk to your father or Noah?"

"Not particularly," I answered making a face "I've got so much to do here!" I said

"Like what?" Mother demanded.

"Uh, sleeping for one!" I answered. "Good night Mama," I said and hung up before she could protest further. It wasn't a lie per se, I was extremely tired from my dramatic ordeal locked in the Canteen, but I was going to devise a plan to find the treasure and bring it back home. We sure as hell could use a booster for Mum's business, or maybe we would have enough to move back to England and set up a fashion store there, Mum wouldn't need a big break. We'd have enough money for _her_ to offer big breaks to aspiring new fashion designers. And I could get out of this place once and for all. Yeah it had been…interesting and I'd met a few awesome people like Magnet and Squid but I wouldn't stay here by choice.

In the end I fell asleep before any major treasure hunting plans could be put onto paper.


	21. Sandstorms and Confessions

**A/N: Uber mega sorry for the ridiculously stupid wait. I just hate computers so so much. Too many excuses for me to list just hope y'all forgive me. And also sorry for this horrific chapter I hate it and want to burn it but writers block is a disease that attacks people mercilessly and I am plagued. I will try to be a lot less crap next time. Promise. Danke my lovlies. So far I have tried to follow the storyline as best as I can, but here I've added an event that didn't happen in the book or movie. I just thought it would vary the routine of waking, digging, eating then sleeping. It also gives Zig a chance to try some of his moves out :-P.**

Whatever foolish goose invented the imbecilic notion of alarms needs shooting in the fingers. When your dreams are plagued with swimming in golden coins and sparkly jewels and diamonds, the last thing you desire to ring inside your head at the corrupt am of 4.30 is that infuriatingly vexatious screech of an alarm. However the hell Aunt Lou has not swung a shovel across someone's unfortunate features I do not know.

I was hoping to catch a few rays today and maybe inspect some holes in the hope of discovering an odd treasure chest or two, just by chance, but my daily plans were shattered when I stepped outside the cabin and discovered a dusty orange sandstorm ripping it's way through the Camp.

Huffily and in a somewhat annoyed manner I slammed my way back into the cabin and stood at the door for a few moments, arms folded and scowling, Aunt Lou emerged from her bedroom pulling on another manish style shirt over a tank top, she paused one arm in the sleeve the other halfway, to look at me. For the first time since I had met her she looked scared, maybe actually showing compassionate emotion for another human being, which for her had to be difficult. But as quickly as it had came, it went. Her usual stern composure returned rapidly and she carried on strolling towards me.

"What's crawled into your pants?" she asked . And with a straight face. Which meant that, no, she was not trying to make a crap attempt at saying something witty and amusing, but asking me in her own weird and odd way 'what the face was for'. I didn't bother with a response as she didn't seem to require one, she just strode past me outside and then seconds later came back in, full of orange dust. She scowled at me for not warning her then stormed into her room. I half expected her to start singing 'I Hate Everything About You,' which would not surprise me one bit. She emerged with her walkie talkie yelling at poor Penny who must have snook out earlier.

Shudder.

"Well what do you suggest?" she was screeching.

Jesus, you'd think it was him who'd told the weather to blow up a storm in the camp the way she was speaking to him.

A crackle of a response was heard coming through the modern (snigger) brick-sized black talkie.

"If they found anything they would not be able to see it Pendanski," she said through gritted teeth, rolling her eyes irritably. There was a indistinguishable reply, then she exploded. "Just get here!" she yelled "And bring the rest of those idiotic workers with you," she sighed angrily and thrust the walkie talkie to the other side of the room.

"Trouble in paradise?" I asked idly, carefully placing myself upon the kitchen table and rummaging through my bag that was still there from the first day. Peering inside I found a black digital watch, a comic and cat worming tablets. I must have picked up Noah's bag instead, but the cat worming tablets really vexed me, we didn't have a cat. My confused thoughts were punctured when I realised that Aunt Lou had been glaring at me and continued to do so for a full seventeen minutes until there was a knock on the door.

"You bloody took your time," she sniffed as six or seven counsellors plus Mr Sir bundled through the door.

"Rachel go and take a swim or something," Lou said waving her arm vaguely towards the door. I was halfway through obeying her when I asked myself why the hell I was bowing to this psycho's needs?

There was another flaw in her genius plan.

"And where the hell do you suggest I 'take a swim'?" I asked angrily spinning to face her. "In the lake?" I asked sarcastically.

"Well either contribute to the solution or make yourself _scarce_." She hissed angrily.

"Alright then," I answered plonking myself down on a seat next to one of the counsellors. She gave me a look and I explained "I'm contributing to the solution,"

"God help," she begged in annoyance. But sat down nonetheless and mentioned no more of my existence. "What do you propose we do?" she asked the faces around here. "In this storm the boys wouldn't be able to see the shovel in front of their faces, never mind what they're digging up."

"But we can't afford to lose an entire day of digging!" one pinched face counsellor said. "That's-" he paused and began a calculation on his hands. An entire twenty seconds later he surrendered and exclaimed "A lot of holes!"

I stifled my laughter not wanting to aggravate any murderous counsellors.

"Anyways," Mr. Sir growled "The point is, is it worth sending them out today and risk them not seeing a thing, I mean it would be as productive as not sending them out at all."

"But the holes would still get dug right?" another counsellor pitched in "After the winds let up we could check the holes,"

"Then we would have to keep track of all the new holes that would have been dug, which would be difficult enough, but nearing impossible in that wind storm. Plus there's a chance that the sands could be blown back into the holes filling them up and covering any findings." These counsellors were not as stupid a they looked, some of these arguments being put foreword weren't too bad.

"Why don't we just let them dig the holes again if they get filled up. But not making them dig they'll become suspicious, they should serve their 'punishment' no matter what the weather right? It would be risky just to let them off."

"No, it would be more of a risk to let them dig. Like Gilsele said, some of the holes could be filled in and if we make them dig in the same holes another day it's another wasted day. If something is there then fine, but if it isn't then we would have lost an entire day and a chance of finding anything in another spot!" although his wording was odd this guy made the best point. I decided to help him out.

"Aunt Lou, If you're worried about 'losing your rep' if you let the guys off the hook for the day why don't you set them a less… 'outdoorsy' but equally evilly malicious task to complete." I noticed my stupid English accent sounded more pronounced and 'Private schoolish' when taking the piss out of Aunt Lou. But amazingly enough I wasn't mauled by some secretly and cunningly hidden guard dogs for my disrespectful remark. She actually looked to be considering the idea.

"I believe being forced in your company would be an equally malicious task for anyone Rachel," she answered.

Bitch.

"What?"

"They shall have to baby-sit you. See how many of them manage to stay sane. See how many you send to the loon-bin."

My God.

She was totally mental.

Who said loon-bin anymore?

"I'd rather not," I answered simply. "Not the entire camp anyways. Unless you want to be responsible for becoming a great Aunt I think that may not be the wisest of decisions."

"Just D-Tent then! You seem to be in the pants of half of them anyways!" she shouted suddenly "Just get out of my sight you stupid child!"

Right wacko's officially gone mad.

"You do know," I said strolling out of the room "That 'beastly child' would have had a _much_ more scarring result than 'stupid'," I said rolling my eyes at the obviousness of it all. I had been called stupid many many times before, it didn't have any effect whatsoever on me. I found that comparing someone to something you'd refer a savage, wild animal to, achieved a much more offended reaction than simply insulting their intelligence.

D-tent.

Why did that woman hate me so?

"Because I refused to be her slave."

I recited a line from The Crucible. My famous play which I should return to England for.

Ha!

Return to England?

I'd be lucky to return to blinkin' San Antonio at this rate.

I felt a strong sense of homesickness rush over me.

And now I had to face Zigzag and one of his crazy schemes to make me fall for him.

Jesus that child was a bloody liability if I ever met one. I opened the door to the cabin and held my breath.

Compared to living with Aunt Lou though, the wind storm was a walk in the park.

"Bonjour miei amici, how are we hoy?" I asked, then gasped. "Oh my gosh! That was _four_ different languages. I'm like…quatrilingual!" I proclaimed.

"Polyglot," Magnet retorted, not even glancing up at my arrival.

"What did you call me?" I asked accusingly.

Was that some kind of Texan insult I wasn't aware of?

Did it mean prostitute? Or snotty cow or something?

"Polyglot. Or multilingual." he finally looked up from his oh-so-important rock equivalent of dice throwing. "Not quatrilingual, I don't think that's even a word." he continued. Since when did he become an Oxford graduate in the correction of multilinguistic diction?

Oh sorry, I meant _polyglot _diction.

Smart ass.

"I think it is," I shot back "Google it,"

He shot me a glance as if to ask where the computer was.

"Well if you guys hadn't of broke it in the Wreck room then you would _have_ a computer. Anyways, you're not digging today." I said perching myself on the edge of a thin matressed bed.

"Why didn't you say that in the first place?" X-Ray demanded jumping up "Instead of bloody arguing about languages!"

"Slipped my mind," I shot a glare at Magnet "But that freakin wind storm has caused controversy. Tent leaders had a meeting about it and everything. I voted for you not to dig so you're welcome." I rolled my eyes sarcastically.

"This is awesome!" X-Ray exclaimed happily. "We have a day off!"

"You're so thoughtful Ray-ray," Zigzag materialised beside me, grinning scarily. "Thank you," he said squishing me into a hug .

I laughed uneasily. "No problem Zig." I tried to free myself form his vice-like grip.

We were transferred into the Canteen because the wreck room was 'too far away,' which translated from Pennish into English meant 'We don't want you to have fun on your day off so you can stay in the canteen suckers whilst we go shopping'.

Roughly.

I decided to dodge Zigzag to speak to Squid.

About Zigzag.

"What is with him? One minute he's a complete asshole to me, then he's trying to win my heart? It's like as soon as he told me about his mum a switch was turned form love to hate!" I exclaimed to Squid.

"You're asking me?"

"Well you are his best mate aren't you?" I asked sincerely.

Squid shrugged "Yeah but we're _guys,_ we don't talk about that sort of stuff." I slumped down in resignation. "He talks to Caveman about that crap." he added matter-of-factly. I shot up

"Why didn't you say that in the first place?" I huffed skipping towards Caveman, giving him my best suggestive smile.

Instead of looking persuaded and ready to spill everything he knew on the subject, he just looked worried.

"Hi Caveman," I simpered, not being deterred by his lack of enthusiasm, "So I heard you know some slight gossip on Ziggy's problem with me." I grinned, jutting my chin out and scrunching my eyes up. He sighed.

"When you first came…" I grinned knowing I had won and settled down to listen to his epic.

Armed with both sides of the story I felt confident striding towards Zigzag's tall back as he was laughing at something somebody had said.

I intrigued him. I thought smugly.

I, _me, _boring Rachel Brookes from merry old England, had managed to stir the curiosity of a paranoid arsonistic juvenile delinquent. And that simple fact fascinated and tickled me beyond reasonable reason. So Zigzag was going to have to deal with the consequences of telling Caveman that small fact, and the rest of his…feelings towards me. Deal with it in a way that I would not stop pestering him until he confirmed and explained it to me. Which, after his recent declaration, I wasn't altogether convinced it would be too much of a bother with me hanging around him like a bad smell. Nevertheless I tapped him on the shoulder and he spun. He was so tall that he towered over me, looking down upon me with a questioning arch of his blond eyebrow.

"Yes?" he asked, a hint of amusement in his voice.

"Apparently," I said softly "The source of your hate and animosity for me in the early stages of my appearance, was down to a simply spout of curiosity," I said simply. He blinked and then slowly he grinned.

"Been talking to Caveman?" he asked.

I shrugged innocently "We had a fleeting conversation," he nodded unconvinced.

"True, you…had me curious." he said slowly, deeply.

"How so?" I asked. He sighed.

"You were the first girl I'd seen in…well a while. So you know, naturally…" he changed tack "And you were so weird! You just came up with these random sayings about giant rabbits or quotes from your almighty play. I didn't know what to think about you, so when the guys starting swooning I just…got defensive…"

Penny danced into the room at that moment, being the intrusive little shite that he was, and skipped into a separate room.

"What's he doing?" I asked curiously.

"Oh he's convinced himself that he's ill all the time, so he takes like twelve tablets each day. He's not sick, he's just certain he is. A hypo-something."

"Hypochondriac," Magnet piped in. I did a double take, where the hell were these words coming from?

I nodded in uninterest, vaguely watching though the clear glass Pen popping pill after pill into his mouth. I only took full notice when he swallowed one that looked oddly familiar. It was a sort of bright blue and circular. I pushed it to the back of my mind.

"So?" I asked Zig "You're defences sprang up?"

**Next chappy doesn't finish on a pointless note. I think. **


	22. CIA mission

His bright grin nearly knocked me out and I found myself smiling back at him. "Yeah I guess they did." he shrugged "Sorry I guess." And that did it. That actually made my eyes bug out, my crazy paranoid love interest had apologised. I suddenly felt quite happy about everything, despite the fact that I was still stuck in the middle of a Texan desert that had been turned into a detention camp, looking for treasure that belonged to a heartbroken schoolteacher/outlaw one hundred years ago. And that simple reminder deflated my entire spirit.

"So we're like, cool now?" I asked carefully. He nodded. Awesomes. I noticed the guys had drifted off into their own worlds and decided it may be a good idea to join them. I replayed the past few hours over in my head. My thoughts for some reason kept refering back to Penny's tablets and their annoying familiarity, where the hell had I seen them before? And it wasn't exactly a sight you saw everyday in a desert, a heck load of tablets. It was those pissy little blue ones that had me vexed. But why? Why?

Holy crap it came to me!

"Cat worming tablets!" I screeched in triumph. I realised Armpit had been in the middle of a story when I revealed my discovery to them all.

"Que?" Mag asked. Even Zig looked at me weirdly.

"The tablets, Penny was taking." I said quietly. Raised eyebrows was my response.

"What you on about?" X-Ray said grinning his sideways grin.

"They looked just like some cat worming tablets my brother put in my bag." I shrugged.

There was a moments pause "Then your cats gonna be in trouble if his tablets are here." grinned Squid. Zigzag fist bumped him. I looked at them for a moment and wondered how I never noticed how close they were.

"Oh we don't have a cat, never have."

Their attention quickly turned back to Armpit who continued his story. "Then when he ran through the door he ran straight into the saran wrap and decked it completely. It was awesome!"

It took me a while to realise that we were sharing practical jokes.

I wasn't cool enough to play jokes on people, nor brave enough. The best I'd managed was telling people they'd dropped their pockets and snickering when they looked on the floor. And even then I'd scarper away in fear that they'd beat me up.

"That's nothing Pit." X-Ray boasted "One time I hid in a cupboard for an hour just to jump out on my roommate with a mask on. You should have seen his face!" I doubted X had hid in a cupboard for an hour just to scare someone. And I doubted even more that he'd ever had a roommate that wasn't his mum.

As they compared outrages prank with outrages prank, they became more and more unrealistic and I zoned out again, with their voices in the back of my mind. It was a while until I realised Zigzag had been silent throughout all this, and I did not believe for a second that he'd spent his entire life without inflicting humiliation on someone for his own amusement. He looked quite speculative actually, as if he was thinking about something important. Maybe he was remembering when I fucked up the TV by plugging my straighteners in. Shit better snap him out of that.

"So Zigzag," I said casually "You pranked anyone?" What was I saying? He was just going to prank me now. He shook his head. I was impressed. "Really?" I had to keep him talking, yet he hadn't said a word to me in a while.

"I guess I could put a scorpion in your room." he smirked. I stared at him with wide eyes. Surely not? "But I don't think you'd thank me for that." he leant across the table, hands clasped "and I wouldn't reach my target before you left would I?"

Then X piped up "When _are_ you leaving Sunray?" they all seemed to realise that I wasn't there forever.

"When I complete my mission." I said proudly, without even thinking. Oh crap they weren't meant to know about the mission.

"What mission?" Caveman spoke up.

"Uhhh, well…" right here it was Rachel, your time to shine, use your quick thinking, outwitting mind to come up with an amazingly believable and realistic mission that would quite nicely cover your real one. Like a real secret agent. "My mission is to er…prevent Ziggy's mission from happening!" god I was good. Yet felt immensely mean when I saw his face drop. "Nah!" I corrected "It a secret mish. Can't let any of you lot in on it, CIA will go mental,"

They looked thoroughly unconvinced. It was only until Zig spoke, in a dreamy kind of voice, that I was sure I was off the hook,

"Maybe we could do a prank here," he said, almost to himself. The eyes of the boys lit up, jumping at the chance of mischief.

"Yeah!" I agreed. Anything to keep them off my scent. "like…like…" I cast my eyes around the room for inspiration.

Nada.

"Like," Armpit said slowly then gaining momentum as his brilliant idea took form "We could swap Pendanski's tablets for your cat worming ones!" he said enthusiastically.

My jaw dropped at the pure pranksta skill of this guy "Oh my god!" I exclaimed "That's brilliant!"

The other D tenters seemed equally in awe of our new God, grinning away at his own ingenious.

"We are so doing that!" X-Ray decided.

The plan was executed with the utter most skill and precision. By that I mean the guys picked the lock on Penny's separate room and just barged straight in, searching for his blue tablets, whilst I casually strolled into my cabin- peeking in to check the meeting wasn't still in place- and stealthily slipped the cat tabs into my pocket and ninja styled it out of there, geniusly using the sand storm like a cloak. Upon my return to the canteen I vaguely wondered why I wasn't being pounced upon by the other tents in the camp, and then I saw the D tenters had assumed this would happen and stationed themselves at the doorway, like an army.

I suddenly felt ridiculously important at that moment, with my own special forces bodyguard team, I could be the US President. So we strolled through the Canteen, I noticed eyes were on us, so I gave curt little nods to my fellow people in a serious way, I even threw in a quick salute now and again, just to drill in my importance to the criminals. Magnet and Squid exchanged glances at my actions, yet they knew they were not high ranking enough to talk to me themselves. A hand had placed itself on the small of my back, to keep me moving, and I was glad of it, it made the likelihood of a rear assassination less likely.

Then we reached the room, and knocked furtively on the door which opened only enough for us to slip in one by one. As soon as the door closed we set to work like a bunch of ninjas, slyly popping out the cat wormies and slipping them into his little pill case which had the days of the week on each little compartment. Then we disappeared, like smoke, out of the room and settled ourselves comfortably back in our respective positions.

Oh yeah

The CIA actually _will _be calling me for their next assignment.


	23. To Your Rescue

_Just re-read some old reviews from you guys and I don't think I ever told you how awesome you all are. It means so much to me that you not only took the time to carry on reading my work, but you commented on it too. Thank you guys so much. I know I haven't updated as much as I should have lately, so thanks to you all who've stuck around long enough. Also I read a review correcting what I said about British rain that made me laugh, where I'm from (in Britain) it rains all the time AND actually chucks it down like a mofo, guess it's different everywhere you go __J__._

"We are so badass," I said smiling lazily, draped over the moth eaten and destroyed sofa, vaguely missing my acquired weapon. I should have persuaded Mr Sir to lend me his gun again. All a sudden a shadow crossed over me. I looked up to see a scary looking guy leaning over me.

"What d'you want Lump?" X-Ray asked narrowing his eyes, though you could barely see them through his dusty glasses.

"We want you to share," he growled. Upon closer reflection I realised that he was flanked by two equally big and scary looking guys. He jerked his head in my direction "You've had her since she's been here. We want a go,"

"Uh" I started "the hell? I am _right_ here."

"Leave this to me Ray," Zig said, patting my knee consoling before he stood up. Oh god, don't get killed. "Look Lump," he said in an annoyed voice, X and Squid loyally took up his sides. "Ray's a human being, she doesn't belong to anyone alright?"

The sentiment was sweet, but I couldn't see him getting through to this guy.

"Bull," he replied "You just want her all to yourself. We've all seen you, acting like a psycho around her, she's probably too scared to get away. We'll help you babe," he reached out to grab my arm. Zigzag closed his arm around Lump's wrist before he could reach me.

"Just back off Lump," Squid warned, studying Zig carefully. I myself glanced at Ziggy, his jaw was set and his eyes flashed dangerously. Shit, maybe this guy should back off. But he didn't, he pushed Zig away by his chest, with a force that knocked him to the floor.

Trouble ensued.

Ziggy jumped up, practically foaming at the mouth and lunged at Lump, tackling him straight to the ground,

"Zig!" Squid rushed forward to pull him off, but X-Ray advanced to try and beat the crap out of Lump's cronies, who were honing in on Zig, who was engaged in a pretty heated struggle on the floor. I glanced at the other D-tenters in shock. What the hell was going on?!

It only took them two seconds to get involved; their 'all for one and one for all' attitude valiantly clicking into gear. "Oh shit," I hissed. If I didn't do something then they'd all blame me, or worse another one of Lump's buddies would take the opportunity to snatch me whilst my bodyguards were otherwise preoccupied. So I did something that I'd swear I'd never do.

I got involved in a fist fight.

I leapt over the back of the sofa- like in the movies- and aided Squid in tearing the brawling boys apart. Zigzag was yelling at us to get off of him, lashing out, and his elbow smacked me right in the eyebrow.

"Ah jesus christ Zig!" I cried out, clutching my battle wound. He spun around and saw the fountain of blood trickling down my face. I may as well have been shot! Oh God how much blood can you lose before you die? Surely I'd surpassed it by now.

"Shit Ray-ray!" he said leaping to my side as I took my last breaths,

"Go on without me!" I moaned "I'm not worth the risk!"

Behind Zig, through my blurred vision, I saw Squid attempting to hold Lump from relunging, and failing. But before he could break Squid's hold, Zigzag had heaved me up, and pulled me into Penny's secret medical room, stashed with his random tablets. The door shut with a satisfactory click and I practically collapsed onto a table. Zig came to check on me, holding me straight by my shoulders.

"Is it fatal?" I asked, preparing for the worst.

"Man up," he hissed, pushing the heel of his hand firmly onto my horrific flesh wound. "Sorry I hit you,"

He mumbled after a while, searching for something to wipe the blood off my face with.

"Sorry I made you fight with Flump," I mumbled back, not overly eager to admit blame. It must've been the concussion.

"Lump," he corrected me.

"Whatevs,"

"Can I borrow your shirt?" he asked.

"What?!" I jerked back.

"For the blood! Get your mind out the gutter Sunny,"

"Well you use your shirt if you're that bothered. I'm not stripping off!" though by now I was squinting as the blood was running into my eye. I ran my arm across my face to soak up some of it, but then my arm was full of blood.

"You'll probably need stitches," he sighed in annoyance as if it was my fault he'd elbowed me.

"Well I'm terribly sorry! Next time I'll keep a keen eye out for any flailing limbs shall I?" surely there was some ancient cloth lying around to de-blind myself? At this point I was pretty prepared to shove my shirt in my eye. "Will you help me out here?" I asked in annoyance.

"I am helping!" he gestured to the hand he was still pressing again my head.

"Yeah well it's not doing much is it? I can't see a bloody thing here. Pun not intended."

"Chill out I've told you to take your shirt off." I could hear him getting pissed off, but it was his fault I was bleeding to death. Which I took no time in reminding him.

"You shouldn't be smacking me in the face in the first place then should ya?"

"What, defending you?"

"I didn't ask you to!"

"That's the point Ray! I did it because I wanted to," and with an angered flourish he pulled his own top over his head and pressed it against my head so hard I thought he was going to knock it off.

"I don't want your grubby t-shirt Zig!" I moaned, flinging it off. He took a step back.

"Why are you so god damn difficult?! I'm trying to help. I've apologised. What more do you want?"

"I don't know!" I cried back "I want to not be in this fucking desert maybe? Getting smacked in the face during brawls between criminals! I want to be back home with my brother who thinks we have a cat and my crazy mum who sent me here for gold. Hell I'll even go back and beg for my job back with hella mental Zoë right now. I might owe her about eight gallons of milk but right now I'll take it, right now-"

And then I went completely blind as my vision went black. I panicked about a microsecond before I realised I had just closed my eyes. Zigzag and taken several steps forward and, in what I can only imagine was a desperate plea to shut me up, pushed his lips up against mine. My natural reaction was to close my eyes, until I realised that he was actually kissing me and flung them open again. He pulled back quickly.

"Sorry," he mumbled softly "I couldn't help it, I love it when you ramble on about stuff that makes no sense."

I nodded numbly, then, what must have been because of the obvious concussion I had, I grabbed his neck and pulled him back into a kiss, forgetting completely my bleeding head, annoyance and sheer desperation to get out of this place. In fact, at that moment in time, there was nowhere I'd rather be. He pulled back only enough to mumble,

"Mission accomplished," and then leant back in.


End file.
